My Grandmother doesn't get along with her siblings and has done everything she can to try to keep all of her family out of contact with them. We have just found out that my Mom's uncle died months ago and my Grandmother NEVER TOLD HER! We are all so hurt by this. She is always doing/saying something to hurt my Mom or my Mom's kids. Every time we think things are getting better, she does something worse. If we try to talk to her about how she makes us feel she just gets angry and nasty towards us for long periods of time. Any suggestions on how to make her understand how hurtful she is being? She is elderly and very stubborn and set in her ways.
2007-12-20 11:44:11 · 4 answers · asked by quitequiet 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Sadly it's not that much of a disposition change, things like this have been going on since my Mom was a little girl...it's just getting worse and worse now. : (
2007-12-20 11:49:26 · update #1
I feel there isn't very much you can do to change the way she is. My Nanna is very hurtful as well to my mother. When my mother's sister died my Nanna told my mother that her only daughter had died. That really cut my mum. After a really long drive to see her (13 hours by car) the first words that usually come out of my Nanna's mouth are "Gee you have gotten fat, Beverly". She has even gone so far as to make the long trip down to my mother's home only to hand deliver a card to the mail box but not come inside when my mother was there. She can be a spiteful and nasty old lady and I know that she will probably never change. I have my own family now and I don't make any effort to see her or call her. She has always favored my aunt's children and have bought them lavish and expensive gifts and helped them out anytime they needed it where my siblings have struggled to get by. I don't want her money, I just hate that she played favorites.
Long story short, I don't think she will ever change... you can't teach an old dog new tricks or so they say. If she is set in her ways then she will stay that way. I'm sorry that you and your family have been so hurt by her. It really isn't fair. She won't hear that she is doing anything wrong as you said without making it a federal case and making everyone suffer for it for extended periods of time. I would just try to distance myself from her and tell her when she is ready to be a part of a loving family then you can talk things through. It seems like a harsh call to do this to a lady so advance in her life but what else can you do?
Good luck and I hope that you and your family can get past her bad behavior.
2007-12-20 12:00:48 · answer #1 · answered by Onyx ♠ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there are some people that are just angry bitter darn right nasty for no reason other than they can.
don't waste your energy trying to change her she won't change and when she dose pass maybe the world will be a little brighter.
sorry to say that about your grandmother but there are people in this world that do nothing but make the people around them miserable.
2007-12-20 12:20:05 · answer #2 · answered by Cooter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes the elderly experience changes in their disposition
2007-12-20 11:46:50 · answer #3 · answered by Tiger by the Tail 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds just like my grandma who died. Sadly none of us were that sad when it happened. All I can say is that she never changed and I wouldn't expect yours will either. I'd stay way from her.
2007-12-20 11:59:26 · answer #4 · answered by c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋