my fiancees mother has diowned him as long as he stays with me , and now she has been telling to talk to his ex girlfriend, because she was nice and got her a phone through her work. so my question is should i try and talk to his mother or just sit back and watch her try to destroy our relationship?
2007-12-17 06:57:39 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think you should try to talk to her. Don't be mean or hateful, just give her a chance to know you. Maybe once she sees that you two are happy together, she'll back off and leave you alone.
2007-12-17 07:01:26 · answer #1 · answered by kj 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
My mom was a very even tempered, sweet dispositioned lady. However her mother in law did something, treated her somehow, that got her so mad she never let her have a thing to do with me, her grandchild. It broke her heart. I imagined she pined away her last years wishing to God she had been nicer to my mom. Unless you have something pretty bad in your past, or in your character, the mom ought to at least try to be civilized to you. But if you have severe character flaws she's only trying to protect her son. So assess yourself. Honestly. Are there areas where you honestly need to improve yourself? Admit it if its true, and take care of it. Otherwise, pass the story of my mom and her mother in law around because it might help the lady understand that her real interest requires good at least polite relations between you two. And for what its worth, resist ANY temptation to put your guy in the middle because that would be exactly what the mom wants and needs to destroy your relationship. If you have anything to say about her at all, be charitable and kind and positive in your remarks. Good luck, its a difficult situation.
2007-12-17 07:06:21 · answer #2 · answered by jxt299 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have been there, and now I am on good terms with my future mother in law. I really like her. Does she live close? Mother's have a hard time letting go of there boys so if she lives close invite her out with you guys. She just needs to know you love her son and aren't trying to take him away from the family. That is all I can tell you from the info you have. Goodluck it is hard work but worth it in the end.
2007-12-17 07:02:49 · answer #3 · answered by Super_freak 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OMG, hunny! RUN! Run as fast as you can!
An overbearing mother like that is going to be a big problem in your marriage (been there, got the T-shirt). If you don't set down your foot good and hard, like NOW, one day you'll come home and find her scrubbing your shower because you didn't do it right.
If your fiancee won't stand up to his mother with your insistence, then you really have a mama's boy there, and you might want to keep on shopping for a man with a backbone. He should respect you and let go of his mother's skirt.
Good luck to you!
2007-12-17 07:02:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you dont know already, try to find the reasons why she doesnt like you, then discuss them with her. Different race? Different religion? Background? the way you dress? your manners? There could be a GAZILLION things. Maybe shes just scared since her son is getting married that he is now taken from her. Talk to him about it and tell him you want to spend the rest of your life with him, but you are constantly worrying that she will break them apart.
And, if he comes in contact with his ex just because his mommy wants him to -- it's time to suck up what pride you have left, and find a MAN. I'm sure he wont do this, but you dont need the stress.
I wish you guys luck. :)
2007-12-17 07:03:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry. My mother-in-law is the exact same way. It has been difficult, but as long as your fiancee always stands up for you, no matter what, then you are fine. But honestly, it isn't going to do you any good to try to get along with her. I've tried for almost five years. We finally had our last and final arguement ever and have agreed never to speak again.
2007-12-17 07:01:49 · answer #6 · answered by *Almost ready* 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Its purely organic to experience accountable. All i will think of is that a minimum of you men did some thing on the subject of the sorrowful relationships you have been in. Im optimistic if your better half became into unhappy adequate to circulate away the marriage then his spouse would have had an thought it wasnt working.
2016-10-11 11:42:04 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am glad to know I am not the only one who has had problems with their future MIL. LOL I went through the same thing and I talked to her. I told her that I wasn't going anywere and whether she liked it or not she would have to get use to me but to knock off the junior high bull and move on. Her son is a big boy and knows who he wants to be with. Make sure you let your fiance know what was said so she can't twist it around to him. (Thats what mine did and it caused a nice 'ol arguement.) I hope this helps. :0)
2007-12-17 07:04:21 · answer #8 · answered by Kmott 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Youur fiancee needs to talk to his mother and put a stop to all she is trying to do.
2007-12-17 07:08:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You know, as much as you want to fix this, It is his responsibility to initaiate something. This is HIS mother. He needs to defend you to her first and foremost. Ask him if he thinks your relationship is worth roughing this storm, because dear, this storm will be a rough one. He needs to tell his mom that he loves YOU, not the ex girlfriend, and hopefully she can come to peace with that. Good Luck, I think you are going to need it.
2007-12-17 07:09:35 · answer #10 · answered by Shell 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋