I can't do this mo more. Yes my husabnd helps with odds and end as he can, but honestly there is much he can't or sometimes even just won'd do even when I need is help The house, the kids, the newspaper rooutes, the booking keeping is all thrown on me, and no matter what I do it is not ever enough. It is always about what they want. I have no family here, I don't have no friend circles nearby because I am always having to take care of everything here. The house the kids, the kids school stuff, taking care of him, never knowing when he may or may not explode at me and it always my fault. I am always the one blowing things out of proportion, byt I do the work of 3 people in the house and that is not excluding my other job. I have no support from my family, my mom was never really there, and defianetly isn't now and I am expected to keep up esperinces for his family. I don't know how much longer I can do this. Everyday I feel myself going deeper and deeper.
2007-12-19 02:50:52 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
I need someone who want tell me just that they'll do this or that, but have it done in more than three days or a week. I am so tired and carring the responsibilities of three adults. I don't know how much longer I can mentally hold out. I have tried to start a new hobby but there is literally not enough time, and now I am expected to entertain his father and step-mother for new years, neither of which wanted to come, but his siter decided to say we'll be more than happy to see to their comfort. I can't do this alone and I have no help, and if I speak up I'm wrong and being a *****. What do I do, I am bordering on being admittable to the pysch ward. HHelp, please! Someone, my brain is frying on me and my heart is too tired
2007-12-19 02:56:57 · update #1
I would LOVE a vacation but the money isn't there even for a day spa, and unless I can carry a baby along, which the ones around here don't allow them. He is a epileptic heartpatient and his health is really ill at the moment, but his family chooses to ignore it until he's in a hospital for a week. CAring for him is like caring for 2 kids someimtes.
2007-12-19 03:03:08 · update #2
Wow it sounds like you are really on the edge! Too much to do, isolated, with no family's help and no friends, and a husband that explodes when you complain. You sound totally overwhelmed with house, kids, newspaper routes and everything. First of all don't complain. It just makes things worse even when it is totally justified. Don't develop the martyr attitude either. Make a list of what you want to get done and do things one at a time. Add time in for your own relaxation and rest. Concentrate on the things that are good and wonderful in life and things will get better. A free source that may help is flylady.com
2007-12-19 03:14:33 · answer #1 · answered by Iowa Woman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to your husband about this? I have been seeing a counselor b/c I've been feeling overwhelmed and it's helped tremendously. You are going to have to set some time aside for yourself or you will go nuts. Are there any tasks you can get rid of w/out much penatly? Try to weed out what is volunteer and learn to say NO!!! It's hard for people like us that do everything, but it's going to save your sanity in the long run..and think you're husband doesn't have a problem saying no.
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #2 · answered by *~Cam's Mommy ~* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have a long talk with your husband and tell him about all the stress you are going through. Ask him for help. Demand his help if that works better. Also when you can, take a little vacation. Even if it is just for the day to a local spa. I know its hard but you will get through it.
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #3 · answered by dgizrobin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really think that you should sit down and talk to your husband before you get in too deep. If you honestly tell him how you feel, he should step up and be willing to help you out, he is you husband, and that is supposed to be why you married each other. What is the worst that can come from asking for help? Maybe he doesn't know how you feel, or he thinks that whatever you are going through is a phase. Men don't know, us women have to tell them. So speak up! Ask for help before it's too late!
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cant believe what i just read. It felt like i was reading my life story except for the infant. I think you may have a touch of depression, justifiably so i might add. Everyone i talk to tell me that there husbands blame them for everythng. I dont know if that is true. But did u know that my 21 year old son missed his NAMI meeting yesterday and it was my fault. I went to my family doctor and he game me zoloft. I seem to be getting better but ur situation sounds like mine a few weeks back. Good luck and Merry Christmas
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So who steps up when you do burn out? Stop trying to be SUPER WOMEN. Stop thinking you can do it all. You are only 1 person. Find a old friend and visit, you can come to my house and vent. I have a shoulder you can cry on. You need ME time. I live in Florida, I'll take you to the beach. You are NOT being selfish, your asking for help before it's to late. Reach out, there are plenty of people who will help you.
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #6 · answered by cooter726 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if you are suffering from depression.
Medication and counseling can help but what you are talking about has more to do with the feeling of life being a little bit overwhelming.
I think it would be wise and healthy if you could take a short vacation.
Good luck
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well umm you need to relax thats one thing for sure but where ? ?
what ever you do dont make bad things worse dont turn into alchool
dont let the guy explode at you he cant hit you
and if he dosent like the way you do things tell him to do them you have to be strong
i know on what he is doing is some kind of abuse but i forgot i know theres a place were they will be able to help you out
i am sorry i cant help you alot but just hang on the kids will be old soon and you would worry less about them
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #8 · answered by Felipe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talking won't help you need to put your foot down and tell them this is the way it will be from now on, anything else their looking for is on them. If you encourage this type of behavior it will continue. Why should what you want be any less important than their wants. Take some time for just you on a regular basis.
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #9 · answered by Kelly R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is a forum where people get help and help each other with problems like you have described.
http://www.bpkids.org/site/PageServer?pagename=lrn_about
2007-12-23 09:48:50 · answer #10 · answered by storm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋