Im nervous about not being able to support my own family?

Question

It just seems like todays world is so expensive. where we live, the cheapest apartment we can find is 1,000 a month. Thats fine but we have a baby on the way, due in march. Together we only bring home about 4,000 a month after taxes. I know there must be some couples that can do it, but im really nervous.

We cant afford to live off only my income, but if she works, we will need daycare, and lord knows daycare is like 250 bucks a week, minimum... we dont have any family around here to help us...

has anyone been able to survive off less? i dont wanna get any government help, because im the kind of person who believes in personal responsibility... we wanted this baby and i want to raise a family, i dont feel other peoples taxes should have to pay for my inabilities... i just get nervous

We no longer go out for meals to save money anyways... both of our vehicles are completely paid off, so no car payments

Answer 1

My husband and I have $1600 a month coming in and I'm working full time. Although, we don't have children. The area we live in pays less but cost of living is very high. We do not have Cable, Internet, Home Phone or any other type of expenses that are NOT necessities. The thing is, there are families with children who have LESS than my husband and I have coming in.

My husband and I only qualify for some government assistance programs, but it's very limited. With your income, I highly doubt you would be eligible for any programs. You may need to re-evaluate your expenses and find out where your money is going. Direct deposit is great when I have a little bit going directly into savings. If you don't see it, you don't think about it.

Answer 2

Look it's been done before you, and
will be done after you. I remember crying for
3 days when my last one was due; I was so
terrified of not being able to support my
family.

However, a kindly older woman sat down
with me and said, "Rest easy. They all take
their place and you'll find it's worth it."

She was so right.

Going to work costs a lot more than we
realize in clothes and childcare and fares
and all that.

So, don't use childcare. One or other of you
stay at home and make the home a lovely
place of refuge for the one going out to
work.

Maybe you and your spouse can get creative;
like maybe you work flat out for two years; then
you be the homemaker while she works.

Whichever one is at home can study part-time
online to increase qualifications; cook cheap
and nutritious meals and do lots of things to
save money.

Maybe your partner can hold a day care at
home, or a play group, with a small fee that
can help fund a few groceries or the phone
bill or something.

(I studied and made a challenge of living
as cheaply as possible. I also got some
night work when baby was past the tiny
stage.)

There are market days and making money
off crafts, if either of you has talent of that
type.

It will all work out well - please just trim all
you can - everything that's unnecessary; and
start thinking creatively. Relax and enjoy
your little family.

Answer 3

Aww, it's normal to feel nervous. $4,000 a month in most places will cut it. You have to do the following thought:

1. Place yourselves on a STRICT BUDGET - and I mean STRICT. Even when you go to the grocery store on a weekly basis - spend no more than $100. Buy generics - most of them are just as good as the brand names nowadays.

2. You can find LOTS of great things at the dollar store (the true dollar stores where everything really is a dollar). I went shopping at the dollar store not to long ago and spent $20. If I had bought the same stuff at Walmart it would have cost me $60!! I'm NOT KIDDING.

3. Restrict your cable television - don't buy HBO, SHOWTIME, etc.. Budget for entertainment.

4. Don't EAT OUT and make your lunches to bring to work with you. Don't grab that cup of coffee in the morning from the coffee shop - make your own coffee - it tastes much better anyways.

5. Buy high efficiency appliances when you can and make sure your home is leak proof (both water and air).

6. BUY flourescent light bulbs for your entire house. THEY ARE AMAZING and save a lot in electricity!

7. Don't eat tons of meat - buy more pasta. Not only is it lower in cholesterol, but you can buy enriched pasta that has lots of vitamins.

8. Don't buy expensive vehicles - and make sure you don't have a SUV, Minivan or Pickup truck unless it gets at least 30 miles to the gallon!

There are millions of things you can do. Every little thing helps. Put yourself on a budget and stick to it. Use Excel to budget yourself. You will be FINE :)

And worse comes to worse, you can get a second part time job working a couple of extra nights a week - that way you can have extras too :)

Answer 4

You might consider finding a responsible adult who would come into your apartment to care for the baby. Many people opt for that. Day care is expensive where you live. But many people have two children and exist on less than $4000 a month. I assume you have one or more car payments that take a chunk out of that $4000. Could you get rid of one car and one of you take mass transportation? What about food. Are you eating out frequently or are you saving money by eating at home?Also, if you and your wife have not sat down and made a monthly budget...do so, and stick to it. Good luck.

Answer 5

Well really, $4000 a month and $1000 rent doesn't sound too bad really. You just need to sit down and work out a good budget and stick to it. You'll be fine.

Mama, shouldn't go to work if she's not making at least enough to cover they daycare involved (this becomes cheaper by the way as they get a little older.)

Besides you're going to find you don't go out as much for awhile anyway, so that'll save a few bucks. New babies are exhausting.....wait all kids are exhausting....lol.

Good luck and congrats.

Answer 6

I remember the year we made $10,000 and were amazed because it didn't stretch any further than it did.

Having a family is not about having a fancy home and furniture. If you can't pay for food, transportation, insurance, utilities and rent on $4000 a month, you are spending for things you don't need. Cut up your credit cards, make a budget and live within your means. You are making plenty of money to support your family on in the USA.

Answer 7

When we first started out, I would work a day shift and my husband would work a night shift that way we didn't need daycare. We also got through college like this too. It was hard as hell, but it definitely paid off. Just budget well, cut out luxuries, and be there for each other.

Answer 8

welcome to the club
get used to working your *** off and being away from your family more thatn being with them
do you have any family that can support or help watch your baby?
that will save huge on the baby sitting and she can work part time to bring in some dough
i am the one working right now and I make about 3600 a month and it is very very tough
i applaud you for your ideals and hope it works out for you but be prepared to be completely stressed out and miss a lot of the growing up because you'll be working all the time

Answer 9

Not sure where you live but there's got to be cheaper housing. Is relocation near family out of the question?

No, $4000 a month isn't much to live on but it can be done.Also, you might look into a rent to own deal or check your local HUD office, lots of housing out there if you can qualify and it's not a handout. good luck :)