I think I'm falling in love with one of my good friends What to do??

Question

I have this female friend...

She's talked me down from a suicide attempt, been there for me to talk to when I was going through a bad breakup and school woes.
She's come to me for advice on boys, school, computer problems and a ton of other stuff. And I've helped her through breakups and similar stuff.

We both grew up in the same town, same high school, but frankly, there are differences - she's kinda snobby, lots of money. And I really don't think she is my type or vice versa - she seems to go for different guys than me.

Yet I think I'm in love with her? Am I really? Or just a good friend?
I certainly don't want to broach the subject of my feelings, as it might hurt the friendship.
Oh, and she's since moved to the midwest - parents got transferred (I'm in Washginton state), and we keep in contact online only, and a phone call sometimes.

We're both college age, not in high school. Over 18, so this isn't some little kid drama.

What should I do?

I *can't* go out with her! She now lives over a thousand miles east of me.

Answer 1

I would've said go for it... until I read the sentence that she moved to the midwest. I am a college sophomore too, and I know what is like to have a crush on one of your good friends from childhood. But speaking from experience, I would recommend that you don't reveal your feelings to her until you get to see her again on regular basis. Otherwise, move on.

It's extremely hard, if not impossible, to start off a romantic relationship as a long-distance relationship. If you've been already dating this girl, then you may be able to work it out. but do not start something when you can't see the person around. it's not worth the effort and pain.

good luck!

Answer 2

Ouch.
A tough situation there.
Oftentimes deep and true friendships can lead to romance, marriage and a long and satisfying life together. Sometimes friendships need to stay friendships.
You're already aware that the differences between the two of you may cause serious problems if you become involved in a relationship, and that's already mature thinking on your part.
One thing that may help clarify your own feelings----think long and hard about what a relationship, a marriage, a life together with your friend, will entail. What do you want, what do you see as the essentials of that relationship? What are you willing to bring to that relationship, what are you willing to compromise to have that life together? Then, and only then, will you stat to understand how you feel.
If you feel deep down that you are willing to make that commitment to her, for the rest of your lives, to work and live and share your struggles and pains and happinesses together, then you can ask her how she feels. Bear in mind that she may not share those feelings for you. But she will know how you feel for her, and can respond.

Answer 3

opp. attract! and the best way to find your soul mate is to become friends first right? and if she has always been there for you and is a good friend is she really all that snobby? if you can talk to her about everything sit her down tell her you dont want to scare her first off, then explain to her how you feel. you never know she could feel the same way. or maybe ts just since she has been there for you so much it could be a little crush or something. i mean are you lonely and needing/ wanting a relationship? sometimes those things can make you feel this way about a dear friend of the opp. sex ya know! talk to her it will help!

Answer 4

nicely first maximum relationships starts off as buddies and bestfriend and so on. yet some buddies dont elect 2 take tha relationship 2 a larger point as though u elect. however the final ingredient 2 do is two b your self take it from me a women loves a guy which could b himself ont attempt 2 b no longer something ur no longer yet save attempting and telling her how u sense make her laught b romantic in simple terms provide her a exciting night 2 undergo in concepts shell turn around yet while she says that she doesnt elect 2 wreck ur friendship up tell her u enjoyed her from the the day u observed her {if u dont in simple terms tell her something that u have been holdn in that u consistently needed 2 tell her} good success

Answer 5

It sounds like you like her more than a friend, just be sure before you make a move. Maybe you should talk to another mate about it, someone who knows both of you.
Good Luck!!

Answer 6

You can have little kid drama in college kiddo, you're still young! I mean how many women have you been with? My point exactly.

Don't blow your friendship. If she's not your type, why force it? Get one who is. If you're not her type, don't try to fit a square peg in a round hole, savvy?

Keep your friendship, and stay away from the incestual relationships.

Answer 7

try to get a little closer to her, but not to close so she thinks something is wrong. Then if you are certain you are in love with her, visit her on your breaks (winter break) and ask her out on a date when you are alone. of she says yes, then she might consider liking you back. but if she says no, play it cool and try to act like it was a joke.

Answer 8

This complicates thinga alot. Make sure you will still be friends if the relationship dosen't work.

Answer 9

you should talk to her and hope she feels the same. if not then its out in the open and you can more on and still be friends. if you dont ask you'll never know!

Answer 10

try it on for size and go out with her a bit, if your childhood friends you should be able to realize that if it wont work and break up and still be friends.