My boyfriend and I are in our 20's and have been bestfriends for 7 years. He wanted me as his girlfriend the whole time and I finally starting having those feelings back. We have been exclusive for a couple months even though we had sex occasionally while we were bestfriends. He never had a problem staying hard during sex unless he was drinking. But now he has this problem all of the time (when not drinking) and my sex drive is way higher than it has ever been. I want it all the time. I don't try to make him give it to me, but he knows that I am ready anytime. I love him and we are considering marriage. I don't want sex to be an issue now that I am finally wanting it, how can I keep him hard or inscrease his sex drive? And I am not at all bad looking so what is wrong, please help me I feel like he does'nt want me anymore. He wants help with this also.
2007-12-15 20:16:58 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Oh and for those that don't think he is interested, it was HIS idea to get married in the first place. And what made him talk to me in the first place is my looks. Please don't be mean, I really need help.
2007-12-15 20:55:00 · update #1
Is he on any kind of medication? This sometimes is a side effect. Stress is also a factor. Any big deadlines at work or family problems. Fighting in the relationship? Try talking to him and find out if there's anything on his mind. Maybe he's worried you'll get pregnant sometimes that can be an issue with men that they don't like to discuss with their women. Maybe try some sex drive enhancement that you can buy at your local gas station. Could just be a phase, but at least try to get him talking to see if there's something wrong that he's not telling you. A heart to heart tends to get them to talking and let you know what they're stressing or nervous about. Hope this helps.
If you two can't find the root to the problem together try a doctor visit (this might be hard or a little embarrassing, but try to look on the bright side)
Could end up being a medical or mental (not in the bad way though) If he thinks he can't keep it up it sometimes that'll make him not be able to because he's got it in his head that he can't. Which will lead to him not wanting to have sex as much.
2007-12-15 20:24:29 · answer #1 · answered by ♥rogue♥ 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Either his sex drive has gone lower or he doesn't feel like having sex, sometimes you have to make him in the mood for it but have you ever had that feeling inside you that made you Not want to do anything sexual at the moment or time, it's OK if you want it all the time or more often women I guess have a more stronger sex drive then men ._. and if you can't get him in the mood wait a few days and if he still can't try to get a prescription for pills to give a higher sex drive.
2007-12-16 09:00:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well my only guess here is that he doesn't want to feel that you are 'ready anytime'. Some guys like the 'play hard to get' type of girl, even as their girlfriend. I'm sure some excitement has left since he knows he can have you whenever. You may want to try politely denying him next time, and then see what happens the time after.....if you can resist!!! hahah good luck
either that or he is cheating, over the relationship, or he needs viagra.
2007-12-15 20:26:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Food and Physical appeals do work. Honestly =)
If possible, try turning him on in the morning.
If both of you are living together, wake up first time in the morning and try stroking in down under. If he still doesn't get hard, something has to be wrong with him.
Alternatively, foods such as strawberries, pineapple, and a little wine does make some good starts to good sex. But I'm not sure if its scientifically proven :P
And, try getting some really sexy wear. A good start will be a nice pair of undergarments. Lace and/or red/black colours do make a men go wild :P
good luck in your sex!
2007-12-15 20:23:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he does love you and wants to marry you, then it could be a medical problem. I am not sure that is necessarily what it is, perhaps you could consider some couple's counseling to see if you can find the root of the problem. I could be something simple like maybe getting married just makes him nervous.
2007-12-15 20:21:40 · answer #5 · answered by Canadian Kim 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This has nothing to do with you! He may have a physical problem that's causing him to lose erection. This has nothing to do with his desire for you. He should go see a doctor, this is very common and can be handled!
2007-12-15 20:36:49 · answer #6 · answered by PerpetualKathy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
do not be so harsh on him. we are all different, and with different sex drives. try to spice it up a little, and have more patience with him. and buy yourself some pleasurable items, to keep your hormons up to date. there is nothing wrong with having a BOB and such in the house. we have needs too. try to talk to him. he may be stressed at work, or feel bad about his body. encourage him and stay by his side.
2007-12-15 20:29:40 · answer #7 · answered by Shameerah B 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you proli wont find decent answers here....
but yeah see a doctor. dont be embarrassed, many reasons can cause it... so i heard from my bros. (they have real stressful jobs)
he could be stressed or sumthing, coz a man in his 20s shouldnt have too much trouble staying hard.
i mean ima 20 and i have problems gettin ma disobedient jonny to calm down.
2007-12-15 20:21:10 · answer #8 · answered by jason D.C 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Look I'm not sure but i can tell you this..
call this radio show they can help you
1-800-LOVE-191
if you care about fixing your problem
www.lovelineshow.com
2007-12-15 20:20:35 · answer #9 · answered by Sarah 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Baby i am going through the same thing. You need to be very care-full. You need to know that the sexual part of you relationship is compatible, not just the emotional. Or else i can guarente it will not work.
2007-12-15 20:21:52 · answer #10 · answered by Jay-C 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋