What is an appropriate amount ($) to give as a wedding gift when one is already paying to fly to the wedding??

Question

Mitigating factors: Christmas week wedding, airfare upwards of $500/person, and I'm an attendant in the ceremony.

Answer 1

These other extraneous factors don't come into it at all. As an attendant, especially, you should be giving a special gift. It doesn't have to cost a lot - the meaning is more important than the cost.

Answer 2

Hi. I totally disagree with everyone else. I don't care if I get a zillion thumbs down. I think a couple needs to understand that a person like you that is (a) traveling and having to pay for airfare; and (b) is also putting out money to be an attendant, cannot also afford an extravagant gift.

I don't care who you are...there is no rule that says you need to give the same amount in a card/gift as the cost of the meal. I do not believe that for a minute.

I think what you should do is give from your heart. WHATEVER you can afford. I think that anyone that gets married at this time of year should expect that.

I say give whatever you can afford....if that only means a card with a note of congratulations...so be it! Everyones financial situation is different. Yes, you are "honored" by being asked to be in the wedding....but the couples must (and I hope they do) realize the expense that THEIR wedding is costing you.

Have fun!

Answer 3

My fiance and I are paying 150 per head for our guest at our wedding. we are not expecting any gifts because we believe that our guest attending is the most important to us. But we are also attending some weddings and we have attended alot of weddings and everytime we attend a wedding we give 200 and after finding out we are paying 150 for our guest the next wedding we attend we will give 300. thats just our rule but whatever you can afford thats what you give. people should appreciate anything you give. dont give 25 bucks thats too cheap. nothing under 50. or just get something from the registry if they are registered.

Answer 4

There isn't any appropriate amount. Give what you can afford. Being an attendant in the wedding, you already have incurred a lot of expenses. Wedding gifts are not obligatory, they are optional. I'm sure they would appreciate whatever you can afford. Besides, it's the thought that counts not the amount.

Answer 5

Listen, my friends had to travel far away for my wedding, and I told them I didn't want a gift. Most gave me $50 or so, and that was plenty. I was just happy they were there. The best gift we got from an attendant was a great wedding picture frame. We love it. Maybe try something like that. Gift cards are fantastic too!

Answer 6

I have found that the minimal wedding gift should be $100 from family and $50 from friends. Keep in mind this depends on wedding cost and cost of living in the area.

I also found people don't give as much the 2nd time you get married.

Answer 7

just because you have to travel and are an attendant and it's near Christmas doesn't mean you should skimp on the wedding gift. That's not fair. Give what you think is acceptable and what you can afford. No one can ask for anything more than that.

Answer 8

If you paying to travel & hotel accomadations...not to mention the dress & accesories you had to buy I would assume you've probably got over or close to $2000 into this wedding already. That is obviously more than any regular guest would give. Therefore, I think you should find a small gift to give. Not money. Maybe a engraved frame with their names & wedding date.

I would hate to think the bride & groom would expect much from people in their wedding!

Answer 9

Wedding cash gifts should be at least $100 even if you did have to pay to fly to the ceremony.

Answer 10

I don't think any of that has an effect, to be honest. You willingly accepted being in the wedding party knowing when it was, and where it was. I would give the same gift I would have given if it were local on April.