this is our second marriage. this time around i think because we didn't have the pressures of raising children, they are all adults, our finacial situation is much stronger, we are retired so don't have employment issues, and we are a lot more laid back. of course being soulmates really helps. we really did save the best for last, we live, laugh, dream and love together. we have clocked up almost 14 yrs, and our respect, compassion, and our desire to share the rest of our lives together grows stronger and stronger.
2007-12-18 22:27:01 · 26 answers · asked by ⓑⓐⓨⓢⓐ ™ 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
In my career as a nurse, I have had the honor of meeting many couples married 50,60 and 70 years. Being a survivor of 2 divorces I was always curious about how they stayed together so long so I would ask them to tell me their secret. Every one of those couples told me basically the same thing. Compromise.
My 26 year old daughter recently got married. I passed this advice on to her and her husband.
2007-12-19 13:14:52 · answer #1 · answered by iddybiddykiddy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you've got it sussed already! The fact that you have the desire to share the rest of your lives together etc grows stronger you probably will. We made a pact with each other that we would have good lines of communication and never argue which we have kept that through some very rough times during the past 19yrs that we've been married. We discuss all purchases for the home and neither of us have gone and bought something that was decided against buying. We wish you both all the best in your life together and beyond. xx
2007-12-18 23:50:47 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow! This sounds so much like us! I agree with all you've said. Sometimes I feel really sad that we don't have the history of having and raising children together, but we do have the benefits you mentioned, and I know that I don't get hung up on the kinds of things that used to bother me. I feel as if I won big in the "Love lottery". For years I said that our marriage was so great because my husband was perfect, but now I realize it is great because he is NOT perfect, and I know it, and I love him anyway! (Also because he always just says, "Yes, Dear".)
2007-12-19 12:36:32 · answer #3 · answered by Mountain Girl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that communication and religion have a lot to do with a healthy relationship. Without either, I think, the relationship could have fault lines already. Glad to hear that you enjoy each other. My wife is my best friend and it has helped our relationshp tremendisly. Communication is more important than what most people give it credit for, for without it nothing can be accomplished!
2007-12-18 22:41:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Beats me!!!!
I did it twice; first marriage gave me 2 beautiful children and a child for a husband. Second marriage brought me the love of my life, a wonderful husband and step-father. He only had one problem.....with his zipper.
Each lasted 11 years....
I've been gloriously single now since 1981 (by choice, thank you) and find that is my niche.
I figure if I ever get the "urge" again, we'll live together 11 years...then if it still has the buzz we'll marry......HA!!
2007-12-19 04:51:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think starting out as friends. I raised my sons with this piece of advice. Make sure you are friends before you are lovers. Sex is not something to base a relationship on. When the road gets rough, it's nice to have a best friend beside you. Also, HUMOR! You have to be able to just bust out laughing over stupid stuff.
2007-12-18 23:43:15 · answer #6 · answered by janice 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sense of humour, we have had some very hard times, but still smiling, but you have to work on it, only get back what you out in, marriage does not just work, we have to work together to keep that bond strong, married 22 years with one 16 year old daughter.
2007-12-18 23:36:30 · answer #7 · answered by Little miss naughty 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Perseverance even in the face of what may seem like the time to give it all up. Life and marriage are a series of hills, valleys and plains.
RESPECT
Having the ability to communicate!
Knowing the difference between RELATIONSHIP AND LOVE vs Lust and selfishness.
2007-12-18 22:36:27 · answer #8 · answered by sage seeker 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Never go to bed angry..one of you might wake up dead and think of the guilt trip that would put on the other..don't sweat the small stuff, trust, humor and friendship..Has worked for us. We celebrate our 50th anniversary in Jan..now that is a long time..
2007-12-19 12:12:43 · answer #9 · answered by jst4pat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for 32 years and we are still very much in love. What has made our relationship last? Communication, recognizing each other's "hot buttons" and avoiding them, not taking ourselves too seriously, laughter, being each other's best friends and lots and lots of hot sex.
2007-12-19 00:10:08 · answer #10 · answered by jersey girl in exile 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋