George Bush, Albert Einstein and Pablo Picasso have all died. Due to a glitch in the celestial time-space continuum, all three arrive at the Pearly Gates more or less simultaneously, even though their deaths have taken place decades apart. The first to present himself to Saint Peter is Einstein. Saint Peter questions him.
"You look like Einstein, but you have no idea the lengths certain people will go to, to sneak into Heaven under false pretenses. Can you prove who you really are?"
Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, "Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?" Saint Peter complies with a snap of his fingers. The blackboard and chalk instantly appear.
Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his special theory of relativity. Saint Peter is suitably impressed.
"You really are Einstein! Welcome to heaven!"
The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again Saint Peter asks for his credentials. Picasso doesn't hesitate. "Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?" Saint Peter says, "Go ahead."
Picasso erases Einstein's scribbles and proceeds to sketch out a truly stunning mural. Bulls, satyrs, nude women: he captures their essences with but a few strokes of the chalk. Saint Peter claps.
"Surely you are the great artist you claim to be! Come on in!"
The last to arrive is George Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head. "Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?"
Bush looks bewildered, "Who are Einstein and Picasso?"
Saint Peter sighs, "Come on in, George."
2007-12-18 10:30:09 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
ROTFLMAO
2007-12-18 10:36:02 · answer #1 · answered by Army mom 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol funny I'll star it, I got a couple here too, they are long but funny.
Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, "Heaven's getting pretty close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly horrible deaths. So what's your story?"
So the first man replies: "Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I came into my 25th floor apartment, I could tell something was wrong, but all my searching around didn't reveal where this other guy could have been hiding. Finally, I went out to the balcony, and sure enough, there was this man hanging off the railing, 25 floors above ground! By now I was really mad, so I started beating on him and kicking him, but wouldn't you know it, he wouldn't fall off. So finally I went back into my apartment and got a hammer and starting hammering on his fingers. Of course, he couldn't stand that for long, so he let go and fell -- but even after 25 stories, he fell into the bushes, stunned but okay. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I ran into the kitchen, grabbed the fridge and threw it over the edge where it landed on him, killing him instantly. But all the stress and anger got to me, and I had a heart attack and died there on the balcony."
"That sounds like a pretty bad day to me," said Peter, and let the man in.
The second man comes up and Peter explains to him about heaven being full, and again asks for his story.
"It's been a very strange day. You see, I live on the 26th floor of my apartment building, and every morning I do my exercises out on my balcony. Well, this morning I must have slipped or something, because I fell over the edge. But I got lucky, and caught the railing of the balcony on the floor below me. I knew I couldn't hang on for very long, when suddenly this man burst out onto the balcony. I thought for sure I was saved, when he started beating on me and kicking me. I held on the best I could until he ran into the apartment and grabbed a hammer and started pounding on my hands. Finally I just let go, but again I got lucky and fell into the bushes below, stunned but all right. Just when I was thinking I was going to be okay, this refrigerator comes falling out of the sky and crushes me instantly, and now I'm here."
Once again, Peter had to concede that that sounded like a pretty horrible death.
The third man came to the front of the line, and again Peter explained that heaven was full and asked for his story.
"Picture this," says the third man, "I'm hiding inside a refrigerator..."
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lol I like that one I don't care if anyone else does but I do.
2007-12-18 13:17:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
L OL 9/10 x
2007-12-18 10:35:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Loved it 9/10
Only gave 9 because i have never heard a perfect 10 joke.
2007-12-18 10:34:53 · answer #4 · answered by DreadSmurf 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes ! Its Hello - As*hole !!! That was a good imaginative Joke !!! I liked the way it was conceived and presented !!
2016-05-24 22:57:19 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny,
2007-12-18 10:37:21 · answer #6 · answered by Lolitta 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL
nice
:D
starred
2007-12-18 10:33:54 · answer #7 · answered by ThePoloHole 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
lmao
2007-12-18 10:37:11 · answer #8 · answered by Michael D 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
didn't take the time 2 read all the details
2007-12-18 10:32:56 · answer #9 · answered by xhoplessx27 3 · 1⤊ 4⤋
thats kind of funny. and i actually get it.!hahahahz
2007-12-18 10:34:28 · answer #10 · answered by Lizz 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
hee hee
2007-12-18 10:34:43 · answer #11 · answered by ipodlady231 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋