I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. They wake in the middle of the night and come meet me in my bed. I tried putting them back in there bed and they scream and scream. how can I make it easier for them?
2007-12-19 16:14:20 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I read to them every night and we say our prayers. I would LOVE for them to stay sleeping with me....but when daddy comes home from work, Daddy has to sleep on the sofa. LOL
2007-12-19 16:22:45 · update #1
It's going to be very difficult and time consuming, but well worth it in the end!! When you are going to put the kids to bed..you need to establish a bedtime routine, that you will not break, except extreme circumstances. Like a drink of water, a bedtime story, and goodnight hugs and kisses. or something...
Tell your kids that you will see them in the morning, and that they need to stay in their own beds now. Remember to reward for good behavior, and do not 'punish' then in a sort. If they get up and come into your room, take them by the hand and walk them back to their own beds, they need to stay in their own beds. Each time they get up, you have to do this same routine...get up and walk them back to bed without saying a word!! Very important to not say 1 word to them during this transition. In the morning, talk about last night and what they remember, tell them again that it is time for them to stay in their own beds at night. Also in the morning, praise them for waking up in their own beds...maybe start a sticker chart....the ages of your kids would be perfect for it!!
Good Luck
Momma P
2007-12-19 16:29:56 · answer #1 · answered by Momma P 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
ok MommaP has the best advice....just keep taking them back to bed, they will catch on , the older they are the longer it will take. The only time my daughter has slept with me was when she was extremely sick, and once when we spent the night at the grandparents house and there was no extra beds...
I could have put her on the floor but it was really cold and hubby wasn't there, and I told her this was special and a treat we had a jammie party...but other than that even with bad dreams she sleeps in her own bed, I just comfort her there and then leave the room. I hope this works out for u
many hugs
Morgaine
2007-12-20 02:46:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They're 4 and 2, this is fairly normal- eventually they'll outgrow it, enjoy them while they're young. If it really bothers you then tell them they can come to your room but are not invited into your bed. If they have to lay on the floor they'll get tired of that and go sleep in their own bed. Also remind them of how nice their bed is- get special sheets or blankets they like and tell them this is just for them to use on their bed to sleep. If none of that works, send them back to their beds and let them scream you'll have probably 3 bad nights in a row, and then they'll get used to it and stop.
2007-12-20 00:24:59 · answer #3 · answered by Suburban Mom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's the 4 year old that must go first. The little one just follows along. You have to tell the older child that there is a great reward for sleeping in a big bed alone, that they can only receive while they sleep at night. Pretty soon, they will get curious, and try it out. That is where you have to step up and put a fancy gift under their bed while they sleep. That will work, for sure.
2007-12-20 00:23:57 · answer #4 · answered by Kingmambo 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
read them a bed time story, give them a stuffed animal, give them a nightlight ( in case the reason is that they are scared), give them warm milk before sleeping, it helps you fall a sleep. Try taking a walk(with them) before going to sleep, they'll be so tired they won't even wake up.
2007-12-20 00:18:59 · answer #5 · answered by celinuchis90 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is such a problems with so many families. Once it starts it is very difficult to stop it. It can be done but it is not going to be easy for any of you. I have successfully broken four of my sisters kids from this habit because she didn't have the guts to stand up to them. At one time she was sharing her bed with kids ages 2,4 7 and 12!!!! Her husband slept on the floor and they had to lock themselves in the bathroom to have sex because the kids would come looking for them.
Start by telling them that everyone has their own bed and this is our bed and this is your bed. It's a good idea to have a night time routine like brushing their teeth, go to the bathroom, and then have a story. Children respond well to routines and boundries. It makes them feel safe and secure.Remind them that they are going to stay in their own bed from now on. Assure them that you love them and put them to bed. When they get up and come into your bed, quietly and calmly take them by the hand and return them to their bed. You may have to carry them. IMPORTANT: Do not speak or interact with the child just reurn them to their bed. As you already have discovered, this will be followed by screaming and crying. DO NOT GIVE IN. When they come back to your bed repeatedly, just silently return them to their bed.
As you know, kids don't give up that easily especially if you have given in to their fits in the past. You may have accidentally taught them that you will give in to their desires if they pitch a big enough fit. Now is the time to change that habbit for good. Once you have made the decision for them to sleep in their own bed, then you must stick to your guns or the fits will get louder and longer until you give in.
Remember not to interact with the child when you are returning them to their bed, just take them back. In their minds they will figure out that if you won't give into them they will try to keep you up with them talking about it all night long.
Be prepared for at least several hours of them testing you over and over again. It may even take a few nights before they finally realize that you are not going to give in to them. They will come up with every excuse in the book from, "I gotta go potty" to " I want a drink of water." and the big one, "Ypu don't love me any more!" Take them to the potty first and leave a cup of water at their bedside. If there are monsters in the closet, then leave a night light on. Just don't give in no matter how tired and frustrated you are because they know if you are too tired and upset you will change your mind. DON'T.
Remember: YOU are the adult. YOU are the boss. YOU know what is right and wrong. YOU have control of your temper. Enlist the help of your husband but prepare him for the battle and make sure he follows the rules exactly. It helps if you remind him what is's like to have private time in bed without a two and four year old sleeping between the two of you.
I wish you the best of luck with this because like I said it is difficult for both parents as well as the child. Make sure you praise them in the morning for being such a big boy or girl by sleeping in their own bed. They will really be proud of themselves and you should be also.
2007-12-20 02:06:11 · answer #6 · answered by Kelly M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will have to keep putting them in their own bed even if they cry otherwise they will never stop coming into your bed.
2007-12-20 00:27:56 · answer #7 · answered by Bears Mom 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
So let them sleep with you. They won't be little forever...
2007-12-20 00:20:26 · answer #8 · answered by daa 7 · 4⤊ 2⤋