In example we have adopted 3 boys whos parents gave them up over 10 years ago, one of the children was 3 months old the others were 4 and 5. Thru myspace the birth mother found them and contacted them behind our backs. Thier myspace was deleted but they go to yahoo, aim , inbox etc and just keep making new myspace accounts. We have parental controls set at home but they go to friends homes or library and just make new ones. Thier Birth mother was a horrible person who had every chance in the world to keep her kids, she only wanted 2 of them , she didn't want the brown child , just the 2 blondes. I know they are just curious, but they went too far and gave out thier real names, our address, and thier birth mother posted pictures of our adopted children on her myspace. The children knew they were adopted. Do you think to have a myspace page a parent should have to actually sign something saying it;s ok to have a page or should children be able to continue endangering themselves?
2007-12-14 01:51:01 · 12 answers · asked by nonya b 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
we tried the restraining order thing,was told at the courthose unless she has made threats that we can't.. Now in contact with children and family services. But I did report her myspace to thier terms of service as you cannot post a picture of another person without thier permissionand our 10 year old definilty didn't give his permission for her to post his picture
2007-12-14 02:03:07 · update #1
You absolutely should know everything your children are doing online and if they go to friends houses, tell the parents and their friends that they are not allowed to access the internet there and if they do they will not be allowed to return. Do not let them go to the library without your supervision. Keep on top of this and do not give up. They are not being safe online.
You show them this story. We showed our children.
Good luck.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/11/28/us/28hoax.html?ex=1353906000&en=a29f1c615f59038a&ei=5088&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss
2007-12-14 06:31:24 · answer #1 · answered by oh_my_its_linda 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely. Especially if the kid is under 18 and still living with parents. Parents are responsible for kids until they are 18 years old. Kids have done things on myspace (and other online sites that are similar) that have made parents lose jobs, and created other very bad situations for families, so the parents definitely have the right to supervise the child's profile. I have been on the internet for many years and if I had kids I wouldn't even let them on the internet unsupervised until they were at least 16 years old. They would definitely not be allowed to have a private computer. Sorry if I am being a little harsh but I know all too well what is out there. I also worked in a computer lab where the 7-8 year old daycare kids would look up porn sites, the computer program was then quickly discontinued and thats probably mild compared to some of the things I have seen.
2016-05-23 22:26:56 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are having a typical problem that adoptive parents have but with new technology.
Your children have a biological mother, and they obviously want a connection to her. This is not a threat to you. She doesn't want these kids, and her pathetic attempts to make herself important in their lives is obvious. However, you are going to drive a wedge between your kids and you by making such a big deal about this. Apparently your kids are old enough to go to friends houses unaccompanied, and that means they are old enough to have a say so in this. Sit down and have a family conversation about how they feel and how you feel.
Part of parenting is trusting both ways, you have to trust that you did a good job raising them and they will do the right thing. At some point your children will be adults and if they want a relationship with her, you can't stop it.
Have you considered joining an adoptive parents support group? I can't believe you are the only one dealing with this, and it might help to talk to other people.
2007-12-14 02:46:11 · answer #3 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I realize that she is no good for them but it sounds like they are going to try any ways so my thought is that you think hard on how you want this to go. They are obviously very curious in their birth mother your are their parents in every other way and no one can deny that you have adopted them a long time ago and they love you very much and that is not going to change. Personally I think and yes you may not agree but I would let them met her under YOUR stipulations you say where,when, how much, everything its up to you and the only way that this is going to stop is if you except it and move forward you can protect your kids only so far but if you keep her away they will find a way to get to her as you have already found out!
2007-12-14 02:31:47 · answer #4 · answered by CrazyH 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe if the children are underage, they aren't supposed to have a myspace at all. I'm not sure though. I know there are certain websites where you have to plug in your D.O.B to show that you are over 18.
But either way, this sounds like a recipe for danger. I can understand them wanting to talk to their 'real' mother, but actually giving out your phone number and address? That's crossing the line...I hope you can have a talk with them and let them know that its OK to talk to their mother, but it isn't OK to pass out personal information.
2007-12-14 01:57:51 · answer #5 · answered by MayMay 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that myspace is a breeding ground for pedaphiles. Children are easily lead to give up personal information. There is no need for a child to have a myspace at all, but regardless there should be some kind of parental permission before a child is able to get one.
2007-12-14 01:57:10 · answer #6 · answered by nene111782 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Take out a restraining order against her. If she continues contact, then have her put into jail for a while.
Yes you have every right to their myspace and every other account until the day they turn 18.
2007-12-14 01:55:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes u have the right. but i think u should let them have connect with their mother. because u know in the end when they are at age to see her legally they are going too. and they are going to resent u for it. I think u should get hold of their mother and talk to her and see what both u guys come to an agreement with her having connect with her kids. as u can see they are already are. u want they to continue to do it behind your back, I know it hurts and its also hard but in the long run those kids are going to love u for it. I wish u the best and good luck .
2007-12-14 02:04:45 · answer #8 · answered by Esperanza 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would honestlly make a police report and put restraining orders on her and all the kids...then if she comes in contact she will go to jail. its a good idea to check up on the kids to make sure they are a safe a good mom does that. and the kids need to realize there are things about there mom you dont want to go into but shes not safe for them...take action now or she may be able to coax them to meet up and this could turn into a kidnapping case
2007-12-14 02:00:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely it is okay to keep an eye on their accounts. Especially because you have real concerns for their safety. My kids are still small, but when they get older I will be keeping a close eye on their internet usage and all of that.
2007-12-14 02:43:07 · answer #10 · answered by Kelly P 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋