Hi I am 16. My grandfather (he is my guardian) let my 20 year old cousin stay with us. It has been so hard living with her (she does drugs, she steals, sheÕs rude, violent and always wants to fight). I do not know what to do. I have become so depressed over what is happening in this house. He will not tell her to leave. Any creative ideas?
2007-12-16 10:48:04 · 4 answers · asked by Larrieux 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It will not be easy to talk to my grandfather (he is sick and is suffering from dementia). My cousin is doing the exact same things as her mother. He finally had to throw her out, but that was only after something really BIG happened and another relative had to get involved. Well, after some things happened, she refuses to get involved in the current situation Grandpa actually was my cousins guardian to when she was my age. She was to much for him to handle and she had to live with another relative, but she was kicked out of her house too. Her behavior has gotten worse.
My grandfather has a lock, but he keeps losing the key. I also have a lock on the door. That was actually what out last fight was about. she tried to kick my door. I am sorry this is long. I am desperate. I am currently locked in my room now. I will try to talk to my guidance counselor at school tomorrow.
2007-12-16 12:56:29 · update #1
HON, this is a tuff situation..
forget about Ur g'dad helping u..
is there another family member to step in?
it is real hard to get anyone out of Ur house once they move in .. i am talking about legally..
it involves filing papers with the court house..
so ..
U will have to have a family member tell her.. not u..
that she is gonna get caught selling or using or whatever.. and not to bring it there..
she needs to go to jail..
or move somewhere else.
. I understand this has ur life upset..
go tell Ur counselor at school.. or u can call the police and just make a report ask for a officer to come out when she is not home..
and just sit and ask him.. what to do.????
. he is not an attorney and can not give u advise.. but he can give u some ideas..
and they need a report on her.. in case any thing ever should happen to u or g'dad..
good luck.. Happy holidays..
2007-12-16 17:49:50 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your grandfather once again... for as long as she has the drugs calling the shots, you will NOT be able to trust her... you cannot trust an addict. She will lie, cheat and steal to get her next fix.
She will eventually drag some major trouble to your doorstep... gang style. If she brings any drugs into the house, your and your grandfather can be implicated through association.
What my sister did to get rid of her freeloaders was fairly basic and creative... she quit buying groceries, cut off the cable TV and internet access, and put a lock-box on the thermostat.
I would also suggest that your grandfather put a good keyed lock on his bedroom door - and also probably on one closet door - so that any valuables can be held safe from her. She will hock just about anything to sustain her habit.
I would also suggest regular searches of her stuff to remove and get rid of drugs... especially since it is your grandfather's house.
2007-12-16 11:05:55 · answer #2 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about instead of telling her to leave, get your grandfather to find ways to help her fix her life. Try to be a good example and realize she has problems. Her family turning their backs on them isn't going to help her through them.
Maybe she needs to go into rehab, maybe she needs to get caught and go to jail for stealing. Go to a counselor at school and ask for suggestions.
2007-12-16 10:57:25 · answer #3 · answered by Meghan 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you go to school tell someone you trust and see if they can refer you some place to go to get help with that problem in your house.
2007-12-16 10:59:48 · answer #4 · answered by Robin M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋