I sort of suspect that its a possibility my partner is having an affair. he's an absolutely fantastic liar - seriously, the best anyone has ever met, honestly.
I have never confronted him about this as it has only just occured to me, but last night he told me he didn't trust me at all.
Do men tell their aprtners they don't trust them when they are the ones having an affair?
And if so....why?
Are there any other tell tale signs, and no silly ones like lipstick on his collar, he really wouldnt be that stupid!! Thanks
2007-12-20 20:59:38 · 15 answers · asked by sweet_steph27 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i would just tell u that u r a fool to trust such a man!!
2007-12-20 21:03:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
*sigh* Yes, men tend to get extremely defensive and say things to their partners when THEY have something to feel guilty about. Other tell-tale signs: Does he try to pick fights with you so he can just blow up and leave? This happens a lot so men find an excuse to get out of the house and go see the other women. Have you lacked in intimacy? Another sign that he's gettin' busy elsewhere and by nature can only pack enough for a few trysts a day. Has his physical affection declined? Has his patience with you dwindled? Is he gone a lot? Has he suddenly gotten a new hobby? There are many, many signs to look for - any sudden changes in his behavior - but remember this, even the dirtiest dog will have his day and he will have tangled such a web of lies that he'll wind up telling on himself - granted, you haven't ditched the loser already. But if you are having doubts and you are having trust issues, perhaps it would be best to part ways - this relationship is in jeopardy and you both need to reassess your partnership and decide if it's worth salvaging - affair or not.
2007-12-21 05:07:52 · answer #2 · answered by *Meg* 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I have in fact cheated (everyone I have never done it again, I learnt from it and I was also about 17, now 30, will never do it again either) but my point is that I did misdirect my trust issues on my partner by saying I didn't trust him when in fact I knew at the time it was me I didn't trust, he had done nothing to not be trusted.
If your man is going away all the time and doesn't want to be around you, he may or may not be cheating, but he obviously doesn't want to be around you and you need to find out why.....not some pissy little excuse either a real reason "I don't like your attitude" or "your breath smells bad" lol. None of this "I need time to think" think about what??? If you talk to me we could think together.
If you suspect he is cheating then either try and gather some evidence yourself (but beware it can backfire, if you get busted or confront him and it turns out to be innocent) or plain out right ask him if he is because you are feeling like he would rather be anywhere you aren't.
Anyone male or female can be good, great or really bad liars, but the only thing.....if you lie, you will eventually get caught out big time.
2007-12-21 06:02:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
After he goes off somewhere,the sure telltale sign is when he comes back,see if he is interested in sex.
If he is not ,then there is a chance that he may be cheating,or better yet..another sign is :
Run in the house,don't say much ,and jump in shower first thing. That is a sign.
Long unexplained absences,and excuses like traffic was terrible,or I have to work late.
Some of these might not be valid,but because they are so hard to detect ,that is why they are signs.
Shows up with flowers for no reason is another good one.
See if you can smell perfume on his shirts,or on him,other women like to leave their little clues to mark their territory so to speak.
Checks his cellphone a lot,and deletes messages.
Do you get hangup calls at home?
Ask him when the next company family picnic or party is,if he says they cancelled all parties..and it is a sure bet he does not want you around his new girlfriend.
Call him during his lunch hour at work,you might get your answer then.
2007-12-21 05:12:33 · answer #4 · answered by Dfirefox 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You ask about whether men accuse their partner of having an affair when they are having one themselves. It's not just affairs, but a general thing that people accuse/suspect others of doing the things that are indeed doing themselves.
If you already know what a fantastic liar he is, why would you even want to be with him? I hate liars, and if I found out a guy I was with lied to me, he'd be out of there. I think you need to get rid of him. You can find an honest guy and live more happily.
2007-12-21 05:09:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
1. We only went for a drink
2. It didnt mean anything
3. She's only a work collegue (yeah right)
4. I have to work late
5. I stayed at my friends last night
6. We have a weekend seminar (sure ya do!)
7. I've never heard of a Pamela
8. Someone must be using my mobile
9. She's only an internet chat friend (yeah sure)
10. I was out with the boys last night
anytime he says any of the above, you can be sure! hehe
2007-12-21 05:07:53 · answer #6 · answered by Puppet Dictator 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Only if it was that straight forward.
Sorry, I think it is much more harder to tell.
Good Luck
P.S. I do know that often when the Republicans want dismiss (discount) an issue, they "laugh" it off and try to make it sound like a "laughable" issue. This one is obvious. Nobody laugh when they are in an heated "discussion" other than with small children.
The other thing that liars seem to do is shift focus - by saying
"me! how about your ..."
2007-12-21 05:03:58 · answer #7 · answered by Lover not a Fighter 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes they do, call it a preemptive strike. Kind of the best defense being a good offense. Unless there is something in your behavior that has earned mistrust?
2007-12-21 05:04:29 · answer #8 · answered by pablasmom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Loses interest in you, seems distant and daydreaming all the time. gone a lot w/ lame excuses. guards cell phone from you EVER seeing it. runs into the other room to take calls. etc..
2007-12-21 05:03:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A telltale sign is that you keep walking in on him having sex with another woman...
The burden of being hilarious is the pressure to use it
2007-12-21 05:06:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They do this in order to project their own guilt onto you. It's a control tactic. Ditch this man. He's a liability.
2007-12-21 05:07:44 · answer #11 · answered by Orla C 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋