My father is stressing me out?

Question

He's very critical and a dictator. If something goes wrong, its always everyone elses fault never his. For instance today in the car the windshield wippers got stuck and he started yelling at my mom saying if she didn't talk so much this wouldn't have happened. He makes a big fuss over nothing. He keeps calling me chunky and makes me feel like I'm obese which I don't think I am !(5'7 and 140 lbs). He is driving me to some very emotional problems, and even making me hate men. What should I do? I can't move out because I'm too young, have no money, and no where to go.

Answer 1

Your father seems to have issues, and does not seem to use constructive outlets for his frustrations and problems, so he says mean and stupid things.

You can't control him, but what you can do is take care of YOU... remember that your father is just blowing a lot of hot air, and it's not about YOU personally.

Think about it, how on earth could your mom's talking have anything to do with how the windshield wipers are functioning? it's just dumb.

If YOU are pleased with your weight, that is what matters.. If your dad comments, you might let him know that no one is perfect (maybe he could go look into the mirror!)

Hon there's no sense getting yourself upset because someone else has issues... Just chalk it up to the fact that your father has anxiety, doesn't know how to cope wtih his own problems, so causes a fuss...

Letting your dad control your mood and emotions isn't healthy... Let him be miserable. Just because he's crabby doesn't mean you have to be!! Smile at him and move on.

hugs

Answer 2

Wow. I'm going through the same thing (only I'm much older). My dad was verbally and mentally abusive to us when I was your age, too (and he still is). Honey, it's never an easy thing to deal with and there are no easy answers. Just remember this, HIS problems are not your problems. And one day, you can move out and choose to live your life very differently from the way he has chosen to live his.

In the meantime, find someone you can talk to about your problems. Get a hobby that keeps you occuppied. It is not fair that so many parents take out their anger issues on the people closest to them. It is cowardly. Don't hate all men because there are some good ones out there. I promise! Just hang in there, sweetie.

Answer 3

Sorry to hear of your problem. Sounds like your mom and are stressed out . They may be going to each go there own way with out the other one. I am sure you are not being bad. Try to be good , stay out of there fights , and remember they are going throw some kind of bad times. Ask each of them if they would like to talk to you about it. You can't help them and it isn't your fault. But you can give them someone to talk to. Don't take sides . Tell them you will help them as long as they aren't asking you to turn on the other. Ask them if you can pray to the Father in Heaven with them for help. You can be a big help , just stay out of the way and be good. Try to understand there is something wrong.

Answer 4

haha dont worry
my step dad is more of a jerk than your dad
although my step dad never called me fat LOL

try some tips:
1. ignore him
2. tellhim off whenever he says somethign rude like "you are fat" then you can say somethign like "considering the source, i dont think so" LOL
3. stay away from him whenever you sense that he is about to cause any trouble
4. confrotn him and tell him that you dont like how he is treating you
5. completely ignore his entire existence

all the above tips have worked great for me =) my favorite and most efficient method is ignoring my stepda, that way you aren't being disrespectful and he can't find a fault in you for being quiet LOL

good luck

also try to go to the mall or library or with friends as often as you can
just make sure thatyou aren't around for him to annoy you

Answer 5

Read self help books, they'll re enforce the positivity you must do for yourself in order to not get sucked into a negative mind frame. Don't talk back, It'll just make him talk more. Wait until the temper tantrum is over get him alone and somewhere quite. Let him know You make me fill sub conscious please don't Criticize me the way you do. I know you're only trying to help me but you are hurting me more than you know.

Answer 6

hey honey your dad is a jerk?stay away from your dad as much as possible. sounds like your dad is an abuser and has to put you and your mum down to make himself feel Superior well guess what he's nothing but a gutless wonder and is not even fit enough to be called a man because a real dad wouldn't put you down the way your so called father puts you down please honey go and seek out some counselling and don't let this jerk put you off dating when you get older cause believe me their not all as bad as your so called dad,

Answer 7

Your father is a bully. See if a counselor at school can help you. Chances are, he won't change. Keep in mind that you are fine and it is he who is not. Respect yourself no matter what garbage comes out of his mouth. Do not get into conflict with him as it will do you no good.

Answer 8

aww my father is almost the same..... ur so right its never his fault and I really can't stand it anymore........ i havent seen you b4 but I bet your not "chunky" and its rude of him to say that anyway....... I don't really know what to say
but know that your not alone
and
don't run away if your too young

get help if its really serious k bye!!

Answer 9

try sitting down with your mom for a talk to make sure she is aware of the situation and your hard feelings. also try sitting down and talking to another adult you trust.... favorite aunt, friend's parent, church or school worker and ask them for advice and to help you with the issue. consider asking your mom to take you to counseling to help you deal with things. hang in there! growing up is tough, but you can do it! i promise!

Answer 10

it is not hard to be scared of our fathers.