on a date, how do i avoid awquardness?

Question

Im going on a date tomorrow, and on past dates it been really awquard. How do i avoid it? and if we do have a awquard time how do i stop it?

Its our first date. We have been friends for about 2 weeks not. and we havn't been alone before. hes quite shy. but i can be quite talkative when i want to me. He is talkative once you get to know him..

what im most worried about is awkward silences

Answer 1

learn grammar - first..ummmm, I take it you're prob blonde and hot - so just be yourself and act like you will put out

Answer 2

Get out of there asap. If there is awquardness that means it's not meant to be anyway. When you find the right guy the conversation will just flow naturally. Good Luck!

Answer 3

This can always be so hard to over come!

But a woman I met on a blind date, - before I met & married the girl who is now my wife, caught me off guard with a wonderfully funny and somewhat wicked way to beak the "awkward momement" problem most of us encounter on first and even subsequent dates.

We had just been seated at a rather posh restaurant, a white linen and sterling silver affair, I had just ordered a nice Pinot Noir to go with our starting Hors Dovers, and we were finally alone at the table in an intimate little alcove.

Almost half a minute of silence dragged by, and then I though I heard my date for the evening, this regal looking beauty in perals and a spaghetti strap little black dress, with her hair up say "I let loose a fart so loud at my first piano recital, that I thought it was going to throw me right off of the bench".

I said "Excuse me?" She grinned ear to ear, and repeated what she had said - and then giggling went on to say "Did'nt I just hate those uncomforable silences on a date?"

I was still caught off guard, but could'nt help but grin back conspiratorally, - I liked this girl! She went on the say that If I was game, everytime we fell into one of those "dead air" conversational pockets, we would just blurt out the most embarrassing true thing that we could think of that had happened to ourselves. It was a way to get to know one another, to share secrets, be vulnerable, and to show trust. She only used this strategy with men she found interesting enough to warrant more than just a first date.

I gotta admit this was a novel idea, and it certainly got my attention.

Answer 4

As much as it is going to pain you to hear this: you wont avoid awkwardness until you've reached a certain level of intellectual and emotional maturity to match your physical maturity.

Until you've learned a lot more about the situations you find yourself in, you will continue to act awkwardly, and so will your dates.

Awkwardness is the result of your subconscious mind telling you to do things that, were there no other adults in your society except for you and the person you're dating, would be the very best way for you to strengthen your society by repopulating it as soon as possible, as often as possible, and as young as possible. Increasing the population of your society is how you will find better ways to protect yourselves and each other and to find better ways to feed yourselves and each other. If some disease or some famine or some warfare had wiped out all or most of the other adults in your society, it would be a very good thing to begin repopulating, until your society had enough adults with enogh wisdom to begin realizing that the society had grown too large, and begin to start warning the younger adults (such as yourself) to avoid many pitfalls by wating to become parents until you're older and more mature and wiser than you are right now.

And due to the fact that this society is so FULL of people much older than you, who have collectively seen SO many more pitfalls about parenthood than someone your age has seen, your childhood has been so rife with warnings about what not to do while on dates, that your conscious mind winds up in a pretty constant struggle with your subconscious mind over your behavior.

The result is what we call being awkward.

The only way for you to overcome being awkward yourself is to continue dating as many of the gender you find attractive as you can, to gain at least some experience in the things that cause you the awkwardness. The more you learn about the options you have while in those situations, the more intellectually mature you will become, and at some point, you will become aware of something that will remove the awkwardness from your surroundings. That's when you will have become just that much more emotionally mature.

Once you've reached that: you will no longer be as awkward as you are now.

Again, keep on dating, and keep on learning, and keep on learning things to do to avoid the MANY pitfalls that can befall young adults.

FYI: awkward silences are when BOTH of you are thinking about kissing each other, but are also BOTH of you thinking that if you kissed the other and the other WASN'T thinking about kissing, then the other could wind up hating you for life.

This isn't so, but it's what's on both of your minds.

To test this theory, next time there's an 'awkward silence' hug the guy, and see if he doesn't, within, say about a minute of additional awkwardness on his part, wind up hugging you right back.

That's one of the MANY things that hugs are good for: Kiss-mode testing.

I do NOT recommend that you immdiately go for the good old-fashioned snog, but to allow one of those to simply occur out of nowhere. It won't be out of nowwhere, but it will be out of reaching the emotional maturity necessary for your mind to stop fighting it.

But even THEN, I recommend a lot of braking. After all, there are a LOT of pitfalls that can occur once kissing occurs, and even more thereafter.

Take it slow.

Answer 5

keep on asking your date questions (so it looks like you are really into them) and when they answer, seem interested and ask more about it. Ask about places they have traveled, or want to travel. Ask what they plan to do on the weekend and organise to meet up again (if your interested)
Or dont go on a first date where you have to talk as much try. You could go to the movies, bowling or go carts, something fun.

Answer 6

Stop worrying about awkwardness; just be yourself. If you want to end the date, simply say something like: "I have to get up very early tomorrow; so it's time for me to go home."

Answer 7

Just be your self (piece of duhh advice for u) and just keep conversation going....If that's not the issue then think about what it is....What do you mean by awkward? Like an awkward silence or vibe like you both wanna go home or what??

Answer 8

Be yourself and have self confidence and self respect. Stay calm for it is no big deal going on a date.Just relax and know a little about the character of whom you are going to date, his or her likes and dislikes, interests etc.

Answer 9

Learn about things that interest men, so that you cn bring them up during the course of the night. If you know him well, learn about things that particularly interest him. When you ask a question, make sure that he can not just answer with a "No" or a "yes". Word your question like it is a discussion question.

Example:

Do not say
"You you like animals?"

Instead say
" I have a German Sheppard. What kind of pets do you have?"

Answer 10

The best thing to do is just be yourself, and relax, go with the flow.

Answer 11

when there's awkward silence say something completely random such as "I like ducks" or "my dogs smells like grapefruit" that should brake the tension. Trust me it works every time