Should I? Or Should I not?

Question

I had a crush on a guy for 6 years since I was 10.

I do have suitors during my secondary school (high school) days, but by then I've already developed philophobia, fear of falling in love. Thus, I always gave cold attitude towards guys who were trying to get close to me.

I was 16 when I finally got over my long term crush, because I decided to focus on my studies, and I told myself this, "Forget it, perhaps I am destined to be single."

Later, I went to a post-secondary institution for two years. I focused on my studies a lot, I completely ignored about getting into relationship till the point that some of my classmates thinks I'm gay because I seemed to lack of interest when they talked about guys. But anyway, I graduated with a GPA of 3.847 and got my *** into the best Art College in Asia.

Now here comes the problem,

There's this particular guy who has been staring at me since the first day in college. He's considered popular because he's an international student, mixed blood, has sharp features, really tall which is around 6"3 to 6"5, have great skill in drawing and good personality (from what I heard), and two of my classmates (who already have boyfriend) fancy him. -.- When the first time I caught him staring at me, I was like, "Ok, maybe he's just a another typical popular guy, I doubt he will remembers me." But as time goes on, there were many times we would stared at each other at a distance. We didn't smile, we just stared at each other. Then his classmate began to stared at me too, and I got a bit irritated because of that. And 3 weeks ago, before I begin with my december school break, I happened to attend his class for a makeup lesson. I overheard his classmate (the one who stared at me) turned to him and said "Go and tell her".

But all he could reply to his classmate was keeping quiet and shaking his head.

I don't wish to let my imagination run wild but this has been bothering me for quite a while, especially when I'm on my holiday. He even appeared in my dream for quite a few times ok. I've sort of decided to approach him one day after school has reopened but on the other hand, I'm also afraid that I might make a fool of myself and say the wrong things.

Is this some kind of reward from heaven because I've been holding on for too long, or what? What do you suggest? Should I wait for him to talk to me, or should I make the first move? I'm left with another 3 weeks before school reopens.

garwy,

Thanks, I think so too.

Answer 1

Okay, look at this like a regular problem. You are obviously interested in beginning a relationship, of some sort, with this guy. Either he is interested or he isn't. If you approach him and he is genuinely interested in beginning a relationship with you, then there is probably nothing you're likely to say that will turn him off. Assuming he is genuinely interested. On the other hand, if he isn't interested in establishing a relationship with you it won't matter what you say because nothing will work. So your choices are to move or not. If you move, you will at least find out whether there is something worth exploring. If you don't move, he may be too shy to move and neither of you will ever know if this could be the romance of hte century. So my vote is to go for it. And, good luck.

Answer 2

You have been closed off from guys because you have been hurt. However, now you have some interest in a guy but you are still dealing with your fears of being hurt. Sometimes, those fears can make you appear closed off to others. If you do not have the courage to approach him and ask him out, then work on making yourself open to approach you, by saying hello, and smiling when you see him. Ask him how his holidays were. By doing these simple things, you will make yourself more approachable because you are showing interest in him. See where that takes you. Just remember that as long as your door is closed, then no one can come in to warm your heart. Enjoy your holidays, and stop worrying because the break will give you something to talk about when you get back.

Good luck.

Answer 3

From all indications, he likes you. You certainly like him. His friends and your friends are trying to give you both the signal to speak to each other. You are probably very standoffish...for goodness sakes, its time to get over the "I had a crush on someone from age 10 till 16" as an excuse to avoid people. For all your dreaming about him, I expect you are putting out 'hands off' signals to anyone. If you like him...go up to him, ask him if he wants to have a coffee, say hello, say ANYTHING and see what happens.

But you already know what you should do...you are just looking for excuses not to do it. like I said: sorry, but get over being 10 years old and start acting like an adult. Or he is going to lose interest in an ice queen and move on before you even find out...which with your behaviour pattern is exactly what you seem to be seeking. Don't let that happen.

Answer 4

I kinda know what it feels like. I studied all my first few years, thinking that what others are doing is pointless. But being more assertive and less timid will benefit you greatly. especially if you're an art major. Just go up to him and say hey, you'r ein alot of my class or something like that. Likely enough this can help you become less timid and build leadership & communication skill that you would never associate with in such a situation but it could make a difference in selling that peice of art or going broke. Be open minded.

Answer 5

Sounds like this guy has worked past your defenses and peaked your interest. So I think go up to him and talk. Maybe the relationship will lead to a good friendship or it could work out to be more. You can never find out until one of you works up the nerve to talk to the other.

Answer 6

Just go with the flow. If u're interested in him too, then go with it. Don't hold ur back, u've been single for a long time and it's time for you to try something new

Answer 7

Make the first move obviously the guy is just as shy as you and doesn't want to make the first move.

Answer 8

It sounds like you have waited long enough!!! Let things happen, just be careful and always consider yourself first.

Answer 9

you tell us about how this guy looks, but give no indication at all that he has a personality.

i think you and he were made for each other.

Answer 10

You need to tell him hwo you feel