My boyfriend is 18 and my parents really dont like him. Their taking him to court for statutory rape and are trying to prevent me from seeing him in any way. I just want to know what my rights are for myself and my child. They say it is their decision because they are paying for my medical care.Is it up to them if my boyfriend sees myself and the baby and is in the delivery room or is this up to me?
2007-12-15 03:58:03 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
as far as i know...it doesnt matter who is paying the bill...you are the person who is pregnant and it is YOUR choice on who is in the room with you and who is not!!! On this matter I think your parents authority went straight out the window!!!
2007-12-15 04:03:16 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I really don't believe they can choose who's in the delivery even though their paying. Its your comfortability thats important not the money,..you must not let them choose these important decisions for you. On another note: Hopefully your birthday is soon :) ,..and maybe you need to really try to talk to your parents. Tell them that trying to press charges on him is wrong ,that it takes two to have sex and you very much have just as much responsibility for the creation of this child as he does. Its not right that they are trying to push the father away from you and the child(considering the fact that your keeping it) when as good parents should be trying to bring him closer because your lucky if the father at such a young age even stays for a little while without bailing. If not for you, or your parents comfort, the child is the one you need to be thinking about now. That child needs a father, and its best if he knows his real daddy(especially if the daddy is willing to stay around for him/her). Life decisions are no longer about what is best for you or anyone else,.. their about the baby. Hopefully, i pray, that you have a little bit of responsibility building up in you and you become a stronger personal internally as you grow. You need to think it over and make a strong argument for your parents and its time for you to stand your ground. As a bearer of a new life you no longer must stand down from your position. You are still a child but even more so, an adult now. Adulthood comes with great responsibility. Age and body growth alone do not classify an adult, but the strength you gain through the obstacles you must overcome and the will to surpass more with or without ease or simplicity. You are your own. Be careful with words and do not be rude but have stance and hold your ground and tell your parents exactly how you feel and dont let them put you down any lower than them. State your position and that they cannot make all your decision.. not the important ones. You must understand many parents think they know whats best. Legally when your 18, its all about you girlfriend. I say be careful with your words because i suppose you will need them parents around to help (especially if they are going to push the father away). They should be pushing you forward,..not holding you back. Also, dont let them put stress on you,..its not at all good during a pregnancy(another point you can use). Fight for your rights,..and your man. :P Good Luck Hun.
xox Brittany xox
2007-12-15 08:10:13 · answer #2 · answered by xox Brittany xox 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In your situation I would consider you an emancipated minor. You are not eighteen but should be considered old enough to make decisions on your own rather than have your parents dictate to you. Its nice that your parents are paying for your medical care but that does not take away your rights to dictate how that care is delivered. It would be better if they could put away all the hostility and try to get along with your BF so that all of you can be present at the birth. Tell them how important that is to you. This is a very important time in your life and you need all the support you can get. Every hospital has social workers. Ask them to help you to have this conversation with your family. As the father, he does have the right to see the baby. Your parents really have few rights in this situation. You can call the shots on how you want everything to be. This little child is going to need all of you in its life so the sooner you all can get past the drama the better. Good luck to all of you
2007-12-15 04:12:48 · answer #3 · answered by Diane M 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Your 17 he's 18? In Louisiana there has to be more than 2 years difference to press statutory rape charges! You need to check in the laws there about that!
As far as who is in the delivery room that's up to you! You can kick your parents out if you want. Just because they are paying the bill gives them no right to to control who is there. If they really want to give you a hard time then go the health department and try to get on Medicaid. After the baby is born they will help get the child on to it and then they aren't responsible for any of it.
I'm serious though check the laws for statutory rape in your state. I believe age of consent is 16 or 17 and there has to be 2 years difference to charge any one.
2007-12-15 04:11:09 · answer #4 · answered by renee70466 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
At the hospital it's up to you. You have the right it is your right to decide who u want in the room with you. When you have the baby if they feel like it's up to them tell them to get the hell out and they will.. My sister did that while she was giving birth lol. And then she screamed for my mom to come back in because the baby's father wasn''t there. Every descision u make with your child is up to u... Not ur parents. Yea ur parents have been paying the bill but they'll get over it. They stuck with you all this way even though they hate ur boyfriend but I'm sure they won't throw u out on the street with ur baby. And statutory rape. Wut the hell you guys aren't even a year apart and you weren't raped If I'm correct I think u have to be sixteen with parental consent to have sex with someone over eighteen. You guys have nothing to worry about it's 2007. They can't do anything. Tell them to get over it. U decide ur life. Yes take the help but don't let them run you either. Get a job if you don't already have one and get the hell out. If they decide they'll support u without the craziness then that's fine but you really shouldn't let them think that they run u..
2007-12-15 04:15:55 · answer #5 · answered by tina n 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No. You are the one who is pregnant, you are the one who decides who is allowed in the delivery room. Let your doctor/nurses/hospital know that you WANT your boyfriend in the room.
It sounds to me like you need to pursue being emancipation from your parents. They should not be holding who's paying the bills over you and unless your boyfriend is abusive or criminal they should be pleased that he wants to be in yours and the babys life. At 17 emancipation is not going to be very difficult as you're close to legal age anyway.
Be responsible. I would suggest that you find a non-biased adult you can ask for advice, perhaps a counselor or trusted older friend.
Best of luck to you!
2007-12-15 15:50:12 · answer #6 · answered by Rachel B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure about the specific legality of the situation, but as the father, he as the same rights to access the baby as you do, and so I would think he would be allowed at the baby's delivery. You, as the baby's mother, are in charge of the birth, even if you are under eighteen. You can tell the doctor that you don't want your parents in the delivery room, and he is obligated to not let them in, as you are his patient, not the parents. Stand up for your rights as a mother, and don't let your parents bully you. Your rights do not get taken away when someone else is paying.
2007-12-15 04:03:58 · answer #7 · answered by Jenn 3 · 11⤊ 0⤋
your doctor will back you up about who you want in there with you....however, if rape charges have been filed, i expect that your parents will call the cops and have him arrested if he shows up at the hospital. that would really be awful for you sweetie. you have another option though and i hate to even give you the idea but you can also apply for medicaid and they will cover the cost of the birth. then your parents can't keep laying that load of bull on you. good luck and i hope you have a very happy and healthy baby!!!!
2007-12-15 05:43:50 · answer #8 · answered by 4Xthe fun 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YOU AM HIM LOVE EACH OTHER AND WANNA BE WITH EACH OTHER AND YOUR PREGNANT AND THEY HATE HIM BADLY HE HAS EVERY RIGHT TO BE IN THERE WITH YOU AND WATCH HIS BABY BE BORN,THEY CANT MAKE THAT CHOICE IT'S YOUR CHOICE NOT THERE'S AND THEY BABY DOESN'T NEED TO BE AROUND THAT TYPE OF NONSENSE SO IF YOU HAVE TO I KNO THEY ARE YOUR PARENTS BUT IF YOU HAVE TO KICK THEM OUT THE ROOM BECAUSE THATS NOT FAIR HOW THEY ARE ACTING PLUS THATS WRONG FOR THEM TO TAKE HIM TO COURT FOR RAPE THEY WONT GET ANY WHERE WITH IT YOU MAY NOT BE FAR FROM BEING 18 YOUR SELF PLUS IF IT WERE TO GO THAT FAR YOU CAN TESTIFY AND TELL THE TRUTH AND TELL THEM HE DIDN'T RAPE YOU THAT YOU 2 WANTED THIS YOU GUYS LOVE EACH OTHER AND IF THEY DID THAT YOUR PARENTS WOULD BE IN BIG TROUBLE FOR TRYING TO LIE AND PUT SOME ONE IN HARMS WAY BUT IM HAPPY FOR YOU CONGRADULATIONS ON YOUR BABY AND I HOPE EVERYTHING WORKS OUT FOR YOU BUT THESE ARE YOUR DECISIONS NOT YOURS DO NOT LET YOUR PARENTS RUN OR RULE YOU IN ANY WAY YOUR A MOTHER NOW AND SOON TO BE A GROWN WOMAN DO WHATS RIGHT FOR YOU AND YOUR BABY AND HAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND IN YOUR LIFE AND THAT BABYS RATHER YOUR PARETNS LIKE HIM OR NOT THEY CAN FORCE THINGS LIKE THAT
2007-12-15 04:29:51 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't think they will get anywhere on the statutory rape charges. but you need to look up YOUR state's law. in nevada the legal age of consent is 16, so as long as the other is not over, i want to say, 21, its okay..
I'm sorry you are in that predicament. when you are 18, they will have no say on the situation :]
http://www.actwin.com/eatonohio/gay/consent.htm
i hope that is an accurate list..
2007-12-15 04:14:42 · answer #10 · answered by hey its me :] 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Ask to speak to the doctor privately. Explain what is going on to him or her. Expalin that you want the father to be present. Tell him or her if you want your parents to be present. Your doctor or the social worker at the hospital might be your best ally in this.
2007-12-15 14:41:01 · answer #11 · answered by meridocbrandybuck 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋