I Have this friend, who would like advice. please help him out as much as you can he's going to tell you whats going on please help him out guys ! because i dont no what to say... heyy, im sick of life in every single way, ( musicly because it never works out with people) bands never work out as planed. and mostly becuase i alwayz feel like ****, and becuase i never have any money, and i only work 1 day a week. realsonship wize i havn't had a girlfriend in 3 years and at home its not working, and i feel like all my friends are abanding me, and i can't trust really anybody and all my close friends live far away. the one girl who i might like lives 2 hours away and theres no spark anymore. my birthday is sometime soon and i don't even feel happy about it. all and all i just feel like **** and lightly i'v been thinking about suicide.
2007-12-16 15:58:33 · 34 answers · asked by teesha_xx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
whatever you do, don't attempt suicide. just dont do it. there is a problem-solver for every problem, and suicide is NOT an option. just because you havent had a girlfriend in 3 years doesnt mean you're any worse off than other people. i've never had a boyfriend... ever. and i'm not some 12-year-old who complains about their relationships. i'm a senior and i've never had a date, never had a boyfriend, and i realize that that's not all there is to life. you can be happy without a boyfriend/girlfriend. if your friends are deserting you, get other ones. and dont give me "it's not that easy"... because it IS. i've had to do it several times. find people who like doing what you like doing. join a club or enroll in a class at a nearby comm. college or something, and find new people. there are over 6 billion people in the world, and i'm sure you don't alreayd know EVERYBODY in the world. there are plenty more people out there. as for family life, there's not much you can do about it, except accept it for what it is and try your best to be happy. if you're unhappy at home, try to be other places as much as possible. if it's a conflict you can resolve, TRY.
your situation might suck, but it WILL get better. you need to believe that. never give up hope because you always, ALWAYS have something to live for.
2007-12-16 16:06:27 · answer #1 · answered by imapastry 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like me...don't let money issues get you down, the federal reserve wants to keep you down, it sucks...but we must not base our happiness on money.
Don't let it destroy your creativity, release your emotions in whatever instrument you play, that is when the best music comes out.
By the way, people are more sad or depressed during their birthday and Christmas holidays because they expect everything to be perfect, and it is usually not perfect.
As far as people abandoning you; I know the feeling; everyone I have ever cared about has abandoned me and betrayed me, it is hard to forgive with all the rage for vengeance, I often have a hard time sleeping at night with all the thoughts flying through my head, it is best to just forgive and forget so it would not bother you.
I suggest to try and stay in touch with the people that you feel have abandoned you, they will eventually come back, it is difficult to have faith in people but we still have to try..
Your music probably is your escape, NEVER resort to drugs or alcohol, they will only bring you down more.
Your not alone, many feel the same way.
Sometimes if you help someone else it would make you feel better, get out there and help someone that needs help.
Also, get plenty of sleep and lots of exercise, try doing some weight lifting...it helps me... and also get sun whenever possible. Exercise releases endorphins which will help you more than anything.
2007-12-16 16:24:50 · answer #2 · answered by G S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! Sounds as though you could use more of a social life, perhaps! Look, you are young and you have years ahead of you. Just because you are not making it in a band, does ot mean you will fail at all you do! It is very difficult to get into that industry. There are many wonderful bands but, few make it!
Please do not be discouraged as you need to focus on a career and getting your education. Try turning some of this defeatedness into an attitude of I CAN DO IT!!
I know that life is hard...this is a fact! However, we do have help if we ask. YOu are obviously, very young still but, I want to tell you that you do not have to live feeling no happiness, no joy and no future! That is a choice! We are the ones who make ourselves happy, noone and no career can accomplish this. It is about how we take the good times and the bad! We make the decision to be happy or, miserable!
I will tell you that I am praying for you as I know you have potential for a great future! It is your choice! I hope that you believe in God but, if you do not....I do and I am praying that God reveals that HE loves you and will help you through tough times! I wish you the best and enjoy your life as it is short enough without considering ending your life!
God bless you,
gail
2007-12-16 16:18:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, um, I am at a loss a little. I have lost several people to suicide. First of all, think of a reason to stay with us. Think about the hurt and pain you would leave behind. Second, you have to concentrate on the good. If you play an instrument then you are already better than me. If you are forming a band at least you are believing in yourself and taking that leap. About your friends abandoning you, if you are always a downer people will get tired of that and not want to be around you. You feel bad because you are depressed. You need to talk to a therapist or counselor. It doesn't mean you are crazy or there is something wrong with you. It is just someone to talk out the problems with. Like us here. We talk things out in Answers, and we give advise. A therapist can do a lot of good. Everyday try to find the beauty in something, and try to see how everything is connected. Take control of things 1 thing at a time. Start with job and money. Get that straightened out then go on to the next thing. If you don't have money for therapy, try a local church or a clinic. they will help you get someone to talk to. Good luck, things will get better. Just don't give up, ok? This time of year gets a lot of people down. Try to get past this rough patch ok? Send me a message if you want to talk. I will always be nice but honest, and I will try to help. I know that killing yourself is not the answer.
2007-12-16 16:16:20 · answer #4 · answered by Amy J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your first problem is that you are thinking too negative. Nobody wants to be around a person that just complains all day. You've got to get some confidence and start putting yourself out there. The bands don't work out because well you're a kid and there's all sorts of drama in bands. You should start going to college, joining clubs, and you should try to find a different job, one that will offer you more hours. Considering how most people in other countries live I'd say you have it pretty good.
2007-12-16 16:02:17 · answer #5 · answered by tyler_shay4 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
zomg. I hate people who try to take the easy way out.
honey if you're going to just give up then you're stupid. You can't expect everything to come to you. You've got to work for it. Get another job, then you'll have money. DUH.
bands are just childish dreams. A passtime and you should do it for the memories not for the fame or the money. if you make it big then woohoo for you. I commend you. If you don't, no big deal, life goes on and it's not going to wait for you to make it big.
if there is no spark then you don't really liker her. move on man! there are so many other girls that could be with you. there might even be someone who's always been there for you and they've liked you for the longest and you're just too caught up being suicidal that you can't see it. truth is that the world does not revolve around you and it is not set on making your life hell. trust me everyone feels like everything is out to get them, but it's NOT.
if everyone lives far away make some new friends. start talking to people. see the school counselors or something. you've got this friend who's willing to post this question for you. I'm sure they're with you to the end. and the end is not now.
who cares about birthdays? they're just some day that you were born on. you don't have to do anything for your birthday. you don't have to celebrate it. just treat it as a normal day and go on with your business. if someone congratulates you on it, don't give them the cold shoulder.
you need jesus in your life. there is so much in the bible that can help you. just have faith and look towards the future that you can have. set and ideal goal and then get to work on making it happen.
2007-12-16 16:10:19 · answer #6 · answered by everything, ever 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Always taking the easy way out, suicide you say, that is another easy way out, selfish with no thought for others.
reading you letter, I see a lot of me me me and poor poor me.
Go to a doctor get some short term antidepressant, get a job,were you actually have to work for your money, then get a job as a volunteer in a hospital for children or a cancer ward, you will soon stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Things do not go well for you in a band, have you though that may be things do not go well for you because you are not very good at it ? It will not be the end of the world, I am sure there are a lot of things you can be excellent at so start to found out what are you good at, we all have special gifts we just have to discover what they are,and get on with it
,
2007-12-16 16:20:22 · answer #7 · answered by Loretta M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find an avenue for creative release (music helps a lot if you're good at it) and get some direction in your life. Make some goals, think about where you want to be in 5 or 10 years, and start working towards it.
Make yourself busy. Get another job (in addition to or to replace your current one) and socialize with some new people.
Going to school is an awesome choice. A few months ago I was in your position almost exactly, from what I read, and looking at school to get out and meet some new people as well as get some more experience under my belt to get a good paying job or whatnot was a great idea. Now I'm more alive than ever.
It can only get better.
As for relationships, don't give up, and don't ever close yourself off to new options (unless you're married!) and keep an open mind. Don't worry about them for now, because people aren't looking for someone who's alone already, that's just depressing. It seems like right now you'd be better off finding yourself than looking for someone else to make it better.
Good luck, and if you need to talk you can email me (at this addy).
People always care.
2007-12-16 16:07:06 · answer #8 · answered by williamsvaught@sbcglobal.net 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is definitely depressed. I know this because I have depression. Right now I know the only thing to do is hold on to that little hope inside you that one day you can achieve your dreams and that if you decide to kill yourself you won't be able to reach those dreams. You need to really seek therapy just go to a guidance counselor(if you are in school) and schedule an appointment with them they will help you see a therapist and they will help you maybe get antidepressants because right now theres nothing you can do on your own there is only therapy and there are drugs to help get your mind better. Therapy really does work its someone who is on YOUR side, they have better answers than anyone has to help you because they are not involved in your life and can put themselves in your shoes.
Stick in there hun. Right now I have absolutely no one. My friends are so involved in their own lives and their happiness that they won't pay attention or even ask about my life and my failure because I used to be a happy person too. I've lost my best friends even my sister is thinking I am being lame and faking my sadness. I am not. I listen to a lot of music (the real rock kinds and indie and real rap) and do yoga and pray a lot.
2007-12-16 16:06:55 · answer #9 · answered by noname 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suicide is never the answer. I understand how you feel. You don't need to rely on people to make you happy. Remember, "I will never leave or forsake you", that is what God says. Trust in Him, we will make things wok out according to His perfect plan. Things may seem hopeless sometimes but really they're not. Life isn't easy we all get lonely. If everyone else in your life goes away, I'll be your best friend. I'm gonna make it a point tonight before I go to sleep to pray for you.
Happy Birthday, save me some cake (I like Chocolate)!
2007-12-16 16:04:16 · answer #10 · answered by beautifulinsanity23 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋