any advice? my life is plummeting?

Question

iv asked questions here before. sometimes i received good answers, many times i received not good ones such as "See a doctor." so im not expecting the best from this but id like any advice anyway.

im just so desperate. im 18, iv had some severe depression for about a year or so now. i feel like i cant tell anyone about it. i havnt told a soul so far. its basically just literally ruining my life and almost every relationship iv created in the past (i mean friends or just any kind of relationship, even ones i formed back when i was really young) have seemed to dissipate inside of me. to all them they dont know because iv hid it. but inside i feel like i dont even know my life long friends anymore. iv been feeling like i cant even turn to my family anymore. everyones becoming so distant from me and i feel there's no where to turn. im living in some kind of empty void now. does anyone have ANY kind of advice for me???? besides from the too often repeated stuff > (see top)

Answer 1

start over...move somewhere else...get a good job, make friends with employees, be whoever you want to be

Answer 2

Tell me about it.

has this depression got a root cause. E.G bullying, work related? You siad you have been drepresed for about a year that suggests to me that the year befoue u warnt depressed so..Wot happend?? Did any thing change. E.G have u just lost a pet or a grandperant?. If u drink a lot off alcohol or do any type of drug that can result in drepression unfortunetly it then becomes a catch 22 situation.. You use the drugs cause u feel bad and it seems that the whole world is jus dandy then u come down and the world returns you need anouther fix and of course u know that your getting addictid but you just cant stop..becasue you feel so good. I am speaking from experaince I have been smoking weed for the last 10 years so far i havent sufferd with any drepression or mania or paranoyer.. I'm just addicted I know im addicted but it dosn't help matters:-) :-) if u would rather coorspond by e_mail then jus let me know and ill give u my e-mail address. I have no formal training in counceling but i have a decent understanding.. I think that you havent looked inside yourself all the answers are there all i can do is try and guide u to the questions.. That's bascliy wot psycotheripy is about. Giveing you a map and a nudge in the right direction:-)

P.S as a faver 2 me would people stop mentioning the word pills tablets or medicine.. All 2 often the act of giveing medication causes more harm then not perscribing it.. Doctors r soooooo happy 2 provide valium etc on tap.. it proberly isint needed the lst thing u need is a cocktail of man made chimicals swishing in your blood like a slush puppy!!!!!

Worm_master

Answer 3

Listen to people when they post the obvious stuff. They say it because it is common sense. Oddly people will never see a specialist unless it is a last resort, however, it sounds as if what you have tried has led you to failure at this point.

Phone your local surgery and ask for the contact details of a counsellor. If all else fails you will at least have an option when you are low.

You say you have told noone, but yet you feel you can tell us. We are total strangers. Perhaps a stranger able to give you professional advice would not be such a big step as you fear.

Tomorrow morning make that phone call. "He who moves a mountain does so by first carrying away small stones."

Answer 4

First of all, thank you for posting your question and for reaching out. Remember to pay attention to the compassionate responses and just ignore the rest.

Isolation goes hand in hand with depression. I've struggled with depression my entire life (i'm 61), and I know a lot about it from my own experience. One of the things that happens is that my energy decreases, I lose interest in other people and in activities that I once was interested in, I try to sleep all the time, hoping it will go away, but it doesn't - it just gets worse. I try to pretend that it's ok, and that doesn't help.

Depression can become a very serious problem. It can't survive so well if you will open up and tell some people that you are struggling. You're 18, so really you're still an adolescent with lots of hormonal things going on, which can contribute to or make depression much worse than it would be at another time in your life.

PLEASE TELL YOUR PARENTS, or show them what you've written here. Let them know that you just cannot find your way out of feeling this way and you feel hopeless. I truly believe that they will find a doctor for you to talk to, and someone who may provide medication for depression.

UNTIL YOU CAN FIND SOME PROFESSIONAL TO HELP YOU, REMEMBER THESE THINGS

1. Physical exercise is very helpful - even if it is just WALKING vigorously. (I know you probably won't feel like it, but over time it will help "pull you out of it."

2. Structure/Regularity. Most of us who suffer from depression often have no regular routine, and we live in disarray and chaos. See if you can get yourself to go to bed and get up at the same time every day, and to just make your bed each day (if you don't). I believe from experience that this sort of small step towards order sends a message to your subconscious. We all need regularity, structure, and beginning to provide it yourself will help you in the long run.

3. If you have a friend who is pretty mature, and who you think would listen to you, please talk about what you are going through.

4. If there's an approachable teacher or counselor at school, please let them know.

Remember this is NOT a hopeless situation, even though you may FEEL hopeless. Remember that FEELINGS ARE NOT FACTS. Feelings are energy in motion. They will change.

Reach out. People do care about you. I care. Let me know how you are doing. If you send me an email, I will answer.

All the best, from someone who knows!!

Answer 5

You're 18? - You're growing up.
You "don't know your friends and family any more"?
It could be that you are outgrowing your old perceptions.
You see everything differently now.
Your friends are changing too.
That's not necessarily a bad thing.
Do have some compassion for the faults you discover
in your friends and family. Everbody is human,
no-one is perfect.
You should talk to someone if the depression is long
standing and constant.
Probably just venting will make you feel a lot better,
and you'll surely find out you're not alone.

Answer 6

You want the best advice in the world?

Go see a doctor. Mental health can be just as important as physical health and I know that from personal experience. When people tell you to go see a doctor, it's because you have to fix something that's wrong with you. Don't just dismiss it as useless advice or lack of empathy.

Just remember that everything you're feeling right now is fake. All the symptoms you're experiencing are just side-effects of depression, and do not actually reflect REALITY. Just remember that before you do anything.

Answer 7

Depression can be a hard thing to understand at times. I know you feel that everyone is distant to you, however you need to remember that it's possible it's you that is distancing yourself from them. Which is what we do when we are depressed. The best suggestions i can give is to talk to your family and close friends and let them know whats going on with you and how your feeling. You need the extra support to get you through this. Unfortunately, i know it's not what you want to hear but there is nothing wrong with going to a therapist or getting on medications for depression. Depression can do crazy things to your mind and body, for your own well being you should reach out to your loved ones they can help.. Best of luck to you..

Answer 8

You've probably gotten the "go see a doctor" response. It sounds like you haven't been able to take that advice for whatever reason. I would say for you write your feelings, thoughts and experiences down. Take up spoken word and put your feelings out there in the universe. I did that and it helped relieve me of my anger. I didn't have money to see a pyschologist and my insurance didn't cover it so I had to find alternate ways. Talking to my friends didn't really help but writing poetry, essays and short stories helped plurge my feelings. Getting on a mic and putting my poetry out there definately helped. I found others could relate to what I was saying. If you aren't in the position to talk to someone, write write and write. It doesn't matter what you write or how well, it'll get better and it'll help. Good Luck.

Answer 9

if you could answer my question then you might be able to give yourself some good advice. i have a friend that sounds like he's going through the same exact thing as you. i still call him everyday and tell him i love him. sometimes he answers but most of the time he doesnt. i try not to take it personally. he tells me he is depressed and describes the same feelings that you have. he knows that no matter what, at the very least i'm here for him. why is he still so distant? i went through a bout myself and i realized the only way to get over it is to FORCE yourself to get out and do the things you really don't want to do. if someone invites you out and you'd rather sit in your room alone, GO OUT. it'll take some time before you start to laugh here and there but really. the only thing that can truely get you out of this is you. you have to FORCE it!

Answer 10

ok. new year new start. lets focus. do different things. Forget finding a relationship, it will happen when you are more relaxed. Priortize on yourself esteem,no 1 look after yourself, how about joining a gym, few times a week, loads people, make new friends, get fit have a steam room & jacuzzi maybe. Swim & Wlak. Socialize with your friends and family, be happier in your self, and they will feel more happy to be around you. Have fun, dont look for relationship, your 18, it doesnt matter, if your good to be around, things will all change and work out. So de-stress, calm down, be happy and work on it, bet you it works.

Answer 11

you sound as if you need to get on some medication for depression. It is worth perservering with it as it takes a wee while to get into your system. You must see a doctor. It will not go away. Take care of your health and be pro-active in getting better. This time of year is difficult with the lack of daylight sunshine, so you could have your symptoms made worse by SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). I bought a SAD lamp last winter online and its really helped me since.