I always have trouble dating; as a matter of fact I hardly ever date. Mainly because of my work schedule but also because I have constant fear of that first date. Most of my dates don't even bother calling me for a second, what am I doing wrong?
2007-12-14 05:37:06 · 19 answers · asked by emer_mirage 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Being gross are shallow are big turn offs, or talking about your ex or all your problems can be a big turn off too. Also being negative
2007-12-14 05:40:40 · answer #1 · answered by ?? yaddajean ?? 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
First of all, stop being so tied to that first date, like it is life or death, like you are searching for the Holy Grail and have to tiptoe to keep it with you. You may look and feel desperate. People can smell fear. #1 turn-off!
Never talk about failed relationships in the past. Or baby names for your first 5 children.
Pay attention to your date. Look straight in the eyes.
Ask questions and listen to the answers.
Use good table manners.
Be upbeat and pleasant, not sarcastic and whiney.
Leave them wanting more.Never tell them everything up front.
Remember, there are lots of people out there. Some are looking for booty calls, some are looking for a relationship, some for a mommy. Keep dating and let it be a fun time, to meet people, not potential a daddy for your future babies.
Men want a fun, interesting, self-entertaining woman. Few people want a project. Beware of them, if they do.
2007-12-14 05:47:19 · answer #2 · answered by Lottie W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
write down as detailed as possible everything about your last date. What you wore, what was said, what you ordered, etc. Then read over what you put down. Discuss it with a close friend and see if there are any ways you can improve.
do you have any platonic male friends? Have a practice date with one of them and have them grade you on the date or if you think you may be too relaxed on the date, have one of your friends set you up on a practice date with someone you don't know and have that person grade you at the end of the date.
Lastly, if it's not you, maybe it's the guys you are picking. For the next few dates, go out with guys you might not normally go out with.
2007-12-14 05:53:16 · answer #3 · answered by Invisigoth 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think telling a lot of negative stories or a negative attitude is bad on a first date. People who complain about past relationships, their job, family life rarely get a second date. You really need to be confident about yourself and not caring whether you get a call for a second date or not. Remember a first date is to show that you are a nice, fun, person who they will want to spend more time with.
2007-12-14 05:42:12 · answer #4 · answered by Brad R 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe youre not doing anything wrong, but the guys you are dating are not right for you. Maybe they are in the wrong for not calling you for a second date. Or maybe your fear of the first date prevents you from showing your true self, which doesnt allow the other person to get to know who you really are.
So just keep dating. You'll get more comfortable, you'll meet someone better, and you'll have 10,000 babies.
2007-12-14 05:41:30 · answer #5 · answered by scottyhb 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I found rudeness and self absorption is a turn off . If someone is rude to their or your parents or siblings , rude to the wait staff, rude to you, it's a total turn off.
Do you moan and complain about how hard your life is , how rotten your ex boyfriend was etc.
Do you only talk about yourself and not listen to your what your date is saying?
There of course could be lots of reasons as to why you don't get called again, maybe you give off the vibe you can't be bothered so why should your date even try.
Rather than thinking of it as ' date' date, why not just go for coffee or a movie, go dutch and put less pressure on yourself and the date.
2007-12-14 05:45:31 · answer #6 · answered by Lizzy-tish 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Fear and lack of confidence in both sexes is a major turn off. Also make sure you don't have bad breath, your teeth aren't yellow. Don't always talk about yourself. Don't interrupt the other person. Don't pass gas. LOL. Just go with the flow honestly. Make good eye contact and answer his or her questions honestly. Make him or her impressed with you and want to ask you out again.
2007-12-14 05:46:47 · answer #7 · answered by dave_83501 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a man, I hate when the girl brags about herself and tells me how great she is. If she is truly a great person I will learn that over time. I also hate it when girls are hung up on their cell phones or other gadgets. Also, don't expect the nicest restaurant in the world, that makes you look like a gold digger. Just be yourself and discuss who you are, don't brag about who you know or what you own.
2007-12-14 05:42:13 · answer #8 · answered by dmbbnl23 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
lots of things can ruin a first date... the obvious is theres no attraction there, the conversation isnt good, lots of awkward pauses, nothing in common, or they feel like its more of a friendship then a relationship vibe they are getting. or they might not ike how you dress, smell, wear your makeup, anything. first dates are very hard to excel at.
2007-12-14 05:41:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
One of the biggest turn offs is talking about previous relationships or sounding like you won't have time. So if they are interested they feel you wouldn't have time for them so they won't call for a second
2007-12-14 05:41:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋