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I had younger (19-20 years old) parents, and I know people who had older parents, and I know that there are advantages and disadvantages for each. Which did you have, and in what ways was it good or bad? For parents, why did you choose to have your children younger, or older?

2007-12-16 11:32:24 · 15 answers · asked by Murrin 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting Parenting

15 answers

It's different for everyone. I'm sure some teens would think only of their child, but not most of them, or they make bad disciplinary and dietary decisions.

We were both 25 and that seems just about right. And of course now there is news that dads over 40 run a risk of triggering autism in their child.

My parents were 18 and 20, and that didn't work out. They hadn't had a chance to do anything they wanted to do, and they resented it.

My husband's parents were 28 and 30. Not too old, and they had plenty of money by then, plus job security so they could take time off to care for their kids when they needed to..
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2007-12-16 11:39:42 · answer #1 · answered by Kacky 7 · 3 3

Dear Miss
Older parents can handle children better then younger parents the reason is the older parents have more patients then the younger people due today the young parents just loose there patients way to quickly and get pushed over the edge and loose the cool faster then the older parents do the older ones know how to handle children better OK when any thing happens the older parents are ready for all the little one tricks of the trade the young ones do not so sorry just a proving fact OK back when my mother married my father my mother was 16 years old and my dad was 26 i am the youngest at 35 the other too are way older the me one by 8 years the other by 6 years so I was the last my mom could not have any more at 24 if she could with the rates now she would if she could with the rate of men and women can have one up to 74 women 66 if in very good health there was a lady in London in the U.K that had one at 66 and one at 70 just goes to show what can happen OK my father came from a really big family of 12 back when he is the only one left in his family

2007-12-16 16:16:39 · answer #2 · answered by no one here 6 · 1 1

My parents were 19 when they had their first. My mother in law was 14 and father in law 17 when they had their first. I married my hubby when I was 18 but waited to finish college (age 22) before we had a baby. My parents and my in laws certainly lacked knowledge of child development and patience. They were abusive to their children. I understand that just because parents are older doesn't necessarily make them better parents but I can't help but wonder if things would have been better if our parents were older, more patient, and better educated. My hubby and I wanted to have our children while we were still young but not too young. I was 22 and he was 25. He has a good job now so I can be a stay at home mom. If we decided to get pregnant when I was younger that would not have been the case. I am happy with our decision. Hope this helps!

2007-12-16 15:58:10 · answer #3 · answered by Stephanie W 4 · 0 0

My husband and I chose to have our children young. When our daughter was born I was 20 years old and he was 26. I am now 22 years old (almost 23) and my husband is now 28, and we are expecting baby #2 in March. We chose to have children while we were young for many reasons. The first being that there is less risk of disease and birth defects in the child and less risk for the mother when the mother is younger. The second reason is that we wanted to be young enough to be able to keep up with and play with our children, play football, run around, go sledding, jump in the leaves, ect. The 3rd reason is that my husband and I want to enjoy our life together after the kids are out of the house and have plenty of time in life to enjoy it - when our daughter, who is currently 2 is out of the house, I will be 38 years old and my husband will be 43 and when our youngest (due in March) is out of the house, I'll only be 40 and my husband will be 45.
Another reason is that when we decided to have kids, we had already been married for 2 years, so we felt that we wanted to start our family and that we were ready.
We will also be young enough to enjoy our grandchildren, and possibly great grandchildren, which will be nice. By the time our kids are out of the house, our home will be long since paid for (if all goes according to plan), and we will be able to travel together and just enjoy our lives together. I look forward to every day as an adventure as a parent- I love being a young mom. Another good thing is that the younger you are, the faster and easier your body will bounce back into shape after being pregnant - yay! :)

2007-12-16 13:15:04 · answer #4 · answered by ~*Mrs. GM2*~ 5 · 0 0

My parents were older (32 for mom and 34 for Dad) and had been trying for 9 years when they finally had me (they had one miscarriage the first year they were married and adopted my older brother in '75) and I have a great relationship with them. I know my mom always wished she was younger, so that she had a little bit more energy for me and my younger & older brothers. I had my son at 28, I'm not sure if that is considered young or old. It was my hope to have my first before I was 32, just because I knew my mom had regrets.

2007-12-16 11:46:08 · answer #5 · answered by PJ's Mom 4 · 2 0

I was the fifth child, born when my mom was 35, dad was 41.
I had my first at 30, two years after my husband and I was married.
I waited to get married til I found the RIGHT one, so the age was what it was! Glad I didn't marry the ones I was serious about at 19 or 24, which would have made me a younger mom.
I think parents just do the best they can, whatever age they are.

2007-12-17 01:21:59 · answer #6 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1 0

I had the oldest parents of anyone in any of my classes or neighborhood. My mother was 28 when I was born, my father 33. When my brother was born 4 years later, they really were the oldest parents around.

I really didn't have any disadvantages in having older parents. My parents were older but they were always fit and took very good care of themselves so the usual arguments that older parents can't play the same as younger parents didn't apply.

My parents were both well established in their careers which means they made good money and were not overly stressed trying to play office politics games. We had a comfortable home and both my brother and I had everything we needed and most of the things we wanted. When I went to college, my parents also had the money to help me out so that I wouldn't graduate so far in debt as to never see a way out.

I plan on waiting to have my children for a few more years as well so that I can give them as good a life as I had.

Peace,
Jenn

2007-12-16 11:45:31 · answer #7 · answered by jenn_smithson 6 · 5 1

I had younger parents, 21 and 22, and the thing that I see as the best was that I have had a great relationship with my grandparents my whole life. They were young enough to still enjoy us grandkids and still have energy and drive now that I am 23. If my parents were older, I might not have had the opporunity to see my grandparents in the same light. Additionally, my parents were pretty cool parents. My mom was never so far removed or 'old' that she liked strange music or really ugly clothes. They were still finding themselves and working out their life together and that helped me to understand that even parents don't have it all figured out. I grew up watching them make mistakes and fix them (one of the best gifts I could have gotten). I don't know what things older parents have to offer...but I hope a lot, as I want the bulk of my children when I am over 30. So, we will see. I want to establish my career and have time with my spouse before we pump out children. I feel I want some time to settle myself before adding kids into the mix...because as much as I will love them...they will be around forever once they are here :)

2007-12-16 11:42:22 · answer #8 · answered by Jules, E, and Liam :) 7 · 2 1

Well, I'm 12 and I have older parents. My dad is 59 and my mom is 54. It's pretty much the same as young parents. People think my mom's 45, people think my dad's my grandpa. But they are more in the know than they would be as grandparents. But my grandparents know pretty much. Well, my mom has a cell phone that is a regular flip Samsung because of her job on Norfolk Naval Base. My dad is a mechanic for our city and fixes police cars. My dad has a RAZR cell phone and he has a laptop and all that good stuff. I live in a big house just like all my friends pretty much. My mom does what younger parents do, she wears tight jeans, she doesn't drink alcohol, and hasn't in twenty years. My dad quit drinking because he has GERD aka acid reflux desease. So I don't know if younger parents do but your not supposed to at my Baptist Christian Church. My mom just decided to have a kid I think because her stepson had got leukemia and died a couple months before I was born, and she just quit taking birth control. I think God kind of meant it that way, though. I don't really know any disadvantages. My parents drive new cars, they get on the computer all the time. No dif to me. I think the advantages are maybe more experience (especially if previous marriage, etc.) That's pretty much it, I mean, my mom's mom (my grandma) has a computer, she's getting a cell phone for Christmas, but shhh keep it a secret!!! But, she got pregnant at like 18, got married at 17. So, that's pretty much it, we have three laptops, I mean, we are in the know. We have enough money for private school. But, I'm going to public next year to ditch the uniform and just for fun. Oh yeah, my parents call people dudes, my mom loves new rock music, and so does my dad they so no dip no duh and all that kind of stuff. My parents, especially my mom have a heart of a thirty five year old. Well, Merry Christmas!!

2007-12-16 11:49:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

I had my first child at 33, I am now 41 and have 2 children under the age of nine..both my husband and I wish we could have had them younger..we don't have as much energy as we did in our 20's..I worry that I wont live long enough to meet my grandchildren.
My mum had us late in life and now she is in her 80's and has health problems that keep her bedridden often and this frustrates her because she would love to take the grandchildren out more often.

2007-12-16 11:55:32 · answer #10 · answered by Raven 2 · 0 0

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