make a long story short we been 2gether for a year and 3 months.she has my name tatooed on her back.She lives with me in ny.She had a hard life,mom died when she was young and her father was abusive.She has a godmother that she considers her mother and fam.The house is over crowded.Here's the list of people who live there,godmothr,3 sisters age 20,18 and 15 all got kids.one of the sister's babyfather lives there,a recovering crackhead who is the mother cousin
they live in nj.
she once stayed there for 2 weeks cuz we broke up and they was just using her 2 babysit,send her to the store every 10 mins and clean up the whole house everyday.even 1 of her sisters said that she was being treated like a slave.Its like my girl dont see it,she's blind as a bat.I told her it would be better if she got cool with her father side of the fam.her mom fam is messed up(long story) but her and her father talk sumtime..She said if she lose her godmother fam then she wont have anybody.What should I do
2007-12-16 16:28:57 · 6 answers · asked by ratchet 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Also while she's over here at my house her godmother only calls her once every 2 weeks.Her godsisters NEVER call her,only one of them and she moved out the godmother house herself.That right there shows that they use her just to babysit and they dont love her like she(my girl) think
2007-12-16 16:29:38 · update #1
Her fam dont like me(long story)they also try to break us up sometimes by saying to her "you make the same mistakes your real mom made".My girl is sensitive so when they talk about her real mom,she start crying
2007-12-16 16:30:33 · update #2
all i can say to that is she's lucky to have you
2007-12-16 16:31:57 · answer #1 · answered by tweedledee 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Thers nothing you can do . Your girl is in denial She had been deprived of so much love when she was young that's she is grappling the little bit she received from her godmother . If you really want to help her try slowly to encourage her to get help from a therapist . But never mentioned her past she will be scared and will refuse to go Just tell her you know in therapy you will find joy and peace
2007-12-17 00:50:40 · answer #2 · answered by lala 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's been in abuse for so long that she doesn't know what it is like to have a normal life.
It would be nice if you could get her into some kind of counseling at a local abused women's center.
She needs some help in moving past this whole scene and getting on with her own life. She can have her own family minus the baggage.
2007-12-17 00:42:49 · answer #3 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should let your girlfriend love her family... and if she is doing things for them and babysitting, it's her choice... i hope she's not giving them money all of the time? If so, she needs to remember that SHE has needs and other adults need to pay their own way.... but she might need to figure this out on her own?
You seem to be obsessing over this... if she is living with you in NY, then she is away from them.... let it be. There is no reason for you to obsess because it's not YOUR family or your problem... just ignore them and let her do what she will.
Keep the peace in your relationship. There are things about our partners we don't like all of the time, and in your case, because you feel she's being used -- maybe she doesn't see it that way?
there comes a time in our lives when we really have to accept others at face value, and move forward with our own lives. if you dont' like the way her family lives and acts, then dont' be like them.
take care.
2007-12-17 00:47:04 · answer #4 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why don't you ask your girlfriend to live with you, because I was in the same somewhat situation with your girlfriend.... I live with my mom all my life, and during that time she treated me like ****, and a slave too... I hardly had a life.... So, when I met my boyfriend he show me love and a better life, and right now I am in college and he supports me..... So, what I am saying is you need to help your girlfriend and guide her to a better life, if you see her being mistreated help her out of the situation into something better...
2007-12-17 00:34:59 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her to stand up and be a woman! she can both LOVE them and say NO. sometimes we all need to show eachother tough love if not you will become the family door mat. ask her if she really wants to be a DOOR MAT?????
2007-12-17 00:30:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋