An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees'!
'What powerful rivers'!
'What beautiful animals'!
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant the Atheist cried out, 'Oh my God!'
Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. 'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.' 'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?Am I to count you as a believer'?
The atheist looked directly into the light, 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian'?
'Very Well,' said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'
2007-12-16 07:33:06 · 31 answers · asked by Angel Eyes 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
What do you think?
2007-12-16 07:33:31 · update #1
It's a joke!
2007-12-16 07:47:58 · update #2
Sly Fox you stated where is the love?
The true love that you wish to spread with open arms?
For in your words there is only treat and insult, that is not love.
How is this joke an insult and threat
2007-12-16 09:40:36 · update #3
WOW! One for my collection. I personally love all jokes and this sure picks up your spirits!
Bless you for making people laugh and smile. You have a strong Spirit. Peace.
2007-12-16 08:03:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
1, Nice story and an amusing ending.
Oh Dear SusanJ if only it were but a joke.
However from your chose of posting and your profile it seems hard to believe that this was not a poor attempt at making a point!
Jokes that are aim at others are only funny to those who are not at the receiving end and are small minded enough not to understand how it might be perceived.
2, "But what think ye? A certain man had two sons; and he came to the first, and said, Son, go work to day in my vineyard." (Matthew 21:28
"He answered and said, I will not: but afterward he repented, and went." (Matthew 21:29 KJV)
"And he came to the second, and said likewise.
And he answered and said, I go, sir: and went not." (Matthew 21:30 KJV)
Need I go on?
where is the love?
The true love that you wish to spread with open arms?
For in your words there is only treat and insult, that is not love.
2007-12-16 17:16:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sly Fox [King of Fools] 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
An atheist was walking in the woods.
What majestic trees,
What powerful rivers,
What a beautiful big Grizzly.
So he cut the trees, built a hydro dam on the river, then killed the bear and ate it for lunch.
Christians are not the only ones in the woods with guns dear.
2007-12-16 15:45:47 · answer #3 · answered by Buke 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Smart Atheists carry a Magnum revolver,,and Have Bear for supper..although they are very greasy...
So your saying a Christian is safe against Griz attacks,,
Oh dumb statement,,Their just going to heaven after the Bear munches..
2007-12-16 15:44:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
pretty funny. i can take a joke. i have a good one about christians but it would just result in another violation notice, so nevermind. some people just have no sense of humour.
2007-12-16 15:38:37 · answer #5 · answered by amanda c 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Since when does someone using a common phrase imply belief? Change it to "God help me" instead. But this joke is tired and played out anyway.
2007-12-16 15:41:48 · answer #6 · answered by Recreant- father of fairies 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Does saying something mean I believe in it? I can yell Bigfoot or Santa as loud as I could, but it doesn't mean I believe in them.
But still funny. :)
2007-12-16 15:39:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I thought it was mildly entertaining the first time I heard it, but it's getting a little old now.
2007-12-16 15:38:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Funny.
2007-12-16 15:36:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
A Christian was walking through the woods, marveling at the works of God.
He heard a bear coming up behind him and cried out, "Of God, please save me from this bear."
Nothing happened.
And then the bear ate him.
2007-12-16 15:44:55 · answer #10 · answered by skeptik 7 · 6⤊ 1⤋