I had my daughter when i was 21, her "father" told me when she was 2 weeks old he wanted to sign over his rights and didn't want anything to do with her or me. i said okay.
she is now 4 1/2 and i have never heard from him.
I met a wonderful man and got married he has been there for my daughter since she was 8 months old. he has raised her physically, emotionally and financially.
i found out about 6 months ago my sister has been giving her biological father pictures and info on my daughter so i cut off all ties with my sister, because i felt betrayed she would do that.
well last week my husband and dad were at bible study and my dad brought up that he wished me and my sister would make amends. my husband said he does to but he understands why i would be upset..
my dad said, that he thinks my sister should show "tom" my daughters pics because he is her dad and he should see her.
well i am PISSED, my husband is her daddy that is raising her, her "sperm donar" took off and never
2007-12-13 13:41:35 · 5 answers · asked by 3 girls call me mommy 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
has contacted me.
this really hurt my husbands feelings that my dadsaid this to him.
that is his baby and he loves our daughter very much and she loves him.
i feel hurt and angry..
am i right to feel this way?
what is your opinion
thanks!
2007-12-13 13:42:26 · update #1
also how should i approach this with my dad?
because my daughter goes by my last name and my dad will still use my maiden name as her last name even though my daughter says its wrong.
i am tempted to not go over there for cmas if he can't respect my family.
i really just hate him right now.
2007-12-13 13:44:15 · update #2
I suggest you find out from your father where your child's father is and sue him for back child support. Fair is fair.
I think your family is wrong in not supporting you in your decision. However, you and your husband need to not let this get between you and your family, its just wrong. If you are believers, then you know this isn't how you are supposed to act. You don't have any control over what other people do, just yourself.
Tell your father that as far as you are concerned "Tom" made his decision and he's done nothing to change that in your mind. I would also tell him that this is none of his business, and that your husband has been a father to his granddaughter and he ought to be more respectful of his feelings. Your sister sounds like a troublemaker, I would keep her at arms length.
Bottom line, you have to live with yourselves and what you think is right for your daughter.
2007-12-13 13:50:31 · answer #1 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Please don't "hate" your father, though I can understand why you would be upset. Sounds to me as though your dad and your sister are very much in league with each other, if your dad does not even respect you and your husband to use your daughter's correct legal last name. Sounds as though they think because they are related to you that they can completely disrespect your wishes. I do think that you are probably right to be more distant from your sister and dad, as long as they feel they do not need to respect your parental rights and feel okay undercutting your wishes and needs. It is sad, but they cannot have it both ways. It is not up to them to shove their oar in between the father, and you and your husband and child; I can see why you feel betrayed. Maybe you should be going to a different church? Otherwise there will be a constant tension.
2007-12-13 21:54:50 · answer #2 · answered by eldots53 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you about your sister. Not nice at all. If the bio-dad wanted out and signed off, then he is out.
I would make up with my sister only if she respected my wishes and left things alone with the bio-dad. Otherwise, too bad, so sad.
2007-12-13 22:26:38 · answer #3 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your sister is a turd and you are right. I would totally be pissed off if my sister did that to me, that is my personal business and if i wanted her to tell him things about my daughter, i would tell her. She would have to have my permission first and your sister didnt ask for yours, so you are right and she si wrong, also your boyfriend is wrong too
2007-12-13 21:55:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't know if you go to church or if you are close to God, but try praying over the situation. you will probably feel better.
2007-12-13 22:15:56 · answer #5 · answered by deljac 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋