why parents are not understanding? didn't they used to be teenagers too?

Answer 1

I understand your perspective, but parents have a slightly different agenda to that of their teenage kids. They want to protect you and set you up for a comfortable and happy adult life, but there is more to it that this.

Teenagers don't have the life experience that older people do. Parents may prevent you doing something because they can see where it may lead when the teenager can't. This is precisely because they DO remember being a teenager.

Yes, there are parents who shove their own world views down their kids throats and don't let them live a life. Of course, making your own mistakes and learning from them is part of growing up, and teenagers must be allowed a certain amount of freedom of choice. However, it's not really a case of parents not understanding. They just have a different view on things, and sometimes it's worth listening to what they have to say. I'm not going to tell you that parents are always right. Far from it. They're only human. But even if they seem completely out of touch, they might actually be hitting on some truths every now and then.

I'm 27, and I'll be honest: no-one really likes being a teenager while it's actually happening. You're certainly not a kid anymore, but you're not quite an adult, and coupled with school and social pressures it can be an unhappy and frustrating time. But in a few years it will all come to an end and you'll be able to to do what you like. I hated being a teenager, but, in hindsight, I have some very fond memories.

Being a teenager is a bit like having your teeth drilled. It's horrible at the time, but after a while you're glad you put yourself through it.

Answer 2

Parents see things from 2 perspectives that you can't.

First: they have the benefit of hindsight. They have time and experience from which to look back at their teenage years and that changes the way they see the decisions they made at that time.

Second: they have the perspective of a parent. This means they will have an attitude of protecting you from making the same mistakes they made and trying to teach you some sort of life lesson that will help you make better decisions for yourself.

Parents also forget. When we're older it's easy to forget some of the things that we thought were important when we were younger.

They also have different priorities. Your top priority might be getting laid when you next hang out with your girl. Their top priority might be getting you to graduate from school and go to a good college and get a good job. (Just an example)

Try to remember that your parents want what's best for you and that they have more experience and may recognize a consequence of your actions that you don't see. You should at least TRY to give them the benefit of the doubt and listen to what they have to say. You might find some of it useful.

Answer 3

Yes parents have been teenagers but in a different age of the teenagers now. Time has moved on but still there are nonoes that a teenager doesn't do and is not acceptable regardless of the time and era. Your parents survived their teenage years because of their parent control and they want you to survive in your teenage years. Is that so much to ask for? If your parents didn't love you then they would ignore what you do. It's a bit** to be loved so much isn't it? But their attention to you will follow to the attention you give to your teenagers. History repeats itself. Live with it and be appreciative that your parents care and love you. It's called FAMILY TIES.

Answer 4

Yes parents were teens in a different era, this has been true since time began, but the fundamentals have not changed and that is why parents are correct more often than they are not when it comes to guiding their children.

I tell my kids that I have already been their age, but they have not been mine...so who is likely to have the better understanding? I had my own parent's issues to deal with in an era I didn't feel they understood, and I discovered the hard way that they were right most of the time. My parents were not interested in taking my fun away, they were interested in getting me to adulthood in one piece with some life skills, a minimum of baggage, and hopefully an education to get me through my next stages of life. I didn't listen and am now approaching middle age still dealing with the baggage I heaped upon myself at a young age.

Do you need to touch a fire to see if it's hot or do you trust your parent's judgment and the fact that they out of the whole world are the only ones who 100% have your back? Does the "fire" burn differently just because of the era you were born, or does teen pregnancy, drug use, gangs, violence, dropping out, etc., happen in every generation?

You will discover, as we all do, that parents all over the world and throughout time have and will continue to try to protect our children from harm the world may do them, and the harm they unwittingly will do to themselves without guidance. I wish you luck in your life and with protecting your own children to come.

Answer 5

i think for me as a parent, i do understand but that is because the lines of communication are open. i do believe that there are too many parents out there that do not listen to there kids they are set in their ways and you can't tell them any different. i know that is how my parents were communication did not exist in my home as a kid. that is why i do listen and sometimes,
like i did ,kids need to learn from there parents mistakes along with there own. and visa versa do not misunderstand the fact that most parents want to protect their kids but at the same time if kids do not make mistakes or see them made they can not learn from them parents need to give their kids choices to some degree or they can not mature into adult hood adults have to make choices everyday but how can an adult make good choices when he wasn't given the opportunity to make choices as a child give them choices and talk to them about consequences to those choices but don't always make the choices for them

Answer 6

Yes, but people get it in their minds that things should be a certain way. If you don't react like they would they think it's wrong. Plus, they had so many years of directing your life, they think they should still do it. If they are caring parents then they think they are protecting you, and doing things for your own good. It's hard for them to realize that their child is their own person who should have room to make mistakes, discover things for themselves, make their own decisions. Many parents treat their children like kids for the rest of their lives. They just can't make that switch. Try to understand them too. I hope they will come to understand you in time.

Answer 7

They understand completely. They have been there and done that. You'll understand that when you're a parent, or become mature enough to realize that most parents really do want the best for their kids. If that's the worst of your problems... then be happy. Most kids without parents would kill to have someone who cared about what they do, or to have someone that would worry about them.

Answer 8

The trouble with parents is that they were teenagers too and they've lived through it. They're trying to save you some of the pain they experienced, even though you think they were born aged 40. Even though they seem unreasonable to you, try to remember that everything they do is because they love you and they really are trying to save you some pain; they're hoping you can learn from their experience.

Answer 9

Yes they were Teenagers and they do understand.. That's why they do and say the things they do.. They have been there and actually do know better most of the time..

Answer 10

It's because they understand all too well what teenagers do because they were teenagers once too.
So are you really asking, "Why are my parents holding out on me by not letting me do what I want?"
I really am not sure is why I am asking.
Doodad