Okay, so we've been dating for a couple of months.
He goes partying alot with his older friends and gets drunk nearly every weekend.
Which i already hate, but you know. it's his life kind of thing.
But today he told me that a few weeks ago he smoked marijuana.
Then he said that he really regrets it but he was drunk at the time.
like that was an excuse or something.
i don't know what to do, please. any advice would be really appreciated, cos i'm seeing him tonight and i don't even know what to say, or avoid it or something. i'm confused...
2007-12-19 12:47:55 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First, you need to come to the realization that you cannot save him from himself. He may snap back from it, he may stay the present course, or he may get worse.
The question for you is:
- Is this something you want to be around?
- Are you willing to accept the risks that come with this lifestyle?
- Have you told him your feelings about his drinking to excess every weekend? If so, and he's continued to do it, then this should give you a clue which has priority in his life.
While it is great that you want to help this guy - he must want to help himself first. Right now, it doesn't look like he is at that point.
Kids sometimes go through a phase like this. There is a sense of invincibility and 'I can handle it' or 'I can stop if I want to'. Like many of my friends, I went through it. It took almost getting killed to open my eyes to my drinking problem.
As for how to handle it short term: Try to let him know your feelings about the drinking and his having smoked pot. He may listen, he may not. Don't do it "stop or I'll leave" - but just that you don't like it & prefer he not do it. If he continues, then it's time to move on. You don't need to warn him - he'll know where you stand.
I hope you can get through to him - but be prepared to stand tough. This type of situation is not a time to forego your principals in the name of love.
Best of luck!
2007-12-19 13:08:11 · answer #1 · answered by David M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can stay with him or not its up to you but you should tell him that you dont like his "partying habits".
2007-12-19 12:56:30 · answer #2 · answered by mercurysdemon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldn't hang around this guy too much. He's bad news.
2007-12-19 12:52:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋