why not pursue further studies and become richer? Why not tour the world? Why not buy a bigger apartment? what guarantee is there that your child would not grow up to become a self-centered adult (which most of us are anyway)?
What have WE done to our parents anyway? HONEST REPLY please.. We all grow up to become selfish anyway... Right? Why then do some parents (esp. mothers) entertain this Utopian and visionary dream that their newborn/unborn bany would grow up to be another sacrificial saint? They are setting themselves up for disappointment. Why not work hard and play hard?
2007-12-17 12:25:34 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I'm on the same page. And that is why I don't have children or plan on having them.
Here some reasons people have children:
1) They don't have the intellect to pursue further studies to become richer. Instead their big accomplishment is children.
2) They believe that having their own child will bring them happiness. When, in fact, it will not bring all parents happiness.
3) Everyone else does it......
4) To keep a partner.
5) It was an accident and they don't believe in abortion.
6)To create a bond between spouses.
7) External pressure from friends, family, or society.
8) Because women are socially conditioned from a young age to become mothers. That's why girls play with baby dolls, strollers, and miniature kitchens.
2007-12-18 04:50:50 · answer #1 · answered by kidfree 4 · 2⤊ 4⤋
I don't expect my children to be any thing other then people when they grow up. And you know I think its really entitled of you to assume that everyone has the same ideas of what people should do, you believe that having a further studies or becoming richer is a powerful experience and thats what people should do. I don't believe that, I completed college, but I have no need to go on in school cause thats not whats important to me personally. My kids could very possibly grow up to be self-centered, and yes we all really are, but its just proving that by saying its just as important for you to tour the world and get a bigger apartment rather then nurture future generations. Having children is a natural thing that many women fell very attached to doing, its really not anyones place to say that its going through trouble to have children since I don't see it that way at all. Yeah childbirth is painful but its worth the pain because that only last for a few hours but being a mother or father lasts forever and creating another selfish person is satisfing enough for me thanks.
2007-12-17 12:52:43 · answer #2 · answered by Nell 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
lol not all people honestly enjoy a "bigger apartment", If I had to live in an apartment I would smother myself. Why cant you tour the world with a toddler in tact that will amuse you with seeing the world through their eyes. Why cant you pursue further studies and know the meaning of unconditional love all at once. To be honest we all arent the same, and you need to come to grips with that. I am rich because I having such a loving family, what is a huge house full of crap if you have noone to share it with. I dont think anyone thinks there kids are going to be saints but arent babies cute. I mean why say your so cute and innocent and do not know nothing about being selfish adults but your not worth my time because YOU MIGHT grow up to be like this self centered girl on yahoo who will probaly never learn to love. You will never understand but I hope that you will quit judging others for what they like and want out of life.
2007-12-17 12:39:10 · answer #3 · answered by charityislove 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Some people find that touring the world and having more money to spend on material things are the most important things in life. Some people think that having a child is the most important thing in the world. I persoally, have absolutely nothing in the word more important to me than family. I have 2 kids and nothing else matters as much as them. Some people are just not the parenting type. And childbirth doesn't have to be painful anymore. They have epidurals now so you can choose to have a virtually painless birthing experience if you want it that way. Besides, childbirth only lasts a certain amount of hours, whereas having a child that belongs to you lasts a lifetime!
2007-12-17 15:20:26 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Kay1134♥ 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Raising children *is* working hard and playing hard, if that's what you want to do in life. Studying, building a fortune, travelling - all are good pursuits for people who are interested in those things. And, all of those could potentially turn out horrible, too, just as raising children might do.
I do take exception to your generality that most adults are self-centered and that we all grow up to become selfish. In your world, your view of humanity, the glass is half empty. In my world, my view of humanity, the glass is overflowing with wonderful people - perhaps not 'sacrificial saints' (and doesn't that sound like a horribly boring life, one that most loving parents don't wish for their children at all), but certainly good intentioned, joyous brothers & sisters in the world.
2007-12-17 13:30:29 · answer #5 · answered by Maureen 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Yes, childbirth is very painful. So is raising a child, not to mention the wear and tear on the mother, the expense, the heart break, the sleepless nights, the illnesses, etc. etc. Some women make good mothers, others don't.
2007-12-17 12:29:28 · answer #6 · answered by beez 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Some people just want children. And, there's nothing stopping anyone from continuing their education if they do decide to have children. I have a master's degree and am currently involved in a PhD program AND pregnant.
I have no utopian dream that my child will be anything other than a human being and as a human being will have faults.
~Raja
2007-12-17 12:29:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
Yes giving birth is painful. It is also incredible, empowering, and beautiful.
There are no guarantees in life only choices. There is always something you give up. Have a big family give up privacy. Be a SAHM give up career. Have a career give up on being a SAHM and having a family. Travel or not.
When it comes down to it. I rather have my family then anything in the entire world. They are my heart!
And no I do not believe that we ALL or even most of us grow up to be selfish or saints.
Expect perfection and you will be disappointed with everything.
I value my children, husband and pets much more then any vacation, house, car or other superficial stuff.
Stuff doesn't keep me warm at night or help me smile my family does.
One day we will all be old what will you be left with. A memory of a good career? Property? Stuff?
I will have my family and friends.
2007-12-17 12:40:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 3⤋
As difficult and complicated my pregnancies were, and as painful and scary my two emergency c/sections were, I would never have done anything differently. My husband and I have two wonderful children, we adore them, they are our life. Our son plays hockey, is a great student. Our daughter, born with a cleft lip/palate, is a beautiful little girl who is just thriving in kindergarten. I have no regrets.
Apparently you grew up to become selfish, but I know that I haven't. Why generalize and say that we ALL grow up to be selfish? Speak for yourself.
You're not a parent, I'm guessing.
2007-12-18 02:29:05 · answer #9 · answered by AV 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I have a 2 month old daughter, and I would endure the horrible 27 hour labor every day of my life just to see her beautiful smile. And she will eventually grow up. She may or may not be a "self-centered" person, but either way, she brings great joy to my life. I'm sorry that you obviously haven't felt the kind of love that a mother knows.
2007-12-17 14:12:45 · answer #10 · answered by Erin B 4 · 2⤊ 3⤋