like its not my fault i was adopted, i was an only child my parents got divorced!!!!! no the wonder all the so called normal ppl think we are weirdos!!!! show them we are strong and normal regardless of our up bringing!!!! you are who you make yourself in this life !
2007-12-19 00:15:10 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I make no excuses, I am what I am which is what I want to be.
If you don't like it pi$$ off.
And I've had my share of hard knocks and bad luck.
If you've got anything about you then you pick yourself up and get on with life.
2007-12-19 00:19:20 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
People are what they are, usually, due partly (some more than others, vica versa) to their History.
Naturally, some individual are able to mold their lives positively,even gaining knowledge, from the negative input received from Birth.
Sometimes the damage to Children caused by their 'Parents'/'Guardians', can be so cruel, so unbelievable, that when the Child matures (if ever), unfortunately they are not
able to enjoy the luxury of living a 'normal' life,
'you are who you make yourself in this life !' you state.....
Hypothetically, let us pretend your Mother was an 'Heroin User'/'Alcoholic'/ 'Junky'/'whatever', and she got pregnant by some guy and had you...... Would you still be able to state the same?
That is only the tip of the iceberg...
You need to do much research on cruelty to Children and the effects that it has.... let alone the scars!
Get off your soap box ....and open your eyes!
2007-12-19 03:56:32 · answer #2 · answered by susan8589 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Actually, we don't ALL have it in us to change. Some people are so damaged in infancy that it affects their brain development. Early infant development creates our blueprints for relationship and behavior in adulthood. Sometimes the damage can be overcome or managed with help. Sometimes, it just can't.
There is also a huge difference between making excuses and facing one's issues. If a person has issues that need to be resolved, they will not get them resolved by pretending they aren't there.
As Robert Frost said, "The only way around is THROUGH." If people don't face their issues and work through them, they will NEVER be able to live a healthy and productive life. Instead, they will just muddle through a shallow life, and never learn anything from their own experiences that might help themselves and others.
2007-12-19 02:42:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 11⤊ 0⤋
It's true that we 'are who we make ourselves' to be, but it's also true that not everyone starts in the same place.
Being adopted and having divorced parents is difficult, and would be for ANYONE.
As another poster mentioned 'there are worse things than being adopted' is true, but you can always come up with something 'worse' in ANY given situation. But pretending sadness and frustration do not exist is not emotionally healthy behavior.
The ONLY way we become successful adults is to face our issues, adopted or not.
I don't think you would be here, asking this question if you were feeling understood. If you'd like some answers for how you're feeling, and validation for your authentic feelings come here and poke around:
http://www.adultadoptees.org/forum
Anyone who tells you that you shouldn't feel a certain way doesn't have your best interest at heart. Steer clear.
2007-12-19 01:58:11 · answer #4 · answered by Sunny 7 · 14⤊ 1⤋
WHAT PHIL SAID.
The fact that I think adoption needs reform, and that I've had some extra problems in spite of my good adoption, has not kept me from living life.
It didn't stop me from getting married. It didn't keep me from getting a divorce when the time was right for that either. It didn't stop me from being a veterinary assistant for ten years and saving lives. It didn't stop me from doing animal rescue. It didn't stop me from becoming a published poet and fiction author. It didn't stop me from getting my master's degree at age 38.
I'm not an only child and my parents didn't divorce, so I can't speak to that.
Who "always makes excuses"?
2007-12-19 03:05:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 9⤊ 0⤋
More "sit down and shut up" claptrap. What threatens you about adoptees speaking up? Why do you think we shouldn't talk about the problems with adoption? You are obviously threatened by us, but I wonder why?
I have made no excuses for anything. I'm trying to share my story. I don't want excuses, and I don't want pity. I want people who are so starry-eyed about adoption to listen to adoptees instead of ignoring us. I want my full civil rights.
If you have nothing to contribute to the conversation except to tell people to be quiet, then I don't understand what you are doing here.
2007-12-19 01:47:00 · answer #6 · answered by blank stare 6 · 12⤊ 1⤋
Hey you are getting hassle for being adopted? That is so off. Merry Christmas to you xxxxxx
2007-12-19 00:20:36 · answer #7 · answered by **** 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Everybody has issues whether they're adopted, the product of a broken home or whatever
If some people have issues about certain events in their life it doesn''t necessarily mean that they aren't leading a productive well-balanced life so perhaps you ought to stop judging other people and deal with your own issues
2007-12-19 01:39:10 · answer #8 · answered by H****** 7 · 13⤊ 1⤋
i get what your saying but alot of bad things happen to people so you have got to show some sensitivity.some people chose to play the victim and others believe life is what you make it,it depends what sort of person you are not everybody is strong willed and head strong and i think if you are your very lucky.
2007-12-19 00:21:37 · answer #9 · answered by skin 2 · 4⤊ 2⤋
People make excuses because they don't want to take personal responsibility. We all have it in us to change no matter a person's background. If we had a bad childhood then as adults we bear the responsibility of getting help for ourselves. If people don't do that then they turn to excuses to exonerate themselves from responsibility. Sad but true.
2007-12-19 00:22:45 · answer #10 · answered by Choqs 6 · 1⤊ 7⤋