Im a sociable person and met a guy on a course i thought would be just a casual aquentence. Im straight btw. He always texts even though i dont text him and phones if i dont reply. A while ago the texting was like 5 times a day and started to scare me. Thats went down a lot now after i just stopped replying. Although now he has found out, from another source, where i live. The course that we attended stored our CV's on file and he went and looked at it. Unless you lived here you wouldnt know there was a hotel at the end. Its really tiny. He was asking the other day 'how far do you live from the hotel?'. He lives miles away and his excuse for being there just didnt add up. He lies to everyone it seems. I recently started adding things together and its like he lives in a fantasy land. He's like 'your an amature compared to me' and all this crap. His sister even phones me. I just dont want it getting out of control. What would you even call this situation? Forgive my spelling.
2007-12-18 01:30:20 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
That's pretty scary to be honest. You're not being an a*s for not wanting to talk to him. The texts would freak me out a bit - but finding out where you live is really out of line.
I would actually confront him and you can do it one of two ways depending on whether you actually like him or not. If you don't actually like him and don't want him as a friend, just text him and be blunt with him. Take this piss of him a bit if you have to - just to show him in no unclear terms that you are not into him as a friend, or as anything more. Say something like "what, are you in love with me or something? What's all this about you wanting to know where I live?" it should scare him off.
If you want to be more polite or for some reason want him as a friend, just don't reply to his texts at all, don't answer the phone and don't tell him where you live. He should get the message eventually. To be honest, I dont' think you should try to talk to him or even be friends with him. Even texting him once might tell him that you like him in one way or another.
If things really start getting out of hand (I'm talking about stalking or harassment), then change your number and only give it to your closest, most trustworthy friends and make sure you tell a lot of people about him so that they can look out for you. Contact the police if it comes to it.
Don't contact him any more - you will be leading him on.
xx Emmie
2007-12-18 11:20:00 · answer #1 · answered by Sparklepop 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a bit of a weirdo! If ignoring his calls and texts isn't working have you tried having his number barred from calling you? I would also contact the police and let them know what is going on. He may not have done anything that bad yet but people that behave in an abnormal and obsessive way like this are unpredictable and who knows what they are capable of. He may turn out to be harmless but at least if the police have a record of what has happened if it gets worse then they are aware of it. I would also avoid going anywhere alone and always let someone know where you are. Hope that helps.
2007-12-18 10:18:49 · answer #2 · answered by the little mermaid 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes guys just don't get the message. You have to spell it out to him and get him to believe it. Assure him you are not playing any kind of games with him. You REALLY don't want him and that is an end to it. A guy can think you are playing 'hard to get' if you reject him. Men don't take rejection very well. They tend to want to find some kind of rationale where they can think that it was not just because someone just doesn't want them. Occasionally that rationalisation leads them to keep on the pursuit even after they have been told no.
Just keep saying no. Don't explain and don't enter in to any kind of dialogue. Just say no and let that be the end of it. He will get the message in time, but don't be surprised if it takes quite a while.
2007-12-18 09:41:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to block his & his sisters # on your phone that way the calling will stop, then you need to tell him that you don't like over bearing people who push themselves on others, & that is what he is doing, so it needs to stop.
I would complain to the course you attend that they should have never have let your personal info be excessable to others, that is a violation of your privacy & now there is another member who got your info & is bothering you all the time.
If telling this guy to back off doesn't work then go to the police station & get a no contact order put on him, that will or should stop him. If that doesn't work then go get a restraining order.
2007-12-18 09:44:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, in this case, before it gets nasty, just tell him. Please do it 'nice' some people do not realise they are being OTT. But just be straight with this guy so he gets the message. If you have a problem after this, it may be time to bring in the professionals? Note down the date you tell him to 'back off' and then when he calls after that. Good luck. This sounds like this is destressing to you! Bless you.
2007-12-18 09:38:28 · answer #5 · answered by AnneShirley03-03-07 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Confront him and tell him to back off and stop contacting you. If it continues get the authorities involved before it really gets out of hand. You don't want to end up with a stalker on your hands. Also, change your phone number.
2007-12-18 09:34:02 · answer #6 · answered by warrior 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sound like he is stalking you. Tell him once that he needs to stop calling you and his sister needs to stop too. If it doesn't work (and i don't think it will) call the phone company and report him they will contact him and tell him to quit calling or they will press charges. Then call the police about the harassing calls. Between the two of them if it doesn't stop he will have charges filled on him. Good luck. Maybe, next time you should be more careful who you give your information to.
2007-12-18 09:40:07 · answer #7 · answered by love my life 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should confront him first and let him know that you're flattered that he likes you. But he should turn down the volume of texts and calls.
If this doesn't work you should call the police and get him banged up for harassment.
2007-12-18 09:35:28 · answer #8 · answered by Connor J Garfield 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he is ringing on your mobile, then phone the network provider and explain the situation to them.
They may require a crime-reference number for them to take any action.
If this is the situation, go to the police and explain the situation to them also.
2007-12-18 09:37:40 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SAy to him that you are getting a bit overwhelmed with all his phone calls, you have a life outside your friendship and can't devote that much time to him.
If he still doesn't get the message change your phone number.
2007-12-18 09:34:23 · answer #10 · answered by pirate_princess 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋