English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

For example, if I gave my daughter up for adoption, how long would I have to change my mind after the adoption takes place?

2007-12-19 13:38:17 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Adoption

21 answers

In some states, you would have 0 days. In reality once, the adoptive parents take possession of the child, it is very difficult to get him/her back. There have been cases where the adoptive parents even defy court orders and keep the child, dragging the case out for years.

If you have any doubt at all, do not sign papers and do not give up possession of your child.

2007-12-19 23:13:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 9 0

Once the "adoption" has occured, there may be nothing you can do (short of major issues, like the child was kidnapped).

Most states require the child live with the adoptive family for a time prior to the final adoption, usually 6 months, sometimes as much as a year. Until the adoption is finalized, you may be able to get the child back.

However, if you are considering giving a child up for adoption and this is one of the questions you ask... than perhaps you should not give up the child. To revoke the adoption at the 11th hour will hurt both your child and the adotive family a great deal.

Don't adopt away your child unless you are certain, be sure it is best for both you and the child.

2007-12-19 23:17:01 · answer #2 · answered by Wundt 7 · 3 1

it's usually not years. and like most people stated, it varies from state to state. some states have 0 days others 90 days.

since you gave this scenario as an example, i suspect that either you are pregnant and considering adoption, or you are asking the question for someone else. either way, i'll like to add some of my suggestions about a changing your mind, from the perspective of someone who's been there.

although i believe that a women should have the right to change her mind (as i did 16 years ago) i STRONGLY encourage every pregnant women who is unsure about an adoption plan to:

1) avoid pre-birth matching

2) accept no gifts, money or assistance from the paps.

3) try to get your own health insurance (medicaid or your parents' policy) so that the paps are not required to pay for your medical expenses.

4) if the aparents are matched pre-birth, don't allow them into the delivery room. not only is this your private time, but it's highly coercive.

5) hold and feed your baby after birth. sometimes, the baby doesn't become real until after s/he is born.

6) don't sign ANYTHING if you are unsure. and the papers you sign at the adoption agency when you are pregnant are NOT a termination of parental rights! i was threatened by that and almost gave in, but later found out that what i signed was a release of my medical records.

7) after the birth, if the adoption agency is pushing you to relinquish in the hosptial or you feeled "bullied", demand to speak to the hospital social worker to help you work out your feelings. regardless of your aplan, YOU ARE A PATIENT IN THAT HOSPITAL and are entitled to every service as anyother birthing mother.

8) when you are pregnant, you only have an ADOPTION PLAN. not a relinquishment! also you are not a birthmother until after you sign over your rights. until then, you are a MOTHER.

bottom line: you have all the rights until you relinquish in court. if you are unsure, you only have a small window to change your mind. and once you begin signing papers and release the baby to the aparents, the process gets muddier.

like grapesgum suggested: if you are unsure, D.O. N.O.T hand over your baby and sign any papers!

2007-12-21 02:00:26 · answer #3 · answered by tish 5 · 1 0

Hi,

My husband and I are wanting to adopt a little girl. We have been looking for an adoptive mother for a private adoption for about a year now. We have an adoption lawyer so we have asked a lot of questions. So the answer to your question is a month or less. It varies from state to state. You would need to check with the state you are going to finalize your adoption. The other people are right please make up your mind before before deciding to place. If you do it and change your mind it will be devastating for the adoptive parents. If you would like anymore help with legal questions you are more than welcome to email me at michelle.miller@pobox.com I wish you and your little one all the love and luck in the world.


Michelle

2007-12-20 14:12:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

You don’t have years. The longest one would be a few months, and it depends on the state. Unless there was something wrong in the adoption that is really the only way a birthparent could get their birthchild back after an adoption is finalized and the reclaim period has expired. One big one is when the birthfather is not notified then he can attempt to get his birthchild back and can be successfully, even if it’s been years. Plus custody cases can last a few years. If papers weren’t filed on time etc.

2007-12-19 15:29:24 · answer #5 · answered by Spread Peace and Love 7 · 5 0

It may vary from one state to another. I was adopted at birth, and I think my birthmother had thirty days to change her mind. I think the rules are different for foster/adoptions too.

If you are certain that adoption is the best option for your daughter, you may want to consider open adoptions where you could work out details with her adoptive parents about visits, letters, phone calls, etc. Each open adoption is different too. My best friend from high school has an semi-open adoption, but she hasn't received a photo from the adoptive parents for several years now. My neice on the other hand, gets letters and photos regularly, and sees her birthdaughter at least once or twice a year (possibly even more often than that, I just don't know all of the details).

I think that open adoption is the best of both worlds for both adoptees and birthparents. It's completely natural for adoptees to have curiosity about their birthparents, and it's completely natrual for birthparents to struggle with feelings of loss and greif when they can't see their birthchildren grow up. Open adoption can address all of these issues.

2007-12-20 03:55:51 · answer #6 · answered by KimGonzo 2 · 1 1

Don't play games if you have concerns about giving up a child or not. Before my wife and I adopted our first child, we read books that pointed out problem areas such as with you. A child is not a dress, pair of shoes, or something else that you can ask for a return or exchange because you changed your mind. No matter how small a child is, there are three people that you will destroy their lifes because of actions such as you are thinking about, the baby, new mother and father. You have the right to do what you did, but the baby has a right to live a life with people that love and know what they want to do for that baby, not think about changing their minds after the baby is in their home..
Sorry, I can't support your thoughts and actions, but you're talking years, not just a few weeks to change your actions.

2007-12-20 16:01:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 2

This varies by state. Most states it's a matter of days, but some states it's longer. Our daughter's birth mother had 10 days to change her mind.

After the waiting period, the birth mother would have to provide cause such as coercion or bribery or some other factor that would render any standard contract invalid.

If you are considering adoption there are several sites with good information. I might recommend http://adoption.com which along with some good information has forums that many birth mothers post on regularly.

2007-12-20 07:59:02 · answer #8 · answered by Passenger (wow widow) 7 · 3 1

You wouldn't. Once you sign those papers it's done. No going back.
In KY you have 3 weeks to make the final decision. Once you sign those relinquishment (NOT abandonment) papers, you are done. The judge rescinds your rights and transfers custody to the new parents.
You can't go back once the adoption is finalized.

**What kind of moron gives the thumbs down to answers like these? Every state is different. I know, for a fact, what KY does because I went through it there.

2007-12-20 11:30:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2 1

It's even less than the answers the others have given. Depending on which state you live in, in the United States, you only have a very limited time to revoke consent of your termination of parental rights. It has nothing to do with whether or not the adoption even gets finalized. A few states have no revocation period at all.

Here's a link of the list of how long you would have. (Drat. It's disappeared from the web.) Realize that many of the states with a very short revocation period are directly related to having to prove fraud or coercion. Something terrible would have had to go wrong for you to be able to prove it.

2007-12-19 14:05:19 · answer #10 · answered by magic pointe shoes 5 · 10 1

fedest.com, questions and answers