What should I tell my 10 year old daughter, who's a big "Zoe 101" fan . . .?

Question

. . . about Jamie Lynn Spears? On the show, Zoe is the kind of girl who's weary about even kissing a boy. Obviously, in real life, the actress is quite different. Other than being sexually active, what about her decision to have a baby at such a young age? Should I bring this up with my daughter even if my daughter doesn't bring it up first?

Thanks everybody for your helpful answers. I can't really pick my favorite. It's interesting how there's a split in opinion about whether a parent should bring this up first with a child, or wait for the child to raise it first before discussing it. I think both of these options are fine. I actually raised the issue gently with my daughter, but she said she hadn't heard anything and didn't express much interest after I told her that Jamie Lynn Spears, the actress who played Zoe, was going to have a baby in real life. Perhaps children are better at separating fact from fiction than we give them credit for.

Answer 1

I would take this opportunity to have the "talk" with your daughter as it is not impossible that 10 year olds are sexually active (sad enough). Does your daughter understand the difference between the shows "character" and the actresses "real life"?? As long as she understands this, I think it is the perfect opportunity to talk about sex and life choices and consequences. This show is popular and no doubt this incident will be discussed at school where a lot of misinformation can happen. You should definitely bring it up to her first....maybe she can even help educate the other girls out there who are not as fortunate enough to have their parents talk to them. Good Luck!

Answer 2

I don't feel that you should purposely bring it up. I would wait to see if she hears something about it first. Then if she does...I would just say that people in real life are very different from the characters that they portray on tv. The fact that she got pregnant does not mean that she is a bad person, it just means that she wasn't taking the proper precautions. I would then talk to her and say that even though she is a great actress she mad a choice that is going to change her life forever. This may be a good time to talk about the birds and the bees and the things that can happen if your not careful. Don't protray Jaime Lynn Spears as a bad person...after all she is just a kid herself. You wouldn't want someone bashing your kid, if she was ever in the same situation. Hope this helps.

Answer 3

I had to have that discussion with my daughter just last night. I was reading the article, and the top of my screen said "PREGNANT"...and had Jamie's picture on it...My daughter said "who's pregnant? It looks like Zoe 101" I told her that it was, and she said "why is SHE pregnant, isn't she just a kid too?". I explained that yes, she IS still a kid, one who made some very bad choices. She chose to put her youth, her career, and the rest of her life, really, in jeopardy, buy getting pregnant so young. My daughter then said "well, THAT'S stupid.". I agreed. I can't say a whole lot, because I was only 17 when I had my first child...but that does give me something to show my daughter...It was rough...but I did it.

I think you should bring it up before she does, because Jamie was a role model for these younger girls, and if someone doesn't set the record straight about the choices she made not being good ones, then our daughters will emulate, and could end up in the same position.

Answer 4

We already had the talk with my fiance's 6 yr old daughter about Britney Spears being a bad parent. It's disappointing about Jamie Lynn, because she really liked Zoey 101. On the other hand, I don't agree with some of the values and generalizations being taught by that show so maybe it's best.
I would go ahead and bring it up because she's getting to an age where her peers will be talking about it anyway, and honest information is best from you.

Answer 5

10 years old... hmmm... If she brings it up or you know she's aware of the situation, I'd ask her opinion on it. Talk to her based on her thoughts. I'm not sure if she's had a sex talk yet or not. If she has, then you may want to use it as an opportunity to explain why protection and waiting until later in life is so important. Also praise Jamie Lynn for trying to do the right thing even though she made a very big mistake. Let your daughter know that sometimes people do things that are irresponsible and wrong, but that its up to us to try to make things right in the face of our wrongdoing. You may also want to touch on how characters on tv are just that -- made up fictional characters. Explain that people's personalities in real-life often differ from who they portray.

Answer 6

She is probably going to hear about it somewhere. It has been on the news already and will get big play in the magazines. It depends on how mature your 10 year old is...I think the big issue would be discussing the difference between someone's TV personality and the actress herself. Before I started explaining everything though, I would ask her what she thinks about Jamie being pregnant. And aren't we all glad that Mama Spear's parenting book has been shelved??

Answer 7

I'd bring it up. Your 10 year old daughter has probably heard about it a million times in school all ready. Tell your daughter your opinion, good or bad and then get your daughter to give her opinion. At least it's a good way to get a conversation going with your daughter. Discuss the pros and cons of the whole situation. You'll probably be surprised at your daughter's thoughts on the whole thing.

Answer 8

No. A lot of times young kids don't notice the headlines on things like this.
I would just not say anything unless she somehow hears of it and asks.
And if so, explain to her that characters are often not the same as the actors who play them. Surely she can understand this.
Explain to her that every actor has their own personal life outside of the TV show, and that in her personal life she is having a baby.
Don't go into further detail about it - ex. premartial sex, etc. - as most young kids don't correlate this just yet with society's label of "wrong"...
Just say something like, "she's going to be extra busy now with a TV show and a baby to take care of, but I bet her mom and her sister will help her out."
I mean, to a 10 year old you just can't really get too much more in depth.
The other posters say this is a good oppurtunity to have "the talk" but honestly, if it were my daughter, I would wait until she was a couple of years older to have that conversation....

Answer 9

I think it was a very poor choice on her behalf, and that for a 16 year old in the public eye to say she "decided to have a baby" like it's no big deal is so irresponsible it's pathetic! I was upset when I heard this because of the parents in your shoes... what do you tell your children to make it clear to them that while their idol is having a child at 16, it is not okay for them to????
I don't know what to tell you on how to handle it, but I would probably explain to my child that she is pregnant and that it is not correct, and go on to explain what a baby entails, though she is ten and I don't know that six years from now that will affect her.

Answer 10

I would bring up the conversation and not wait for her to ask questions...she just may be too shy to ask but may actually have a lot of questions or opinions about it. It is better to discuss these things openly. By not talking about it doens't make it go away.