what should I do???

Question

I'm 28 weeks pregnant with my 1st child & feeling very down. I cry everyday. Most of the time it's something to do with my fiance. Well, I feel like he doesn't really want to be with me or care about me, but he says that he does. For example, today when we woke up he asked if I wanted to go to the mall at 2. I said yes. I was so happy & excited b/c we hardly ever go anywhere/do anything together. Most of his time goes to his friends. Anyway, at about 1:30 he calls back & says let's wait until about 3 or 3:30. I said ok b/c I wasn't ready anyway. I called him at about 2:30 & ask what he's doin. He says nothin & asks what I'm doin. I said about to shower & put my clothes on. Then he suggests let's wait until tomorrow to go. I am crying my eyes out right now b/c he does this EVERYTIME that we plan to be together. It's like his friends r more important. They could plan something & he's right there. And all he can do is say that he's sorry. I feel so sad & lonely. I don't know what to do. I don't know what's wrong. I don't know if he's cheating on me or what. I feel like he's annoyed by me & doesn't really want to be with me , but just can't/won't tell me. Everytime I ask him he says that he does, but he's not doing anything to convince me that he does. Another thing that bothers me is that we hardly ever have sex. Should I just leave him alone & find someone who's willing to spend time with me??? I know that I'm not just being emotional b/c I'm pregnant. Please help!!! =(

Answer 1

I'm not sure how old you are, but you sound fairly young. I would suggest counseling or long discussions with an older, more stable person in your life, like a pastor at your church. The doctor you are seeing for your prenatal care might be able to recommend someone for you also.

This is the father of your child and he does not sound like he is very supportive. Do not let him upset you at this crucial time in your pregnancy. You need to start planning for you and your babies future. Talk to a lawyer about the legal and financial obligations this man will need to be responsible for.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Maybe he feels caught in a situation that he'd rather not be in? Did he enthusiastically want a child or did it just happen? Maybe he just wanted the sex and not the 18-20 yr. commitment that a child brings with it. Some women feel that an expected child will make a relationship stronger. If the male is not ready to be a father, it will only push him away.

I'm not trying to discourage you but these are things you need to know in order to plan your life from this point on. A father who doesn't really want to be involved does not - usually - make a very good father. If you want the best for your child, you need to know where you and your child stand with him and plan your life accordingly. Don't settle for anything less than the best. You're worth more.

Answer 3

My boyfriend started doing the same thing to me three weeks ago; I'm 22 weeks pregnant, too. He started acted horribly, which was something he had NEVER done before. So, I decided it was time for him to go. I packed up his things and dropped them off at his brother's house. It was probably the hardest thing I have ever done, because I do love him so much. But, you can't let someone treat you like sh!t, especially when you're pregnant and have another life to take care of.

There's not really a lot anyone can say to help you. You probably know deep down if it's time to end the relationship, or to keep trying to make it work. Follow your heart! Just remember that you have a baby that needs you to be strong and happy! Crying and being depressed isn't going to help you OR the baby. I had to figure that out the hard way, too. It sucks that a lot of men are assholes, but in the end, it is their loss. At least, that's what I keep telling myself to keep me going. Good luck with everything, congratulations on the baby, and email me if you ever need someone to talk to.

Answer 4

This is not emotional or depression from pregnancy, it's emotional and disappointed by a jerk of a fiance.

Drop him. It's better to go through your pregnancy alone than to have a jerk like him making you upset all the time. Get support from friends or family and slip this man right out of your life. He's lying, undependable, and he won't even spend time with you.

You don't need this now, and you won't need it once a baby's in the picture. Get him out of your life, and demand that he help support you and the baby. Go to court if you have to.

But whatever you do, DON"T SLEEP WITH HIM!! You don't know where he's been anymore. A STD and a baby don't get along.

TX Mom

Answer 5

tell him you want to see other people and see if you can get a reaction out of him, because if he gose along with it he probably is cheating or doesn't want to be with you and if he dose tell him he needs to spend more time with you than his freinds and if he can't do that then they are more important and no one should be more important than the mother of his child and leave him you shoiuld be better off

Answer 6

you should talk to him.