Is it normal to be quite confident in all areas of your life except romantic relationships. I used to be a straight up "playa" but after a while I felt guilty for being so, got burned pretty bad in a relationship, and have ever since resigned to not caring. I have an interesting and fulfilling life without romance and frankly romance can really screw your head up and be distracting. Is this normal? If no, how should I change?
For you peckers who need this to be religious in keeping with R&S, will you pray for me?
2007-12-14 13:25:08 · 23 answers · asked by Aspurtaime Dog Sneeze 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Wee, good questions. I was a player who didn't care. Now I do care about people, but don't want to hurt them or get hurt by misplaced expectations and feelings. Now I don't care if I am with someone or alone.
2007-12-14 13:38:53 · update #1
well ... the right person will make u feel confident is the best i can tell you ..
2007-12-14 13:29:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I believe you care more than you let on. You have attempted not to care to keep from getting hurt. I've seen other people do it. If the right person comes along, you'd do well to expose that soft underbelly once again and take a chance. It's worth the risk and you know it. We all need somebody. That's just how we're made. You may think your life if fulfilling but I will wager that if you became involved in a genuine love relationship you would remember what it's REALLY like to feel happiness. God bless!!
What's a "pecker"? I know one or two definitions but i don't think they would apply here. Sure, I'll pray for you. But I'm not sure I'm a pecker.
2007-12-14 14:31:34 · answer #2 · answered by BERT 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At the moment I have no romance in my life. I got totally fed up with it several years ago because the only guys I met either needed to have their egos fed 24/7 or had the attitude that I should be grateful that they were even noticing me. I really would like to find someone, but I'm not that confident either. Also, a lot of my friends are the same, so I guess it's normal for us. :)
2007-12-14 13:30:34 · answer #3 · answered by Purdey EP 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its perfectly normal. Only change if you have any destructive behavior drugs, crime,etc .I'm glad you got the "player" part of your life over - it means you've matured. Everyone gets burned in a relationship once in a while. It's good that you're confident in your life to the point that you aren't looking for a relationship.
you don't mention if you are religious at all. I will tell you this much, i wish i found Jesus much earlier in my life. I hope you do too.
2007-12-14 14:10:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is wisdom that you are gaining. I have come to a place of contentment without having a "someone" in my life. I am discovering how much freedom I have to up and leave the country or whatever I want to do. Distraction, heartache, etc. do not have to be a part of your life. Why waste time dinking around with all the wrong people?
2007-12-14 13:29:31 · answer #5 · answered by BaseballGrrl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At a deep spiritual level, you have everything you need without getting it from another person. The desire to be with someone, and sex drive may always be there. But it is not gnawing at you when you get to a place of inner peace. That means self-acceptance, total self-acceptance. Too many people try to lose themself in a relationship, when a relationship should really make them find themselves.
2007-12-14 13:31:06 · answer #6 · answered by An Independent 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'll send some positive thoughts out into the universe for you... but you don't need anything like that. You're smart, witty, and not too hard on the eyes... lol
Just wait for it to happen... when it does, you'll know it. In the meantime, yes, it can really mess with your mind, and that is (indeed) normal.
2007-12-14 13:36:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I feel the exact same way.
I am lonely as hell, but I have been hurt so much that love is only fearful for me. I am independent, so I will not settle for just any man in my life. I want someone to love me for who I am right now
I don't believe that I will ever be truly happy until I find love with someone who loves me too.
2007-12-14 13:36:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I ain't no "praya"...
Anyway, an attitude shift can take time, as can a change in behaviors. I seemed to attract bi-polar Scorpios who had screwed up relationships with their fathers. Like, this became a pattern. I realize now a lot of it had to do with my attitude, who I was attracting.
I've changed a lot of my old, self-destructive behaviors and now I find myself in a healthy relationship.
but none of this occured overnight.
2007-12-14 13:33:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it's normal. Although it shouldn't completely prevent you from entering a romantic relationship for too long. I don't see a problem with taking a break for a while though.
2007-12-14 13:29:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm. Something isn't adding up here:
- You were a player. Players don't care.
- Right now, you don't care.
- But in between then and now, you got burned. And nobody gets burned _unless_ they care.
So how did that happen?
2007-12-14 13:31:53 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋