my family doesnt kno, how is the best way i can tell them, the guy im with really wants to meet my family however my family is "somewhat racist" and if it matters ima white gurl with a black guy.... please help!
2007-12-17 06:38:40 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have been in your shoes because am attracted to white men... i don't know why. anyway it is your life you can date whoever you want. i know sometime it hurts to listen to you family say outrageous things about a race you are supposedly like. it is okay it is their own opinion. it happened to me before i have dated a guy who i know his family thought i was not good any for him. and guess what i wa the best thing that could ever happen to him because i was being true to myself. during the time we were dating we had our ups and downs then he broken up with me because his parents asked him to. few months later he called me to get back together but i said know because i knew his family will always interfere between us.i had friends who did not approve i dated white men. anyway i did not want to make the story about myself but wanted to let you know that sometimes it is hard to be in a interracial relationship. try to balance your time between your man and your family because you don't want to give one for another. men come and go family and friends stay be strong and be patient. good luck!
did i tell your my sister does not like me dating white men
2007-12-17 07:00:57 · answer #1 · answered by singlegirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start talking to your family right away. (hi, I've met someone special. He's great, talk about the nice things he does for you, how thoughtful he is. What you like about him. Then let them know "BTW, I need to let you know that he's black.")
They MUST know before they meet your guy that he is a different race. Otherwise they will accuse you of only dating your guy to upset them or to rebel against them. Also warn your guy so he is prepared for any cool receptions that he may recieve.
Understand that you won't change your family overnight, and sometimes not at all, sometimes you won't see change until after your children are born (my cousin saw this with her dad who was one of the biggest racists I have ever known--her biracial son now has his granddaddy wrapped around his little finger).
This is definitely a time when you will need to take a good hard honest look at your family and think about just exactly how biased they are and are you willing to cut ties with them or at least severly limit your time with them if you end up marrying your guy.
Hard choices but these are things that need to be considered when you are dealing with a racist family and you are dating outside of your race.
Remember: you can't live your life to please your family and you are the only one who gets to say who you date, sleep with, marry, have children with.
Good Luck.
2007-12-17 06:56:03 · answer #2 · answered by Invisigoth 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see many of these cases, most of the time it's really hard to change your parents mind because they were brought from a close minded environment, so your best chance would be to get marry with this guy, just like Heidi Klum and Seal, so your parents eventually will have to deal with the fact that they cannot do anything about it, but never be mean with your parents because is not their fault to grow up in a close minded environment and that includes their period of mind set development.
2007-12-17 06:45:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
My sister is dating a black guy and my dad is pretty racist, but after they met each other and my dad got to know him, he really likes him. Give your family time to get to know him.
2007-12-17 06:52:55 · answer #4 · answered by morgan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I like interracial relationships, it shows how much the world has mature. its obvious that your family still immature. tell them how you feel, and don't let what they say effect you realationship.
As for your boyfriend tell him how your parents are, and if he still want to meet them, let him. no harm will come if you don't let it.
2007-12-17 06:45:29 · answer #5 · answered by Nisha 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you met a guy you like and care about ... they should know first you're happy in the realationship. tell them about him, his personality ... and then tell them that he is black ... i bet they're fine as long as you're happy
2007-12-17 06:49:38 · answer #6 · answered by Almondia 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't open with "but Ma I like big one's"
Seriously I don't know but you should tell them wayyyy in advance of arriving! !
2007-12-17 06:43:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋