Me and my bf. have been dating for four months and i really want to have sex with him. we are both 18 and madly in love. I personally think he is the one for me and i want to be with him forever. He completes me. He feels the same way and told me that he wants to marry me someday, after he goes and gets settled into college. He tells me that he isint ready to have sex yet. What do i do? and why do you think he isint ready?
2007-12-13 15:33:13 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Chill out! He could not feel ready for any number of reasons so just give him space and time! Even if you feel ready it's not fair to push him too soon so suck it up and help him out.
2007-12-13 15:38:27 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I happen to be in a similar situation. Long term relationship, no sex. I think that it is best for a relationship to keep sex out of it until you are married and he probably thinks the same thing. Even if you two are meant for each other and he wants to marry you, there is still much more to ask about and learn before you two are most definitely getting married. He is probably trying to figure out just how sure he is about all of this.
I am a guy, believe me he wants to have sex. But you should be happy he is willing to fight all of his hormones to secure his future with you. Sex now can ruin a lot of things. You could have a baby, one of you may find that you actually are not perfect for each other, and you would have lost your virginity to the wrong person. I hope this doesn't upset you, but sex is a big deal to some, and meaningless to others. Be happy you got one of us, the people who cherish the idea of sex with someone that you actually DO LOVE and will be with FOREVER. He just wants to make sure everything is in place before he makes a decision that will affect BOTH of your lives.
He is doing this for your well being.
2007-12-13 23:39:12 · answer #2 · answered by bone_thugz_2pac 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're only 18... Hey I'm twenty and I still haven't had sex. Having sex with someone is a big commitment and people tend to get attached to that person. If he's not ready respect that, I don't think it's a reflection upon you, I just think he wants to wait until he's married and it's nothing wrong with that. Just cool you jets and wait, when he's ready you'll be that much happier that you did and you both can share a special moment in time.
2007-12-13 23:43:24 · answer #3 · answered by Cescee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can only think of a couple rasons why a male eighteen years old would not want to have sex as often and as much for as long as he could with a gal the same age and driven by nature. 1- he is dead. or 2- he is highly in tune with a spiritual condition of his own design which does not allow for any pre marital sexual events,... he may be a man of veryt srtrong convictions this way.
Get naked, a little sexy lacey thing or two and bring your wares right into play in front of him,.. proceed to tease and play and cause the wanton animalistic desire for a simple mortal event of hard core sex,... and if he doesnt respond ,... he is dead and so I live at 151 Las Palmas avenue in the city of vallejo california ,...I am 51 years old and i am most certainly ready to pleasure any vibrant young woman that may so choose I do so,.... (HINT-HINT)
....cause he needs to know that if he doesn't take care of mamas needs mamas gonna take her needs elsewhere,...unless you are of the same sort of conviction and regard for sex abstinance,...which you are not then it is likely a doomed relationship however,....thats only if the two of you are shallow enough to allow sex to be so important that it would actually have an influence OVER any reasonable behaviours you may exhibit.
In other words,... we love sex but its a mortal and only a mortal pleqasure,.... insignificanty inthe grand scheme of things
spirit livces forever and that is where the love must be so it will live forever as Christ love for us has.
if ya wanny talk dear I am eastpacwolf on yahoo IM anytime.
2007-12-13 23:54:34 · answer #4 · answered by doggie_dundee 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Who know, there must be something really good waiting for him om the otherside .
It sounds Good as long as he can get job security first; let's see, after having sex, you are going to have kids, need yo get married, ne3ed to have a house where to tise a famely....and so on . ALL THAT COSTS $$$$ .
Bills can't be paid with love ,how ever good.
I guess He can get P****at any moment , any time and any where He might think is that good-.
So it might be job securety he is after .
Why don't you ask him?
2007-12-14 19:22:28 · answer #5 · answered by thiny72 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you have a good man for him to think critically. You see if by any chance you get pregnant there goes most of your life supporting a child that is going to grow ABOUT your age before you let him go.
Option one: play it safe go to school and get well established monetary terms or not
Option two: have sex and have the potential to get pregnant and pretty much ruin both of your lifes, and struggle for the most part working in a minmum wage job.
2007-12-13 23:37:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It might be just a matter of his virtues and morals. He may just be waiting for marriage. Each person is raised differently when it comes to sex. It does not mean he does not want to, trust me, all guys do, he just may have a deeper moral dilemma that does not allow him to. YET. Be patient. It will come in due time.
2007-12-13 23:36:54 · answer #7 · answered by DefiantRican 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i'm going to guess that either you're a ho or you've done "it" alot, either way it doesn't matter. This guy knows about it and i've been through this exact same thing, y'all aren't in love, take it from someone that knows...
He doesn't want to have sex with someone that's going to dump him a month later...
2007-12-13 23:43:18 · answer #8 · answered by saeuta 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you two definitly should talk about how you each feel about the matter. I think you need to realize that 4 months of dating really isnt that long. Good luck
2007-12-13 23:38:18 · answer #9 · answered by illHelpuOut 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Four months is too soon. he is being smart, and not risking doing somthing he may regret later on in life. Respect his need to wait, and he should do the same for you.
2007-12-13 23:38:04 · answer #10 · answered by Applejack 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋