We'd been separated for about 2 mo, I was fixing myself, and we were spending time on the weekends. There were a few mistakes, but for the most part everything was going as good as it could. She said that I had 1 chance and we'd get back together so long as I fixed myself, and on that I was doing everything I possibly could to make things right.
We'd made love many times during the separation, and it felt like when we first got together, like a fresh start. Then I noticed that she wasn't as affectionate, distant, as if she wasn't in love with me anymore. So I asked her about it. She acknowledged how she'd been acting and needed some time to think about it.
Earlier tonight she said we are finished. That it's possible to get back together someday, but that she mite date others in the meantime. It broke my heart, we have a 2yr old child, and I have been doing everything she wanted. Imagining her with another guy is unbearable. I'll do ANYTHING to get her back. I need some help!
2007-12-18 22:08:59 · 5 answers · asked by siforek 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
By no means is she putting everything on me. There's things she needs to work on as well. We're been together for 5 years now, we were engaged. I will fight for her back until my last breath, I'm not moving on! I know if we can recover from this our relationship will be unbreakable, it's just getting to that point that's the problem.
So far I've figured out that I need to stand tall on my own, give her time to miss me, and let her remember all the good times.
I'll wait as long as it takes to get her back. It's just the "dating other guys" thing that's got me so upset. Making love was always so special to us, and the thought of her with another guy breaks my heart.
2007-12-18 22:48:17 · update #1
I start counseling tomorrow, but at this point we're broken up, so asking her to join me is out of the question.
I do need to fix myself. I'm in pretty bad shape. I've had severe depression all my life. She was my cure. Seriously, as soon as we got together I magically stopped contemplating suicide, became more productive, and "bloomed" as my family said.
2007-12-18 22:54:12 · update #2
you are on the right track by seeking counseling. she was never the cure to your depression. you were so in love with her that you had something else to think about than sit around and think about the depression. the depression never went away it just laid low to such time as this. get yourself together mentally, emotionally, for good than you will see the bigger picture and it wont include her as much as you thought. you have a child that you need to be in love with as far as her/his welfare. you will be fine she is not the ANSWER to your problems YOU ARE. GodBless
2007-12-18 23:16:08 · answer #1 · answered by Crystal G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you need to "fix yourself"? You should not have to do everything she wants unless it is something you want to do. In that case you would have already been doing it. Maybe you are just going through the motion to get your neck out of the noose. If a partner is just going through the motion, the other can feel it. If either one just needs a heads up that they are a little off the path of happy home land that's one thing. Having to be a certain way or you are finished is no way to live. Sounds like you two should seek counseling.
2007-12-19 06:26:54 · answer #2 · answered by joeys_mom8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
fix yourself? Relationships involve two people therefor two people required to make effort. She is on a power play and used you under false hopes until she found a better offer. Sounds like she has found that offer but is only testing the waters and keeping you on the sideline for now in case it fails. Fix yourself yes indeed fix how long you are going to be used in such a way. Seek counselling for the damage this emotional rollercoster has done and move on
2007-12-19 06:20:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, when a thing is broken, it is impossible to fix it. Unless both parties are working at it, it is one of those impossible things. The best thing to do, is do what is best for the child. Take the child as much as you possibly can, and let her move on. You will beat your head up against a brick wall if you fight it.
2007-12-19 06:23:24 · answer #4 · answered by LIPPIE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you seem to be level headed i think everything will work out in the end good luck x
2007-12-19 08:16:18 · answer #5 · answered by sarah71397 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋