My boyfriends ex girlfriend broke up with him broke in May, and we all worked at the same job. As soon as they broke up she quit and a few months later me and tom started going out. She never contacted him after they broke up. In about October, she returned to work and completely ignored him, she looked right passed him, but he was trying 2 give her trouble at work, and was so angry that she was back! He even got in trouble with the managers at work. She wasn't doing anything to him when she came back and lately i've been noticing him staring at her. She is beautiful & 100% italian tho. When i brought this up 2 him he says that i am crazy, and that he hates her and he wishes she never came back to work, and cant stand seeing her, but yet i see him stare at her still, or sneaking in lil glances here n there. I dont know what 2 think. He thinks shesa b****. He says he cares about me, loves me. I know its not a sin to look at someone, but its his ex and its constantly!
2007-12-17 19:02:01 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
why is he acting like this if he is with me? Am i overeacting?
2007-12-17 19:02:27 · update #1
why is he acting like this if he is with me? Am i overeacting?
2007-12-17 19:02:34 · update #2
I don't think you're overreacting.. in fact, why would he talk about her with you at all? He hates her? ugh....
He says he doesn't care about her, but if he'd admit he still has feelings (just to himself) he'd be better off.. We dont just throw our feelings into the garbage can after we break up. Many times, we still have feelings for the other person...
If he talks about her all the time, that's a "bad sign".. since you want to know about those.
If they had a long term relationship and just broke up 7 months ago, it's probably too soon for him to become involved again. A person needs time to grieve their losses, and readjust to life after a break up, and has nothing much to give emotionally because they are still emotional about their loss.
If you feel he's all wrapped up emotionally in her, then maybe you could take a break from the relationship for a while, or break up even?
You really need to consider your feelings, too... Look at the big picture, and im sure it won't be hard to figure out if he's still hung up on her, or if he's just bitter..... umm i wouldn't want to be with someone who is bitter, either.
2007-12-17 19:12:26 · answer #1 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You definitely are overreacting but it's normal, or rather, expected. Me & my bf have been 2gether since August. Am I not right that you feel like you are slowly coming out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship? If you are, then of course you wonder if his love is true bcuz you guys are starting to feel the real love instead of all of the fireworks/butterflies :-) ...I honestly can say that I felt this way for a while: "Does he(my bf) think about her(his ex)" "Does he like her still?" What made it worse was a comparison he made, after my niece called me "Aguilera"(bcuz my name is Christina), he said he realized his ex's name, Mariah & my name both are famous names (Mariah Carey & Christina Aguilera). That was the last thing I wanted to hear bcuz I was already wondering how he felt but then there he was comparing us. Anywayz, if he says he loves you most likely he does but yea, don't let him tell you you're crazy for feeling the way you feel. Just know that he's with you for a reason .. exes will always be a part of our history & we will never 4get them but that doesn't mean that we want 2 b w/ them. 4get about how she looks-what matters is what's on the inside anyway. Your beauty shines thru to the outside & don't assume that ppl see u the same way u see urself, either. Just like with models, their quirks become their claim to fame.
2007-12-18 03:31:56 · answer #2 · answered by ♥True love waits♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're overreacting, you can't control where somebody looks. He probably really does hate her. If you are forced to be in proximity of someone you very strongly dislike, it is not uncommon to glance/space out while looking over at them without even realizing it. This would probably look like staring, but it's probably just spacing out and wishing the person would disappear. Ex-gfs (especially b*tches) can be REALLY annoying to be around, regardless of what they're doing. If he is looking by choice, it's probably just morbid curiousity. Besides, what harm is there in looking?
2007-12-18 03:17:08 · answer #3 · answered by Nate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might be over reacting a little, but I can see why. When I am done with someone I don't care what they do either way. He may not be over it, he can still love you though and be hurt by what she did to him. If it bothers you then tell him that you are sick of feeling like he would change the past, or just let him hate her for awhile and get his temper out. Don't let him make you feel bad for having feelings and worries.
2007-12-18 03:07:41 · answer #4 · answered by Sammie Jo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You do not realy know what we males have happen to use when we fall in love we can never realy let go of some one we are like pets joined to our masters we can not not just turn ourselfs off thats why even when we are hurt by a female we still love them
2007-12-18 03:13:59 · answer #5 · answered by Jeffrey M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u're overreacting. it is his ex, so, draaamaa! nostalgic
2007-12-18 03:09:35 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋