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Pls star if you like it..Thx.

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.

Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work.

Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans was more than I could stand.

With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.

Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight."

He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call.

The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go.

It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously.

Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.

Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable.

When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.

My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.

At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"

I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-12-20 16:44:40 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

16 answers

hahahahahahaha that is so funny! omg I love it!

hahahahahaha I can't stop laughing

clever

2007-12-20 17:25:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

Had me laughing at 1st paragraph but you know no 12 guests could sit there without cracking!

2007-12-20 16:51:19 · answer #2 · answered by Woman in Red 4 · 1 0

LOL!

The guests' ribs must've cracked from all the laughter they held in! Good one!

2007-12-20 18:28:12 · answer #3 · answered by Din-din 5 · 1 0

I remembered that joke part of the way down from reading it.....too funny!!

2007-12-20 16:59:39 · answer #4 · answered by ~Mutha_of2(DoS)~Hand-sum Boyz~ 2 · 1 0

♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔
Honestly that was the funniest joke i read today!
Thanks!
Merry Christmas!
♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔ ♔

2007-12-20 18:15:22 · answer #5 · answered by jessica 3 · 1 0

WOW! That was a real SCREAM! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Here's a star for a lovely joke. Oh my God! I'm still laughing...!!!

2007-12-20 18:09:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2 1

That was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo freakin' funny!!!!!!

Thanx a billion!!!

2007-12-20 16:51:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

LOL. 😂😂 the guests would have been holding there breath they would have been cursing EEW. LOL

2015-05-20 06:45:57 · answer #8 · answered by shan 1 · 0 0

worth the read, lmfao

2007-12-20 17:07:19 · answer #9 · answered by ii337 3 · 1 0

old joke somebody emailed it to me 3 years ago.

2007-12-20 16:55:19 · answer #10 · answered by tikababy 6 · 1 2

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