I was at a party this weekend and I met a guy and talked to him for a while, then after a while he kissed me really aggressively. I didnt like him like that and I thought it was kind of rude. I pulled away and turned my head the other way but he kept trying to kiss me. I didnt want to be rude and just run away because he was a pretty nice guy, so I didnt know what to do. I went into another room and a few minutes later he sat down next to me and we talked a little more and he tried to kiss me again. then I got up and told one of my friends to get me away from him, and we left the party a little bit after that. What do you think I should have done? Should I have told him to stop? I didn't want to make him feel bad because I was kind of flirting with him and maybe he thought I liked him. Should I have just let him kiss me?
2007-12-17 08:10:39 · 14 answers · asked by rosieposie 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
It sounds like you were in a delicate situation, and I think you handled yourself graciously without humiliating the guy. You could have been more forceful about it if you really wanted to stay at the party, but I think getting far away from people who you don't know and who are behaving badly is always a good idea.
2007-12-17 08:20:12 · answer #1 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No way! They are your lips and even if you were attracted to him that way, he doesn't have the right to kiss you unless you make it obvious you want to be kissed. Getting up and leaving the situation was a good idea. A guy that pushy, even if he seems nice, might not have stopped at kissing. The only thing I would have done in addition to leaving is tell the guy that he's a cool dude but you aren't looking for anything physical with him.
2007-12-17 16:26:16 · answer #2 · answered by ashnperry 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Getting up the first time was good, but you could've been a bit more assertive and told him 'I don't want that' straight out, if you would've liked to stay at the party. It may be a bit rude but it's still best to be honest if he can't take a hint. But if you didn't mind leaving that much then you handled it gracefully by leaving, too.
You definitely should *not* have 'just let him kiss you', that would've been really the worst solution. You'd have hurt yourself by allowing him to do things you didn't want, and him too by leading him on further -how far??
2007-12-17 16:56:32 · answer #3 · answered by Sheriam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have told him to stop, that he misread your intentions. You don't need to do this loudly, just tell him to stop. He may have thought you were interested in a kiss because you were flirting, so a quiet word with him would not have been rude. Of course now that the situation is over, it is really easy to come up with a solution. It sounded like you handled it well at the time.
2007-12-17 16:46:24 · answer #4 · answered by Don Drapers woman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you handled it appropriately, EXCEPT you should have told him to stop when you started to feel uncomfortable with the situation. Otherwise, he may have taken the casual flirting the wrong way, and unfortunately, there are guys out there who believe that "no response" (or no) means "yes".
As long as you set up clear cut boundaries (by tactfully saying no) you'll be letting the guy in on what's not cool with you, and hopefully, he gets the message and stops.
2007-12-17 16:22:02 · answer #5 · answered by Technoshaman 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
In a situation like that if you are uncomfortable you have every right to say stop and no means no.That was aggressive behavior in a case.You should learn how to say no and mean it you do not need to feel guilty you did nothing wrong.Nice guys don't push or insist.Sorry.
2007-12-17 16:34:23 · answer #6 · answered by peppersham 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you mentioned that he was a nice guy. well, nice guys don't continue to do something that makes you feel uncomfortable. especially when you pull away or turn away repeatedly sweetie. there are plenty of fish in the sea. let him go. you will read about him in the newspaper soon i bet.
2007-12-17 16:16:11 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If someone wants to kiss you, and you don't want them, to kiss you... tell them NO.... if they don't take no, for an answer, get away from them, and stay away from them. Flirting is one thing, but you always have the right to say no.
2007-12-17 16:16:16 · answer #8 · answered by Foggy Idea 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should have slapped him the FIRST time he put his hands (or lips) on you!
When someone is disrespecting you like that you want to be nice? He better be glad that wasn't me, he'd still be trying to get my foot out of his a**!
2007-12-17 16:21:32 · answer #9 · answered by Muschi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you did the right thing. You told him no, left the area, and when he persisted, you asked friend for help and left.
2007-12-17 16:18:36 · answer #10 · answered by monicanena 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋