My wife is Jewish and I am Christian. When we married 3 years ago she asked that we not have a tree unless my children were going to be at our home on Christmas. This year my kids are coming and I said lets put up the tree. She said no, that it made her uncomfortable and she was worried about how her kids would react (they are 18, 21 and 25).
We had a bit of an argument over her reaction and she finally agreed to put up the tree - begrudgingly. After having to argue about it, I told her it was not important and I did not want the tree up. She forced the issue. As we were putting up the tree - she again got nervous and wanted to make sure there would not be any crosses on the tree. I got pretty upset that I had offered to let this whole thing go and not put up a tree and she pushed on it. At the end of the day she could not get comfortable with the concept of the tree in the house.
Was I wrong to argue about this? What experiences have others had with this situation?
2007-12-19 03:23:16 · 10 answers · asked by trement ave 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Honestly.. you handled it badly. Very badly, but you are NOT in the wrong here. Neither of you is "wrong".
She is extremely uncomfortable with what she views as a Christian tradition. You need to talk to her about it, what it means to you, and that you're not trying to push your religion onto her.
And you need to reciprocate, share in each other's traditions. Together.
She's your wife, and you are her husband. You need to be more understanding of each other, in a two way street kind of way.
2007-12-19 03:39:52 · answer #1 · answered by Kevin M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is more important, a Christmas tree or your marriage? There are many places in the world where Christmas is celebrated without a tree. I am not suggesting that you compromise your faith in any way, but sometimes you have to go along to get along. The Christmas season is a very difficult time for Jewish people living in a Christian country.
God's blessings on you both.
2007-12-19 04:06:38 · answer #2 · answered by Bibs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trees are pretty, and your kids are adults. You should get to have a tree at least every other year. I'm sure you've had more than your share of disagreements and compromises over the course of your marriage, much more important than this, and I'm sure you can work this one out too. I'm also going to guess by the ages of your kids that your wife is at least mid-40's? We start acting a little weird around that age and older; that might be a mitigating factor.
2007-12-19 03:32:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to compromise. See if she would be confortable with a small tree. If you are willing to deal with some of her believes then she should be willing to deal with some of yours.
By the way, did you know that the Christmas tree has pagan origins? (Didn't you ever wonder what chopping down a live tree and decorating it within your home has to do with the birth of Christ???) Druids believed in nature over deity and often worshipped trees as symbols of their faith. In an attempt to convert them, Christians would decorate their trees with Christian emblems and symbols so that when the druid would try to worship the tree they would also be worshipping the Christian symbology. In the end the christmas tree is an effort to compromise between druids and Christianity.
2007-12-19 03:30:21 · answer #4 · answered by Rance D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Christians celebrate the delivery of Christ and luxuriate in too the trip era as presented by potential of Queen Victoria who inspired the pagan creation of Christmas wood. whilst Christians do no longer settle for the will or the relevance of wood some Christians stay in a kin environment the place there are consistent with possibility no different Christians of their kin so of course some have a tree yet no longer for any non secular purpose fairly to connect contained in the festivities..
2016-11-04 01:11:33 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, she agreed when you were married to put up a tree if your children were going to spend Christmas with you. They are. She has no place to complain or argue.
And I'm sorry, her children are WELL old enough to respect you putting up a sign of your faith when YOUR children are coming over to spend Christmas with you. If she didn't raise them to be tolerant, then that's her problem.
You had such a right to argue this. I would have, too.
)O(
2007-12-19 03:30:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the tree is a pagan symbol representing an erect male sex organ... it's as much non-jewish as it is non-christian.
What about a burning bush instead?
If your wife is really so fervently Jewish, what's she doing being married to a Gentile?
2007-12-19 03:28:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why is she so geeked out by the tree? It's not christian in origin anyway.
2007-12-19 03:27:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
actually taking your question seriously, christians shouldn't put trees in their houses either. mostly because it is pagan and God says not to worship Him the way pagans worship their gods.
2007-12-19 03:39:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i suggest throwing it into the yard, and setting it on fire. Then ask, which car she wants after the divorce.
2007-12-19 03:28:45 · answer #10 · answered by blah 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋