Why do i have the constant feeling people i try to befriend are being told to stay away or not get involved?

Question

with me?
ive had paranoia for a long time, im a great trauma, abuse and bullying survivor to. i have borderline personality disorder.
ive never made any friends in life at all. because of the problems ive had socially and having low self esteem.

the few friends ive made which are 1 or 2 online, have not made contact for weeks,. i already feel as though im being ostracized and singled out by people, which ive felt for a long time...and the fact that the few good people ive met online have just stopped contacting me.......im thinking theyve been told to discontinue contact and have been told to avoid me....

this is making me angry and depressed and more isolated than i already feel....

ive begun to isolate myself, have bad anxiety and panic everyday...i have bleak low moods everyday..

how can i handle the fact that everybody i seem to discover always leaves me....and maybe the fact theyve been told to stay away, not get involved?

Answer 1

First of all, let me sincerely apologize for all that you've experienced in your life. It must be hard to deal with, and I'm so sorry; nobody deserves that.

Second off, I think that you need to realize that these people not befriending you and ignoring you is NOT. YOUR. FAULT. You probably just haven't met the right people, and I'm sorry for that too.These people were never friends. You've met a lot of jerks, and hopefully that'll change soon, but this is NOT the kind of person that is considered a friend.

Isolating yourself is going to make everything so much worse than it is. I really think you need to understand that if you stop putting yourself out there, people aren't going to talk to you. Friendship doesn't serve itself to you on a sliver platter, and you really need to try to get out there and finally meet the right people.




If you're ever feeling crappy or just want to talk, feel free to contact me.

[e-mail]

Answer 2

the feeling that theyve been told to stay away from you is just your paranoia talking. see a therapist about that, usually your health insurence will cover that type of thing. you could also look into getting medication for that. as for making friends, i dont know the exact situations but you might be scaring them away.. try not calling or talking to them every chance you get. for example if youre still in school.. dont sit with the same person every day, dont cling to people. just be friendly and if theres an event, ask someone to go with you.. that way when they remember how fun that event was (sporting event, concert, fair ect) they will remember that they went with you and they will make the connection that youre fun to be with. the more friends you make like this.. the better you will get in social situations and you wont become paranoid about it

Answer 3

You know what don't even worry about that. Sometimes people are busy and they arent always able to talk on line sometimes. Just be yourself and you will be cool. I am sure that no one is telling them anything. When you feel or if you type something you feel you shouldnt erase it and start over. Don't isolate yourself. Go sit outside if you can sometimes, read books, go to the movies or do something away from the computer. Meet other people online make as many friends and you can. Good Luck!!

Answer 4

I'm sure you are already in counseling. Stick with it. It takes time, but it does help. Sooner or later, when you can move past the bad things that are history and you develop a desire to live in the here and now, then you will start working on that shattered personality of your. You'll see that if you don't hang your head and push folks back, then they'll have time to get to know you and may even like you. In the meantime, go to church...for real...it's a good way to get to know people that are willing to love God first and not worry about too much of anything else that they can't change.

Answer 5

Would you please do yourself a big favor and check yourself into a hospital and spend enough time there to be correctly diagnosed by someone other than yourself and carefully monitored both behaviorally and with mediction management. You have been struggling for to long with too many issues. This advice too, I am sure you will ignore, but I am not one that gives up easy. Neither are you obviously, take the first step and admit that you have no control over your thinking, emotions, distortions, etc. Let someone else take over for awhile and give your brain a break. Best wishes, Sweet Pea

Answer 6

Meet people online in different venues who cannot logically know each other or know of each other, and see if you have the same feelings.

If you do, you know they're irrational.

Delusions may be easier to fight if you have a SIMPLE proof that they're false.

If you start coming up with elaborate conspiracy theories to connect them anyway, get help.

Most likely, you're simply less important to them than they are to you, because you're starting from zero while they already have fuller social lives. There's no solution to that but patience.

You have a variety of tough problems. They can be overcome. But they can't all be overcome INSTANTLY.

Answer 7

it is like this: the two you radiate valuable capability so sponges can carry directly to you and suck your capability or you're a minimum of "ordinary" so radiators won't experience such as you in simple terms opt to leech needed capability off them. yet some radiators have sufficient capability for the leechers too so bypass locate one among them, the two way, no person likes to loiter around with a paranoid man or woman. If uncertain in simple terms say not something, and that they're going to think of you're very sensible. regrettably it won't artwork on the internet..

Answer 8

I don't think that they have been told to stay away. But since you do, it must be pretty upsetting. Are you seeing a counselor? Are you on medication? If you are, are you taking it? It sounds like it's time to go to the doctor/psychiatrist and have your meds adjusted. You need to talk to someone right away. Good luck! I care about you and I'm sure most people reading what you said care too!

Answer 9

Have you thought about counseling to discuss what you're going through? I'm sure what you are feeling is not true. You need to sit down and talk this out with someone who can help you,

Answer 10

Perhaps you become too intense & anxious about it.
That can be a turn-off for other people.
Be assured that people don't go around telling others what to do about some third party. You're not that important!