NEEDING ADVICE (pastors and strong christians )?

Question

i have a female friend im 15 we have had arguments and there are wat you would call old wouinds i want our friendship to grow but when im talkin to her its like there isnt anyhting to talk aobut

Answer 1

T. D. Jakes once said it well, "If nothing is happening, don't force it". At 15, you have, unfortunately, experienced some of the worst life has to offer. Relationships form, fade, crumble, break apart, and sometimes are re-established.

You don't have to specify what the old wounds were but apparently they are deep, and deep enough to cause her a great deal of pain. Women of all ages hurt and hurt for a long time. I've seen it for several people I've known. This is sometimes true after arguments, sadly.

It's clear you care for this girl but if you're at a crossroads or point of contention, maybe it's time to step back and give her room. If you have nothing to talk about, so be it. One-way conversations just aren't that great!

But above all, let your local church pastor and/or youth leader know about your concerns. You will get a much more personal response, from someone who should be genuinely concerned for you and your situation. Don't forget, too, to pray and talk to the Lord Jesus Christ, as He is the best Friend anyone can ever know. I do hope all goes well for you.

Answer 2

Countless people are going to come into your life and then leave again. That's life. We all have separate paths to walk, sometimes they intersect, but they almost always diverge again at some point. All you can do is let your friend know you care about her and tell her you're there to listen if she ever needs someone to talk to. To be someones friend means you put them before yourself. Taking some time apart might be good for both of you. If you really want to keep things going though, try and form a new bond. Go off on an adventure together and create some new memories. Maybe a day of skiing, or hiking, or ice skating. Something that is active so you aren't forced to just sit and stare at each other across a table. A volunteer project could also bring you closer together. Organize a clothing or food drive, volunteer together at a museum exhibit. Ask your church to recommend some activities, maybe an alternative spring break, mission type deal. There are tons of possibilities. Hope this helps!

Answer 3

Focus on the Family's Plugged In gives Christian reviews of movies, offering all the positive, negative, profanity,violent, sexual and spiritual content. Part of the conclusion says: Without a doubt, then, The Dark Knight is mesmerizing and thought-provoking. It's guaranteed to become a critical darling while scooping up a bazillion dollars at the box office. But its dark side cannot be ignored. The Chicago Tribune leads its review with this warning: "Sensational, grandly sinister and not for the kids." The New York Daily News tells us, "The PG-13 rating seems tame; this sucker is rough." You're seeing it advertised on everything from cereal boxes to candy bars, but that doesn't make Knight's violence, it's aura of menace, any more digestible. It's not just kids who'll walk out of the film shaken. When you see Harvey Dent's new look for the first time, you barely notice his still pretty-boy right side. The left side—charred, unblinking, horrific—seems to fill the screen. And the same could be said for this movie. Yes, it's undeniably well-crafted. But it's a harsh creation, and by all rights shouldn't have been named after the good guy. The Dark Knight is the Joker's court, and he's not looking for a laugh

Answer 4

Sometimes you just need some time. I've had some pretty dramatic bust-ups with close friends over the years. Let it sit for a while, and then just pick up the phone and start talking about whatever. You reach a point where you're both so anxious to pick up the friendship where you left off that the old wounds don't matter that much anymore.

Answer 5

If it means that much to you, talk about what interests both of you. Talk about the good times you've had.

These verses cover a lot of territory having to do with who we are as Christians, think about them and how you are in Christ:

Philippians 2

1 If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
7 but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8 And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
Shining as Stars
12 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, 13 for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.

14 Do everything without complaining or arguing,
15 so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe 16 as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing. 17 But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. 18 So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.


Just think on it. Also, get an e-mail if you are allowed to. There is only so much that may be communicated on a question/ answer forum.

Answer 6

Best thing and my advice would be to leave it alone

and let what is ....be

cant be a friend unless two can walk together

if the blind lead the blind both will fall in the ditch

forgive , forget , repent
and move on

Answer 7

Agree to 'Let sleeping dogs lie.'
An old saying to forgive and move past the past...
http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l124/zapnyx/christian/23.gif
http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h86/samberlove6/merry-christmas/013.gif

Answer 8

You're 15?!?
Your spelling and grammar would make a 5 year old blush with embarrassment!
Back to remedial English with you Cletus!

Answer 9

Why would Christians only be able to answer this? Do you think non-Christians don't know anything about friendship? Maybe your closed-minded thinking is what's getting between you and your friend.

Answer 10

Sunday school and church activities better to talk about.