Why can't elders say Assalam-u-alaikum,First?

Question

I have seen many elders who expect their youngster to greet them first. even if the elder is of 60 and the other person is 45 the elder expects a Salam from the younger one first.
I know someone, this boy is very good in saying salam to whoever he sees. but once he forgot to say Salam to his uncle because he was surrounded by people, That uncle didn't talk to him for weeks, WHY? because this young man didn't say salam to him.

We should teach our children to say Salam first and as swiftly as they can,so that they can understand Islam and the importance of Assalam-u-alaikum in Islam. but why some, infact many people takes this on their egos when the other person forgets to say Salam. They literally wait for the younger one to say salam first.
Please make me understand this concept.
I believe anyone can say Salam first, there is sawab anyhow.~!

@ the One, yes thats what I mean. I believe u r from Pakistan so you can understand well, what I mean. It def. sounds good if the younger person says Salam first.but no egos should get hurt.

Answer 1

well i am from pakistan and i totally agree with you. In pakistan youngers r to say salam to elders one and specially fight starts when a younger of one family dont say salam to an elder of another, they complain to another family that your younger hav not greeted(said salam) to us and there the fights starts lol...it has happened so many times infront of me and that so silly.

Well now coming to teachings of islam, what i HEARD(not exact words) is that in some hidayath that some group should say salam to a bigger group, a rider or person walking should say salam to the people standing still or sitting.....and i am not sure if younger should say salam to elder, may be this is part of it too...u should read the hidayat i am talking about ..u will get authentic hidayat and u will clear about it....and our prophet Muhammad (SAW) used to greet even children, He is indeed great.

but sadly in our cultures, it is made a question of ego. Everyone expect other to say salam first....there are many occasion where two people are of same age or you cant figure out age but still they make it an ego thing and then expect for sawab.

Answer 2

I don't know how much I can stress that this issue of younger people initiating salaam is a cultural one and NOT an Islamic one.
In Islam, Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) says in a hadith that the person approaching should initiate salaam to the person already there, the person walking should initiate to the person standing, and the person standing should initiate to the person sitting.
So if someone enters a room, that person should initiate salaam regardless of age!!
Actually, one of my pet peeves is when I enter a room, like my classroom, and my students initiate salaam before I even get a chance to initiate myself.
And the one who initiates salaam gets A LOT of hasanat even if the others don't respond.

Answer 3

We have 7 elders, 7 ministerials, 3 regular pioneers, 6 Bethelites and an average 90 publishers. We have our own Kingdom Hall so dont have to share with other congregations. We had 14 aux pioneers in March.

Answer 4

Wow, I don't know. I have never seen this happen before. In fact, the first person to say Salam will get more thawab then the second person who replies, it makes no difference whether you are older or younger. My family always taught me to respect your elders because you should think that they have done more good deeds than you and you should respect those who are younger than you because you should think they did less sins than you. It's not good to have any kind of Pride in Islam, we should all be humble.

Answer 5

In Sunan-e-Abu Dawood, it has been narrated by Hazrat Anas that,

"The Holy Prophet came by us at the time when I was a child together with other children and greeted us all with salaam.
Then the Holy Prophet took hold of my hand and sent me on an errand (with a message). The Holy Prophetwas waiting in the shade of a wall until my return."

Similarly Imaam Nasai narrates from Hazrat Anas that when the Holy Prophet would set out to meet the Ansar, he would greet their children with salaam, and would place his blessed hands upon the children’s heads and make dua for them.

Answer 6

It is stupid culture of sub-continent. They have attach Salam with respect. Elders expect respect from younger ones. Though Rasoolallah taught to say salam first to get more ajar. He used to say salam to children in street.

Answer 7

You know now, I only reply sometimes I used to intiate the salam and now I say nothing because many people don't return salams. Its also better for then because that are not sinning by not returning the salam. but if anyone gives salam i always return it, inshallah.

Answer 8

There is no hard and fast rule regarding saying of Assalamu Alaikum first. The Prophet (PBUH) used to say Salam first to anybody irrespective of age. Anas Raziyallahu Anhu served as a servant of Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) when he was a boy (teen ager). He says Prophet (PBUH) was the first to say Salam to him whenever he met him and he did not get any opportunity to say Salam to the Prophet (PBUH) first since the Prophet (PBUH) said it first.

However, it is better that the younger persons say Salam to the elders first (Mustahab).

Answer 9

i actually heard that whoever gives salaam first, is more honored in the eyes of allah.
And yea in many cultures, the younger person is suppose to say salaam first out of respect but it is not necessary. I guess people dont know the meaning of Asalaam-u-alaikum.

edit : yes i am/was = )

Answer 10

well although it is more polite for younger people to salaam an adult it is only waajib for them to do it if they are in puberty. i honestly think it has more to do w/culture than islaam. sometimes people go a little overboard and mix culture w/islaam which is incorrect to do. but i guess it an individual decsion to get mad at that. i mean that was very immature of the uncle to stop speaking instead of explaining why he was upset to correct the behavior. and by the way you can only be mad at muslim for only 3 days.