ever treated someone you cared about like crap?

Question

im from california and i recently went on a trip to utah with one of my good guy friends, cuz thats where hes origionaly from an while we were there he admitted to me that he was in love with me i think it kinda freaked me out cuz i wasnt expecting it and also i was getting kinda homesick , i didnt know anyone in utah they were all his freinds.. so for the rest of the trip i became very withdrawn and was pretty much giving him a cold shoulder ...well when it was time for us to go home he told me he had decided he was gonna move back to utah to be with his friends and fam that were there and so i went home on a train and he stayed behind but now that im home i miss him like crazy and i feel really bad about the way i was towards him. Its finally starting to sink in that he isnt gonna be around anymore.....im not really sure what i should do...anyone have a similar story?

Answer 1

Do you need to ask?

Call him up and tell him how you feel.

And next time be more mature with the feelings of others!

Answer 2

I had done pretty much the same thing. Once I got home I realized that he wasn't going to be around and I also realized how badly I behaved. I got in touch with him and told him I was sorry for acting childish and asked for his forgiveness. Then I made plans to visit for a short period. When I did I was more opened towards his friends and had a good time. I didn't stay but I did go back to see him once in awhile. He also made trips to see me too. I didn't want to make the move and he wanted to stay there so we just remained good friends.

Answer 3

Well yea, but it's not exactly the same. I saw my guy friend for the first time in 5 years and he has been my friend since I was 2. He looked so different and I was just amazed by how cute I still thought he was. We used to be close but when he came over he wouldn't say a word to me. Not a word. I tried to talk to him and he blew me off and looked at me like i was nothing. I got really angry and upset so I screamed at him and said some really hurtful things. I haven't talked to him since and I feel so bad because he used to like me and now I think he hates me. I probably wont see him again but that's ok. I don't want to. I don't want to feel pain when I'm around him. Don't feel bad. We all have our stories. This 2 shall pass.

Answer 4

I was dating this guy for a little over a year. He was amazing, he did thoughtful things, and was always there to support me with everything i did. But i really treated him like crap, and i didnt see how much he loved me. I've always tried to distance myself from people becuase the thought of being vulnerable with someone scared me. Eventually, I got so used to him being there and putting up with all the crap that I took him for granted. Now, he's given up on us and i can't do anything to change his mind. Its really too late to realize you love someone when they're no longer willing to try. If anything, all i can suggest is that you tell this guy how you feel about the entire thing. Its better late than never, its cliche, but absolutely true.

Answer 5

I have a friend who was just like that only now he went and got married recently. If you care about this guy the way that he cares about you dont let him slip away. But if you are only missing him as a friend dont lead him on because that will only hurt him more.

As for you over reacting, that is completely normal. Any one would react like that. It caught you off guard therefore things became awkward. Dont worry Im sure he understands

Answer 6

I do. But advise for you: Tell him you feel bad for saying that and explain you were in a bad mood etc. because if you don't you'll forever regret it!Believe me I know..... IF YOU REALLY LIKE SOMEONE EVEN AS JUST A FRIEND THEN WHY LET THEM GO? don't lead him on but at least try to be Friends again why should you let someone you like go? Just cause your to embarrassed to tell him? He told you his feelings now its your turn it never to late.
Yes I have one. Its one of the least worst so far....
I was pissed all day, my stupid Friend Villain {her actual nickname} made it worst but i guess that was also my fault and then I had to go to a after school club and I didn't participate. I didn't bother to get the papers I needed and my friend was trying to make me happy and I told her to stop and go away I didn't need her and she just so happened to be the one that pushed me off the edge and I snapped all U had to do was say 4 simple lines that I heard somewhere {don't remember where} and I made her cry. I didn't even feel bad about it. But after like 3 days I felt so guilty that I couldn't sleep at night, guess I deserved it. After words I apologized and told her not to get near me when I'm all cranky and moody and if she does to not talk to me because its hard t control my reactions. To make up for it ill get her a Christmas present! Were still BFF.

Answer 7

Do you realize that the human mind does this subconsciously as a protection mechanism?

My best friend is fighting cancer.

We got to a point where she and I were really at each other's throats. It was really sad to me because she was being very mean and hurtful to me. I did not feel that it was right for me to continue to allow her to treat me the way that she was treating me (becoming a victim to her disease). Yet, as her best friend, I felt obligated to tolerate it because I love her. She is dealing with all kinds of issues over circumstances that she cannot necessarily control, and so are the people around her.

In one of her therapy sessions, our relationship became a point in the discussion. She asked him why she was treating me the way that she was? Her psychiatrist pointed out that she was being so mean to me because, somehow in the back of her mind, she wanted to me to hate her. She was doing this, unknowingly, to protect me from pain. She was doing this out of love. She could not push me away but she wanted me to run away from her. Once that was brought light, she apologized to me and I could better understand.

We've been getting along great, though the cancer is still there. We have to deal with that sad reality, but we cannot be afraid of heartache to the point where it overshadows our affections.

Answer 8

Just break that damn pride of yours and express your feelings towards him so......anyway he started it already so you might as well come out of that shell too, and somehow build a nice freindship and who knows a nice relationship....so let go, tell him what you felt about the whole thing..at first shocked ,and after you have reflected, you felt you have missed him and that something is missing.........it is always ok to be honest with your feelings..it will not make you less a woman...instead an admirable one....good luck! and release.......................say sorry too and i am sure he will be so happy........................ok???

Answer 9

i think everybody feels that way in one way or the another, i had a friend who visited me here for a week. haven't seen him in years. but i had so much on my mind when he came, that i treated him very very bad. and still he was humble. just an hour after i drooped him off at the airport i realized what i had done. i regret it and unfortunately we don't have contact anymore. but if i do see him again i will apologize.

Answer 10

I don't. sorry. But if you want some help with your problem, i can do that. Just call and make sure that he isn't moving because of your actions. That would be horrible. Keep in touch though even if you dont like those long distance relationships.

Answer 11

I also had a good friend who admitted he liked me. He even asked his good friend (a girl) about what she thought of me and him together. I was, also, kind of freaked out. Slowly he started to talk to me (on msn) like he's interested in getting together. I was kinda scared, though. So I blocked him on MSN and kinda feel guilty.

He's still being blocked, even now.