Okay, my parents are divorced and both of them are dating other people. anyway, my dad was coming for Xmas dinner, and he just canceled and said he was coming for desert. my mom is so freaking upset, she was yelling and crying in the phone. she's really mad that he's not coming for Xmas and she called his gf "skanky". she's going all out like "oh i'm so sorry your fathers leaving you..bla bla i know how it feels my dad left me when i was young..." she's really annoying. anyway i'm not that sad but i am kinda upset. what should i do about my mom and about my dad not coming... :*(
zoe
2007-12-17 13:13:56 · 4 answers · asked by Zoe Z 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It sounds like your mom still has a few raw emotional outbursts left in her after the divorce.
Tell her that you will be very happy to eat up the rest of that wonderful feast for lunches and snacks.
Talking points:
* Mom, it doesn't matter WHAT you or he are dating, or what you think of each other's dates... treat them nice and don't make any bad comments because something like that just tempts Dad to keep her.
* Dad only dropping by for dessert isn't really important as long as you can see your dad.
* Do you really want his GF hanging around all day? No? Then say hello, serve up some pie and ice-cream and then say goodbye so we can watch a movie!
* You would rather everyone relax and enjoy even short visits
* Nobody is expecting the first couple of people either you or Dad date to actually work out... this is just getting back into practice and getting back into the dating scene. Don't allow yourself to feel pressured over it... just relax and have some fun.
* Remember Mom, I love you both, and I support you both.
2007-12-17 13:40:17 · answer #1 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell your mother to grow up.
Look, they're not married to each other any more. They're each seeing other people. Sounds more like your Mum's still carrying a torch for him.
What's wrong with him just coming for desert? He obviously has obligations where his g/f's concerned too. He's moved on from the marriage, it's time she did and stopped using you as an excuse.
What I'm trying to say is: this is their mess, let them sort it. But tell your mum to move on and stop making things awkward for you. Your Dad hasn't left you; he's proving that by ducking out of Christmas dinner elsewhere to drive to your Mum's (which means no glass of wine or anything too) in time for a bit of Christmas pud. Why not call him and suggest that instead of mucking his day up, he comes over Boxing Day morning and picks you up for a couple of days? Then you'll be able to talk to hi properly without a forced atmosphere between the two of them.
Edit: just realised you don't get Boxing Day in the US.
Have you pointed out to your Mum that your Dad might have liked you to spend Christmas at his this year? After all, you're his kid too, and you're growing up fast. 3 or 4 years and you'll be waning to see *your* b/f at Christmas too. That'll give them something to think about.
Oh, and his g/f's probably perfectly nice; if she isn't what does that say about your dad's taste in women? He was married to your mum for long enough. Give the pooor woman a break.
2007-12-17 21:56:32 · answer #2 · answered by who me? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call up your dad and break down to him and tell him you really love him and that you wanna spend the whole christmas with him. Also say that Christmas is a family time and he is your dad he should spend it with you and not just his girl friend.
2007-12-17 21:41:31 · answer #3 · answered by TheRedHead 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
talk to both parents and find out why on earth your dad is not coming im 13 parents r divorced 2 ask me more q&a if you want.
2007-12-17 21:22:09 · answer #4 · answered by Rissa 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋