Has anyone brought their son up as a girl or at one point considered it or perhaps have an opinion about it.?

Question

My sister has a son who is now 4 years old. When he was first born we were not sure what sex he was. At first we thought he was a girl, but after the nurse straightened his legs and pushed his pubic fat down we were able to tell, although barely, that he was a boy. My sister was advised buy a couple of physicians and other health professionals to raise him as a girl. The general message was it would be easier for him to live as a girl instead of a boy. My sister took their advice for about 2 years, although no surgery was performed, but she has since been raising him as a boy. This was a difficult dilemma for our family, but we think she ended up doing the right thing. What do others think? Any similar experiences?

Answer 1

I know someone who was born with indeterminant gender. The birth was over 50 years ago, and the course of action was to ask the father what he wanted the child to be. Dad picked a boy. They raised the child as a boy, but "he" never developed the musculature of a male, never grew any facial hair or the normal male patterns for body hair, and when "he" was 18, "He" started growing breasts. "He" actually had ovaries. This wasn't discovered until well after she'd already been severely beaten for being gay, ostracized by her family for acting like a gay male... she led one Hell of a screwed up life over this. I used to say, "If they knew then what they know NOW, she would have been raised rightfully as a female."

Now I know better.

It is ridiculous to assign sex to a child based on external evidence only. The presence of external genitalia, while a handy way to identify if we have a he or a she, are not the ONLY things that make us male or female. The child is male. The child should be raised as a male. Period.

Answer 2

hi... your brother should be raised as a boy. and later in life if he is different in the private areas, doctors can help.

there was a documentary recently about a set of twin boys. one was circumcised and there was an "accident", so to speak. the doctor recommended raising him as a girl.

he was taken, in the meantime, to a horrible psychiatrist who was supposed to have abused him and his brother... (while he was being raised as a girl all the while).

at puberty's onset, the "girl" didn't feel like a girl and didnt fit in anywhere.. finally his parents told him the truth - -he was really a boy. told his brother, also.

him and his twin brother had a TERRIBLE time as the result of the abusive, and horrifying treatment of the psychiatrist, and because of the gender issue with the one twin.

the first boy ended up committing suicide several years after the truth was out.. he was mentally disturbed and i believe it was post traumatic stress from the experience with the psychiatrist, as well as finding out the truth about his "sister", who was not a girl after all.

later, the second twin, managed to find a wife and got married.. he'd had some corrective surgery beforehand, i think it was. his wife loved him dearly. and then one day, he went out into a field with a gun and took his own life.

i think being raised as a boy, if that is what you are, is the best thing to do. today, through the miracle of modern surgery/medicine, i'm sure this child grows up, he can get help with any type of physical issue he may have...

i took the time to find the story of the twin boys... see the link below.


take care.

Answer 3

I just studied this in one of my college classes. They interviewed adults who were born with ambiguous genitalia. They all wished that no surgery had been done and the choice had been left up to them.

She needs to NOT listen to the doctors, but to her child. She can contact organizations that will help her through this.

I think I would just let the child pick out whatever it wanted to wear. It's the child's life and ultimately, the child knows if it's a girl or boy. Then, when the time comes, whatever surgery that needs to be done, IF THE CHILD DECIDES TO HAVE SURGERY, can be done. Some of the adults would have preferred to have been left alone because they suffer daily from the pain of the surgeries.

The child at this point should be able to say how she/he feels.

Answer 4

I brought myself up as a girl and it's all my parents fault because they kept dressing me in my Aunts hand me downs and it wasn't easy being teased by the other boys and girls. I never knew there were so many bullies in the world until one day I punched this girls lights out and when we were wrestling everyone saw I was a boy, things changed after that. I had led such a sheltered life before that. It was a good thing too because I was starting to develope facial hair, but no breasts, thats what the fight was about. Life is as normal as ell now, I got 7 kids, a beautiful wife and an electric shaver. And a dog. No more Barbies for me.

Is this another dumb blonde joke?

Answer 5

Not me or anyone I know. I heard of a story in the Human Sexuality class which lead to our introduction into what is called intersexuality. Meaning that the person has both male and female sexual organs. I think it was in 1969 a family had twin boys and they were having both of them circumsized during one of them the person performing it messed up and cut the penis clearly off. Instead of letting the child grow up like a boy they treated him like a girl as well as he got older he was given estrogen pills and had surgery once he was older to create a vagina. I do not agree with what these parents did.

Answer 6

I surely have under no circumstances experienced this, yet in my opinion it would want to be psychologically fit to advance the baby with what the dna says the childs sex is. at the same time as i think that nurture has extra to do with someone's' personality and so on, dna is significant. If a boy is raised as a lady, she will be in a position to under no circumstances advance breasts with out hormones. she will be in a position to under no circumstances have a era. and so on. rather testosterone tiers will be severe. And vice versa. ok, so the boy would no longer have a lot of a penis or testicals. possibly he receives made relaxing of interior the locker room, yet there hopefully wont be any hormonal subject matters at the same time as the baby is going by puberty. Now, in the experience that they prefer to modify sexes at the same time as they are older on their personal, then have at it. even if that's an imformed determination and they are attentive to hormonal subject matters and all that stuff, then they have each excellent to p.c. out with regardless of the actuality that sex they choose. even if, I dont imagine that's good for a discern to 'opt for' what sex the baby will be in accordance to defects or malformed genitals. flow with what the dna says.

Answer 7

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JUST BECAUSE HE WON'T BE ABLE TO HAVE SEX, DOES NOT MEAN HE DOENS'T HAVE THE MASCULINE HORMONES!!!!!

If he is raised as a girl, he will grow facial hair, and will in a scense, be gay and confused about why he may of may not be attracted to women.

There was a kid in our town that killed himself in this EXACT SAME SITUATION! I couldn't find that particular article, but here is another article where a kid killed themselves for the same reason! http://www.lifesite.net/ldn/2004/may/04051010.html
There will be a woman out their for him. There are prostetics. I am not homophobic by any means, I just know of too many instances where this has caused soooooo much pain. Raise him as a boy. PLEASE! It's a shame that doctors would tell people to raise their child as another sex, simply becuase our culture holds sex at such a high regaurd. He will come to terms with it. Lying to him becuase it's easier is cowardly and she has absolutely 100% done the right thing!

Answer 8

She followed advice of professionals. Is the genitalia all there? Sorry I can't imagine how they couldn't tell. I think she followed their advice until she realized that it wasn't in his best interests to follow their advice. She is his mommy and knows him better than anyone else so I think she did the right thing.

Answer 9

i think get a DNA test to determine the true sex of the child and raise them as that.