My cousins are commin soon, and I want to tell some GOOD jokes. Most of them are around sixth or seventh grade, sothay have to be for kids. thax
2007-12-17 09:46:14 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
come on people she said she wanted good jokes
2007-12-18 08:32:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1)TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria!
2)TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
3)TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!
4)TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
5)TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
6)TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE : Me!
7)TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the grondthan you are.
8)TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE : I is...
TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE : All right.. "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
9)TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
10)TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's chry
tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father
didn't punish him?"
LOUIS : Because George still had the ax in his hand.
11)TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
12)TEACHER : Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog!;
13)TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher.
14)Teacher: Well, there is one good thing I can tell you about your son.
Father: Oh? What's that?
Teacher: With the grades that he's getting, he can't possibly be cheating.
15)Teacher: Your essay about your cat is the same as your sister's.
Pupil: That is because it is the same cat!
16)Teacher: Do you understand the importance of punctuation?
Student: Oh yes, I always get to school on time.
17)Teacher: Can you tell me what a unit of electricity is called?
Student: What?
Teacher: Correct
18)Teacher: Please name two pronouns.
Student: Who? Me?
Teacher: Correct.
19)Teacher : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Student : Brotherly love.
20)Teacher:What is the difference between a car and a tree?
Student:The car leaves the shed whereas the tree sheds the leaf
2007-12-17 20:05:20 · answer #2 · answered by Philomena 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two muffins are baking in an oven, one muffin looks to the other and says ' Boy its hot in here', the other muffin looks at the first and shouts 'Oh my God! A talking muffin!!'
The first time I heard it I laughed so hard I cried, have fun with your cousins.
2007-12-17 10:55:40 · answer #3 · answered by eden 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drunk walks into a bar and sees a lady setting alone at a table. He grabs her up and kisses her. She slaps him and sakes what he was doing. He says" sorry, but you look just like my wife". She start cussing him. He says" WOW, you even sound like her".
2007-12-17 09:57:31 · answer #4 · answered by Jackolantern 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hope you can keep them laughing ! Keep smiling .
2007-12-17 10:01:33 · answer #5 · answered by Whistler R 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
say silk three times
now say milk three times
ok what do cows drink????
Water
2007-12-17 10:01:38 · answer #6 · answered by biggdawg 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋