How do you let someone go?

Question

There is someone in my life who I once considered a true friend. Recently however, she's become very destructive and bitter. She's encouraged me to cheat, told my fiance I'm going to cheat on him, tried to me convince that he's cheating or will, start rumors about him that almost got him bashed and basically caused all manner of trouble. She's used and abused me, tried to manipulate me and she's zapping the life out of me. She gives me bogus relationship advice, puts my fiance down and pushes me around.

I understand why she's bitter as she's miscarried three times this year, her relationship's on the rocks and her life is in shreds. But she's taking it out on me.

I've been there for her 24/7 (literally) but I can't handle her destructiveness anymore. She's texting me as I write this, demanding to know why I haven't called her in the last week or so. "Don't you love me anymore"

I feel so guilty turning my back on her. What the heck do I do?

Answer 1

You still have her around? I kept my best friend of 27 years around because we were JW's and pioneers together when we were younger.

My (friend) eventually abused my child...Let this non friend go. I understand that you have lost a lot....do not hang on to what is poisonous for the sake of sentimentality. You are starting a life with your man. and you need to be adult enough to remove what is unhealthy from your life. You will have to do it when you have children....



I will e mail you the letter that I wrote to my ex friend....you will get the gist of the letter, all though it Will not apply to you......God Bless U.L.

Answer 2

That's a hard one and a difficult decision for you to make, however you have to put yourself first. If you continue on the same path your walking with your friend not only will your friend continue to behave the way she does but she will tear you completely down with her.
It's one thing to be supportive and want to help her, believe me, I've been there. You need to keep in mind that you cannot help someone that doesn't want to help them self.
I'm sorry to hear about her three miscarriages, that's an awful thing for anyone to go thru even once, she needs a doctor more then a friend at this point in her life. You probably won't be able to just ignore her and hope she goes away though because more likely then not, she won't. She'll become more angry and more bitter and maybe even more hostile. You need to tell her how you're feeling and make it clear to her that you need to put some space between the two of you.
I truly hope everything works out for both you and your friend.

Answer 3

I 'm sorry but she is crazy. Sound like sh is jealous about your relationship that is why she is causing all this drama. Don't feel guilty feel safe because from how the way she is acting if you tell her you all can't no longer be friends you may have to leave town or get an restraining order on her. He life is miserable and she is making yours the same get away from her think about your feelings first yourself come first before any friend THINK ABOUT IT!!!

Answer 4

Print out what you wrote here and give it to her. Splurge on a stamp and mail it to her. You're pretty easy to lead around, and it doesn't seem like you care for face to face confrontation. A friend wouldn't do or say the things this person has. Nip it in the bud.

Answer 5

I wouldn't call someone who treats you like this a friend at all. You shouldn't feel guilty for ending this association, it is destructive and emotionally trying for you.

Answer 6

It is time for her to stand on her own. Text her what you have put down here and let her know you are moving on. She will survive and the only way she is going help herself is for her not to have you as a safety net. Let her go and try not to worry about her. We are all responsible for our own lives.

Answer 7

cut your losses,there comes a time when you have to draw a line in the sand.no more!i can't take the negativity,give me some space please.,or something to that effect.