Why are people like me treated differently because we are still virgins?

Question

Ok..I am 34 about 5'7 and have a nice figure and get a lot of compliments from guys about the way I look but they don't even ever ask me out or even talk to me.It's always been like that for me.When I first meet a guy,he doesn't know anything about me,so it's not like that the whole virgin thing is turning him off.They won't even give it a chance to know me.I have this good guy friend who knows about me.He says I don't know what the problem is with guys,are they blind or something!Why do I feel like I am always being avoided and people put me down because of my morals and values.Is there anyone anymore that's not going to be mean to me about it?

I am not ugly.I am attractive!!!!

Jonathon F,you didn't have to be so rude about it.Who cares!!!!!

Answer 1

I think your priceless, and sexy. Maybe what you should do is stop letting people know how much your morals means to you, because some people don't have any and they rather make you look weak then to admit that they are jealous of you. Stay strong sexy don't be so hard on yourself.

Answer 2

yes im not goin to be mean about it! i think you have a special gift, its very hard to find a girl who is still a virgin. If i was to look for a girl i would rather her still be one. I like those morals/values in a girl. Im still a virgin too...its ok ...its not a bad thing! That is not the reason u are having trouble picking up guys. U said u had a good body and were cute, its just that some people have bad luck with relationships. I am the same way, im not a bad lookin dude, but i can't seem to keep a girl. I don't know why!! Good luck though!

Answer 3

I too would treat people like you differently, only, if I knew you were virgin.Because honestly @ 34 yrs and virgin is different. I'm curious : How many people like you do you know? It's also common courtesy to give complements to people for the way they look. The way a person looks, and being attractive are two differences. You mentioned, they won't even give it a chance to get to know you. To truly know someone would take a life time. I don't know if people put you down for your morals and values......it may just be a lil strange to believe! Why people would be mean about it, I can't answer.

Answer 4

Okay, to be honest it would not bother me either way that you are a virgin. However, when I met someone once, she gave off this vibe of being a virgin for lack of a better term. Initially I was hesitant because I did not know if it was one of those situations where we would have to wait until we got married to have sex and if so, how many years could that take etc. Sorry, but life is too short to not at least no where your headed. But anyway, we hung for a while and eventually I didn't care how long it would take. Her personality won me over. Come to find out she wasn't anyway and we were together for just over ten years. It can happen but it could be a situation like that. Hope this helps a little.

Answer 5

No I treat the ones who lost their virginity at the age of 12 differently though

Answer 6

I find nothing wrong if anything ur pure and that's special. That is odd most men beg for a virgin. but I'm glad u have morals U give women a better name Thank You I didn't do so well I lost mine at 19 and to a jerk who cheated on me I always hoped to lose it to the man I'd marry but he was my first sexual experience my husband Hope u find the one good luck and don't let people knock u down

Answer 7

I understand what you mean. It's not you, nothing is wrong with you. It's society, and the values and morals that are quickly diminishing from individuals. People will be mean all the time, don't expect them to understand you, because when you expect that then you're disappointed. I say, who cares about what others say or think. Just worry about you and your GUY will come, he will. Try new scenes, where men appreciate you. Be true to yourself and tell those other people to mind their own business.

Answer 8

Let's see if I can answer this.

First of all, you're 34 years old. Put yourself the reverse role: If you were a girl (which you are), and a guy who was 36 years old was not only not married but still a virgin, the first question out of your mind would be "Okay he's cute/good looking or whatever...what's wrong with him?" From what you're telling me however, it sounds like you're having problems getting past the first date or two. Are you defensive about the virginity issue? Are you waving that around right away when you sit down to dinner?

That's the first reaction I think a typical person would have going into the situation. I think others would think (all the while making assumptions here), you're going to probably want a long courtship, or at the very least you're going to want to remain a virgin until you're married. That's difficult for a lot of guys. Sex is a really important dynamic, especially later in life. If you're 38, as I am, you have an interesting choice. Do I commit to this woman over the long term and expect all will be right for me after we're married? When you're in your thirties, someone without a sex history can be a tremendous positive or a huge negative. For a lot of guys they don't want to wait around to find out for sure. Anyone looking above the age of 35 probably doesn't want to wait around too long to find out if someone's perfect for them to head toward getting married.

Positives and Negatives:

Negative: Any guy who meets you and is considering a future with you probably realizes from the beginning you're not budging on your intention of keeping it simple and your rule of "no sex" until you're married is means they have to be certain you're going to be perfect for them from here on out. If I were looking, I'd be very concerned that your attitudes about it might not be very healthy (or even if you have fear of it), or that you'll be putting up resistance to sex after the marriage begins, or even something as simple as you might not be a very good physical lover. From where I sit, by the time I'm my age, I want a family. (Some guys don't if they're single at my age, and have never been married) However, I don't want to wait around for you to figure out what sex is all about for it to be pleasing enough for both of us. Huge negative for you and for me.

Positive: You have no sexual history. You've got devotion, you're focused, you're solid. You're probably willing to learn and to be creative about it afterwards. For all anyone knows you're a raving animal when sex enters the equation. If religion is a factor for you, that may be another plus.

I suspect however that whatever is causing the weird behavior you're getting from guys has something to do with a) the reason why you're a virgin until you're married, and b) the defensive posture you might be putting up on the first date or two toward exploration before marriage. c) I guess it could be something else entirely, and it's personality driven. Maybe you come off as a very prim, very focused individual and guys figure you won't relax at all (and I dont mean about specifically sex) throughout the relationship. Again, all conjecture, but it's something I wouldn't sit through. I won't have the patience for it, and I've always been a very patient guy, sometimes too patient.

Regardless, good luck. I hope it works out for you. I admire your persistance.

Answer 9

Hi!
Well, some guys can fell ourselves scarred with such an attitude regarding sex.
I think you have no problems, you are as you are, and maybe where you live it's a really open society, so keep virgin isn't "normal".
But in other societies, like mine, it's a good value and you would be more appreciated for many guys! ;-)

The world is really big friend! Don't change, and if you feel fine keeping your virginity, keep doing! ;-)
If they don't want to know you when they know you are still a virgin, maybe you didn't enjoy your relatinoship with them, Maybe you could travel and see other cultures where your attitude is more appreciated.
regards,

JameS

Answer 10

By the sounds of it all the guys you have met so far only want one thing! If you want to wait til you get married then that can be a good thing. Maybe you are coming over too strong and frightening them off. I find it hard to believe that every guy out there is a sleeze.

Answer 11

wow, I wish there were more people out there with your morals. I'm only 17, but I'm still a virgin. I have a lot of guys compliment me on my looks, but I never get asked either. I've just decided that eventually the right guy will come along.