How do I explain to my family why I don't want to celebrate Christmas any longer?

Question

I am disgusted with the true origins of this holiday and how this christmas does not really honor Jesus Christ at all and how the world would rather follow the traditions of men than obey the commandments of Jehovah God.

But I also have a problem. my mother's side of the family chooses to only get together once a year and it's on the pagan christmas day. what do i do?? I also have a young son, i don't want to confuse him for I am going to teach him the truth not pagan stuff. i also don't want him to never see the family either. But would being there make us a participant in the holiday? I don't really know how to go about this. How can I go about this with out offending them and causing them to think that we are just abandoning them?

those who also choose not to celebrate answer only please. thank you.

i agree with Free thinking american as far as explaining that these are pagan traditions. but the rest of you I don't quite agree with. Maybe the rest of you should really read what the Bible says. and for your information what the Jehovah's Witnesses teach is the truth.

the rest of you can think what you want to think,

Answer 1

Each individual Christian must weigh each circumstance for himself, and decide for himself whether his presence at a particular event might constitute "celebrating" paganisms, or whether it might seem to indicate to onlookers that the Christian was compromising or demeaning his own religious convictions, or whether it might confuse impressionable children in his household.

Significantly, to a large extent that depends on the tolerance and cooperation of relatives who may have sincere religious differences with Jehovah's Witnesses. So-called holidays may simply be the most convenient time for a family reunion because the majority of businesses and government agencies are closed, but a Witness will still keep in mind to avoid any gathering which he believes will tend to work toward compromising his religious beliefs and the upbringing of his children, or would give fuel to those who would reproach Jehovah and Jehovah's Witnesses.

A non-Witness family which values its Witness family members can do much to make them feel comfortable attending a family function which happens to be scheduled during a government/business holiday. As long as it is true, a non-Witness host could plainly communicate that his gathering is about family, and the timing is simply when most of the family has free from work and school and other responsibilities.

Whether the host communicates such sentiments proactively or not, a Jehovah's Witness such as the questioner might share her concerns with the hosting relatives. She might explain that she certainly does not want to "celebrate" Christmas, but she does want to spend time with the family and she hopes to do that without having the trappings of the holiday overwhelm the reunion. The questioner can ask the hosting relatives if they believe that is possible, or if they can suggest another date when the family can have a nice reunion that focuses on the family rather on a particular religious festival.

If the hosting relative agrees that a reunion is possible which will not be overwhelmed by the holiday, then the questioner should thank the host sincerely, and mention seriously that the questioner is relying upon the host's word on the matter. Perhaps the questioner might remind the host how discouraging and disappointing it would be to the son if they traveled all the way to the host's home only to stay for just a few minutes because of an atmosphere of holiday trappings or intolerant comments from the other guests.

Perhaps the most saddening thing for a true Christian is the unwillingness of his non-Witness family members to associate on any basis but in connection with their religious holidays. Of course, when the choice is between acting to please God and Christ or acting to please one's family, the bible's principles are unmistakable.

(Matthew 10:35-37) For I came to cause division, with a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a young wife against her mother-in-law. Indeed, a man’s enemies will be persons of his own household. He that has greater affection for father or mother than for me is not worthy of me; and he that has greater affection for son or daughter than for me is not worthy of me.

(Luke 12:53) [Households] will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against her mother, mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.

Learn more:
http://watchtower.org/e/lmn/index.htm?article=article_08.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/rq/index.htm?article=article_11.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/20041215/article_02.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/20011115/article_02.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/20050101a/
http://watchtower.org/e/jt/

Answer 2

It's hard once you make that decision, but the freedom is wonderful.

They probably WILL be offended, and they will not understand where you are coming from. Stand firm and always let them know that it's nothing against them and that you still love them.

It took a couple of years for my, and my wife's, family to finally get the message. Things are still "funny" between us, but I can live with that. They think I'm taking my faith a little too seriously, but how else do I take it? Do I act like the majority of the "faithful" and just allow anything that feels good? Or do I stand on biblical principals?

We chose biblical principals, and that includes the seventh day Sabbath. The blessings have been incredible. Everything goes better for us than it ever did before.

If you have especially close family members who really respect you, like a cousin or sister, take them aside and explain in a non-judgmental way what you are feeling. Having an ally at a time like this can be a real blessing. I'll be praying you through your screen name since that's all I know.

I feel for you. It's not easy, but the first step is the hardest. Shalom.

Answer 3

If the hosting relative agrees that a reunion is possible which will not be overwhelmed by the holiday, then the questioner should thank the host sincerely, and mention seriously that the questioner is relying upon the host's word on the matter. Perhaps the questioner might remind the host how discouraging and disappointing it would be to the son if they traveled all the way to the host's home only to stay for just a few minutes because of an atmosphere of holiday trappings or intolerant comments from the other guests.

Answer 4

Well!
i am just now Finding out about the Pagans! And i understand what you are saying But i think that you should still give your son the gift but not only on Christmas day but you should do it year round to show him that Gifts are not everything and that if you be good that you can have a very special day every day!!!and through out the year teach him about it!!!
so that on Christmas Day i wont be a big suprise to them!!!
and try to explain to your family that you guys should not only get to gather on Christmas but once every 3 or 4 mounth so that you all can stay as a family!

Answer 5

I don't celebrate the day as such, but I do acknowledge the importance of the birth of Christ, and that the event was heralded by angels.

It is also one of the few times I can get together with my family.

Really though, let's say you did know what day Christ was born. The day would have been set on the Jewish calendar, therefore it would have fallen on a different day every year on the Gregorian calendar -- a "pagan" calendar? In any event, would you observe the day with your family, even though they chose to add symbolism that does not come down from Judaism or Christianity?

But the main, and most important thing of all is, how are you going to show Christian love to your own family if you allow this to be a dividing point? Are you going to violate the most important thing in Christianity in order to avoid something because of some perceived pagan influences? I think you would be surprised how many things in your life come down from pagan sources that you use every day, such as a watch that uses a base 12 counting system, and a 24 hour day.

You can teach your children what you know and believe. In the end, it is up to them. What do you suppose would be their thinking later if you sheltered them from their "pagan" relatives? What if they didn't conclude as you have?

There are lots of things out there, set up to test and try you, to see whether you will react and act as a Christian should, or one who puts such things above Christian love for one another.

.

Answer 6

Sounds to me like you're a Jehovah's Witness, and I love those people. I really do. We oftentimes refuse to answer our doors when they come knocking to share the bible truths with us, but we are going to need them one day. Watch what I tell you. I don't celebrate any holidays, and I won't lie when it comes to this time of the year I do get tempted. I mean it seems like everyone is in good cheer, shopping for presents, yada yada, but I know the true origin of Christmas, too, and I refuse to celebrate the birth of the 'sun'. Yes, the son people think they're celebrating the birth of is the actual 'SUN.'
And yes, if you showed up at your mother's house on Christmas, it would come across as you celebrating that day with your family, and you'll send off the wrong impression and stumble someone. Does this family not have family reunions once a year? If so, go see the family then. I'm sure they get together other times besides Christmas. Don't let the devil get you to thinking you can't do anything fun because you can. Just be creative and pray to Jehovah God, our Grand Creator.

Answer 7

Many people, even some Christians, celebrate Christmas as a secular holiday only - a time to get together with family and enjoy each other's company. They even exchange gifts.

You don't have to treat Christmas as a religious day. It can still just be a happy time with family. I would go, and not give up the one day a year that part of the family is together.

Answer 8

Good for you! I have not celebrated for about 20 years. It was a little shock for the family. At first they thought it was a money issue, like we couldn't afford to buy toys so we just said no more Christmas, but it wasn't like that. I see the truth behind it and it is not Biblical and is not commanded by God. It may be hard for others to see the truth. But do whatever you feel is right no matter what they think

Answer 9

Your son has summer vacation does he not? Visit the family then. Explaining the truth to him is never a bad idea. A tradition of honesty is never a bad thing. Something to grow up with.

You can and should give gifts at any time of the year. It will be a surprise and proof of real love rather than a certain time of year pressure.

Doing what is pleasing to Jehovah is always correct and beneficial for increased life.

Answer 10

I do not celebrate Christmas either, I do not follow any religion at all, but choose not to celebrate. However, I DO view this time as valuable time to spend with my family, we have a lovely time just being together without the every day burdens of work etc. My family have never really made a big fuss of Christmas so I didnt have to explain anything to them, but your reasons are pretty clear so why not just tell them what you wrote here?